Guys, my boyfriend almost broke up with me because I'm to clingy. now I plan on getting out of the clinginess. What should be my plan of action?

I've been really clingy. and my boyfriend almost broke up with me because of that. Now I plan to change my ways so that won't be happening.

we talked, I cried, he cried. He has so much things happening with his life that a clingy girlfriend is not what he needed. we did end up making up. but I was hurt that he was just gonna break up like that without giving me a chance first to change,
I've always been honest with how I'm feeling. and I make it a point to ask if me and him are okay. he would say we are okay. then when he suddenly dropped the bomb on me I was devastated. I wanted him to tell me if there's anything wrong in our relationship so that we could work on it and be a team. since I've always told him if I feel something that hurts me or concerns me. I wanted him to do the same thing so that we both have a clue on what's going on.

We didn't break up. I promised to stop being clingy and I ask him to promise to always tell me how he feels and be honest with each other before things gets worse.
So I made it my goal to change my ways. What should be my plan of action? I've been reading a lot on how to stop being clingy. There's a lot to read out there. so I'm hoping to get some insight from guys.

thank you. I've started my stop being clingy plan. it's really definitely hard. Im hoping that it gets easier everyday.
but my main concern now what if I slip up one day and that was it.
he's very loving and caring. and I'm afraid that I'd just suddenly go back to my old ways without even realizing it and before I know it. it's over and there's no going back.
thanks for the replies.
im a stage 5 clinger. that's what it's called. now I'm working to be WAS a stage 5 clinger. right now I'm trying not to bombard his phone with texts and calls. it's really hard every time I would look at my phone. I would get an inch to call him or text him. before I would call him probably 10x within a couple hours if I don't hear from him. or I would text him so much that all you would see are rows of my messages. today I didn't text or call him and waited for him to call


Most Helpful Guy

  • You are just my kind of girl, I am also tooo clingy because of my past relationship, where she dumped me. My girl knows that but the thing is being clingy is okay to certain point but as you know too much of something is not good for anything. So, please try to occupy yourself in doing something, ofcourse you will always have him on your mind but just do something. You are a great lover, you have shown him what true love is.""Let him miss you instead of you missing him"". I know it's hard to follow but think like """I'm proud, that he got got such a caring, loyal and beautiful girl like me. Why should I always text him or call him? Okay, let's give him some space, let him miss me. Make him feel what missing really is""""" think like this and CERTAINLY everything will be fine. I'm feeling proud for giving advice to such a great lover (you). Stay cool... stay loved. 😍

    • #Since you have updated the question.
      At the end of everyday, think what all you have done that day (things with your boyfriend) just rectify if there are any mistakes. Be cautious since it's hurting him (being clingy). He will stay with you life long no need to worry about temporary happiness (he might be busy with his things)

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What Guys Said 4

  • It won't be easy. It sounds like insecurities in your relationship.

    One thing to do is spend a little bit of time apart so you can have a chance to miss each other and then when you meet up he won't mind the clingy (physical) stuff you do.

    Try to watch how many times you ask him if you guys are okay. Just be in the moment and enjoy him.

  • It's easy to write that
    you'll become less clingy naturally when finally with a guy that offers more security, a better match then this asocial jerk that is using you and everything is your fault. Not a life of happiness when always trying to correct self, often the fault/cause of others!

  • 1. Don't be too emotionally dependant. It's fine to need hold from your partner - but within means. You should still be capable of handling your life on your own - especially during times where he has a lot going on in his life for himself. It's tricky to find the right balance though.

    2. Have your own private life. Have friends you occasionally do something with, etc.

  • Stop being so clingy. Try to catch yourself whenever you're being clingy and stop yourself.


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