Is it the worst when you can't have the one you once loved/cared about back?

Say you dated but you did something wrong and now they want nothing to do with you. Then they become the 'one that got away'. Does it suck?

Anyone gone through this?

  • Yes
    95%(19)80%(44)Vote71%(25)
  • No
    5%(1)20%(11)Vote29%(10)
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Most Helpful Guy

  • Yes worst pain in the world, I still can't get over it :(

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What Guys Said 15

  • I put "no" but on a long-term perspective. Over the short-term, it can feel like the worst thing imaginable.

    In my case I lost a fiancee the night after I celebrated with my friends that we were getting married. It was just one bad argument that I didn't have the maturity at the time to stop which spiraled out of control, though we had that tendency to argue a lot so it wasn't just that.

    It's not exactly an easy thing to recover from. In my case, I was at a stage where she was all I wanted in life. She became the embodiment of all my hopes and dreams for the future. And we even promised to each other that we'd never leave each other, even if one of us grew deathly ill. I took that promise a bit too much for granted.

    After recovering though, I met the one I would actually marry some years later, and also after maturing a bit. We never argued, and in hindsight I'm glad that we broke things off because I would have been far worse with her than with my now-wife.

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  • Sucks hard for a few reasons

    For one, you are left with the guilt of doing whatever you did to drive them away

    Second, they never gave you redemption and that is probably why they become 'the one that got away' they leave you with the guilt to hold on to --> which personally I don't agree with

    --> if one wants to leave, there is no need to leave a negative ball of guilt within her/him. Go gracefully --> and if he did, I don't think it would bother you that much --> which is the idea on his part... to leave you with suffering

    Best thing is to let them go, let the suffering go and they lose all power over you BUT they may never know it hahah

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  • YES
    at first
    BUT
    then others see you free & clear and now you find a MUCH BETTER MATCH that requires less work to make it stick!
    My life changed 100% for the better when I let go of all the crap I accepted in the past, thus a major rejections was almost immediately replaced with an angel that changed everything, thank God!

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  • It was a long distance relationship and she was very busy (a week could easily go by and not one message) in a long distance relationship, you need to talk constantly in order to keep the relationship alive and well. Well to much time had passed and I needed that attention, I waited awhile, kept putting it off thinking one more day, one more day, one more day. I couldn't take it anymore. I wrote her a long filled soft message about how much I appreciated her and what she meant to me, but she was just way to busy (I would of even accepted 1 message a week for a long time). I let her down easy and I was honest, that she didn't have time for me and she agreed. It was hard on the both of us, I changed my online name and picture, I tried to make it easy in that sense for her I think, didn't want her to have to see my name or loom at my picture. It was so very hard I still regret it to this day. I check up on her as friends now, I dont think she knows its me.

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  • Well, after 27 years together, as a family, my ex ghosted my ass like I was nothing. It's pretty hard to deal with, I've tried everything I can to work things out, but I'm guessing she found herself another guy out there, and replaced what was missing from our life with his help.

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  • My wife told me to choose between her and the last slice of pizza.
    I chose the pizza. Relationship ended :(
    But the pizza was worth it.

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  • No because it wasn't meant to be

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  • I don't know if this counts, we never actually dated, it was LDR. she proposed me online and we exchanged I love you msgs, good morning, good night msgs etc, we talked on the phone and now suddenly she's vanished,,, feels bad. I wonder why people do that.

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  • I feel like a broken record...
    YOU CANNOT NEGOTIATE ATTRACTION OR DESIRE. Again. Just move on. It's either there or it isn't, all the wishing and pining is not going to change it.

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  • Nah!! Find someone better who can understand my mistakes... Help me be a better person than just dump me and enjoy her life

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  • yeah it sucks until you find someone even better. There's always someone better.

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  • Learn from it or repeat it it's your choice.

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  • You had your shot right? It'd be worse if you didn't.

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  • it sucks because you may forget that person after a while but it's still in the back of your head and you kinda think to much about what it could have been or so on especially if you were never fully given a chance

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  • I think it's even worse when someone you like screws you over and is clearly in the wrong then kicks you to the curb like it was your fault.

    I had that happen with a girl who was a sociopath and it hurt like hell. Made me feel like I was walking on eggshells with her the whole time and that everything was my fault, especially if she acted a certain way.

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What Girls Said 6

  • No. It is not a bad thing. or the worst thing ever. It means you're not meant to be together. And It means if you cared or loved someone that much, someone who isn't right for you and for your life, you can love the right person more than you loved him/her. Think how big your heart is, and how passionate and affectionate you are when you love someone. I went through a break up and felt this but I came to conclusion that i am fortunate to have a big heart which is capable of loving, and which is not selfish.

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  • Yes, i've been there once, I was still young though, and honestly, IT'S BETTER because i would never be happy with that person like I am now.

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  • I had the worst heartache after it happened to me over a year ago. It was some of the worst pain, if not the worst, I've ever been through in my life. It changed me a lot and so now I'm having problems being able to trust my current boyfriend.

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  • I don't view anyone as the one that got away. After a breakup , my feelings fade and I no longer view him as the " one". The " one" is the guy I AM with , not a guy I WAS with.

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  • it is not the worst, that's a common thing inlife

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  • Sharita Scarver
    334-210-1427
    Gina Chapis
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