My brother is jealous or just crazy?

My older brother of 32 has done everything in his powers to tear our family bond between me and my sisters. He is very territorial about our younger sister of 2, she decides to join him on belittling me and my older sister of 30. When my mom was sick he was never there for us and a few years later when he was sick after joining the army in africa (stupid choice) he came back sick and decided to ask for help but my mom kicked him out because he decided to come back when he was sick but when she was sick he wasn't even there. Then he started too influence my younger sister to move out and turned her against her own mother and her sisters who were there for her whenever she needed, but obviously she likes the attention he gives her and completely forgotten the fact he used to bully me and belittle my looks all the time and my older sisters looks. Now he is 32, has no drivers license, no car, Always broke, in debt and no high school degree and lives in dorms while blaming everyone around him for his ''life'', he is THE defenition of a loser and he also yells whenever he talks. I dont feel sorry for him and i believe its the karma he got for trying to ruin our confidence because we are prettier and more loved by men and women in our family. He couldnt stand i got more attention from other men and he said that my younger sister want nothing to do with ''me'' i feel like he is dragging her to his level and she doesn't want to let go of him but she will end up alone if she continues to behave like this. Am in the wrong? is he just jealous? my mom and dad never favored him as a child and they put us girls above.

Updates:
i meant 21 NOT 2

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What Guys Said 2

  • Just be the better older sibling and take the time help out the younger sister and be there for her. And just give him the silent middle finger, if he wants to claim being the better sibling remind him of the running away to Africa. And ask him what happened to the thinking about family. You come back sick broke and your brain washing our sister. You can ruin your life but I'm not letting you ruin our sisters.

    She doesn't have to make the same mistakes you have. If you wanted to be respected clean up "this" and maybe the family would be able to respect you. He seems just like a rebel who needs to learn to fit in. I mean he sounds like a child who has to have everything his way.

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    • hahaha i dont mind if she follows his path but im staying away from that kind of energy

    • I'd just be the better sibling and just show him and her the right path. Your parents will be impressed if you take the leadership role.

  • I'd put blame on your parents for this. He didn't receive equal treatment as a child and it's biting your family in the ass now. You can't blame him 100% for being the way he is. He has every right to tear your family apart because your mom refused to help him when he was sick despite what happened. I believe family should help at all times no matter what the situation is and your family from the beginning turned your back on your brother. Society has already turned it's back on him but his family? Think of his own emotional distress after your mom wouldn't help him. I think pride is also in the way. You aren't letting go what he did as child and that's very immature.

    Bottom line, everyone in your family lacks basic empathy for your brother besides your younger sister. Obviously there's something wrong with your brother and nobody has been there to truly help. He's also dealing with it the wrong way by suppressing his negativity and emotions. It morphed him into who he is today.

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    • no she did help him, she did allow him to come back in her house, but he decided to come back after al those years, my mom got sick of this and she kicked him out because he wouldn't pay her rent, after that she said he could stay but he decided to leave on his own

    • lack of empathy? hahaha i was ill from 12 till 16,5 had the worst physical treatment in the world and he never helped me either, so no i dont feel sorry for him

    • Still i believe there's way more to this past than you told and there's probably way too much to tell. I can guarantee it's probably on your parents end more than anything. Most people who are "losers" tend to be like that from either a lack of parenting or bad parenting. It started at a young age and got worse. It's too late to change his core being but it's not too late to show him family love. Your sister is doing the right thing by helping him but due to his toxic nature, he's using manipulation. Everything in your situation is toxic for everyone thanks to your parents.

What Girls Said 1

  • I think you have already asked this question many times.
    That makes me think that you are sort of obsessed with your siblings' life as well. It doesn't matter what your brother and sister are feeling. All that matters is that you need to get away from that toxic environment.

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