So there's this guy i have a thing for, and he might like me too. There problem is that he's 1 8years older than me im 20 and weight about 220lb😞 so i obese. I've never been in a relationship before because I've always thought that i dont deserve love, that im too fat. So i always push them away. Deep down im extremely self conscious about my body but i really do like this guy. Anybody gone through the same thing? What should i do?
Most Helpful Guy
I've not been through it, but I want to offer some thoughts. You are fat, but that doesn't mean no one would want to be with you. Every day you see fat people with thin partners. You have a choice and you are choosing to let it dictate your behavior. If you are pushing men away, they must be interested. I would think that would be a positive for you. Trust me when I say that you are nowhere near being alone. I've been with a number of women who don't want the lights on, or they have to get under the covers before the man comes in the room. There are plenty of men who love big women. You are ruining your life over this. You over think and get into a worse depression by doing so. Are you a good person? Are you mature and use common sense? Have a good heart? I could ask more, but my point is that if you are those things, you may be a great women to be with. Give your self a chance. If you fail with someone, don't make that your reason to stop again. We all have those kind of things happen. Nobody lives without those relationships that go bad, or they just don't click with the other person, etc. If everybody let that stop them, we'd have a lot less babies born. Believe, really believe in your heart that you are these things and that you have a lot to offer a man. I know you have a lot of fear and don't want to do it, but if you never do, you will definitely never be with a man and that is not what you want. We choose to be happy or sad. I mean that you can choose to let things bring you down and be miserable or you can chose to not let the bumps in the road dictate your life. You can do this if you put your mind to it and start thinking about the good things about you and what you bring to a relationship. by the way... I've never let a woman who does the things I mentioned above bother me. If they are uncomfortable, I have no problem doing it their way. If you allow it, you will meet a good man who really doesn't care what you look like because it's what is in your heart that really matters. I hope I've helped a little.2
Most Helpful Girl
I am double my partners weight... he's underweight.. I'm overweight. What a great combo right? :) you do deserve love even if you don't think you do based on your body alone. Who are you as a person? There's a reason this man is attracted to you and your body is part and parcel with your mind. If he didn't like ALL of you he wouldn't be showing interest or engaging you. Just put yourself out there. Confidence is sexy and tbh you will get people who will knock you back but that's because THEY have the problem not you. If you live your life and are trying to be healthy and working on you then you can't punish yourself. It's a long road to self love... :( but good luck1