How do I tell him to stop sending sexual messages after we slept together?

OK, so I'm currently seeing this guy. We had several dates and on the 4th we slept together. Since then, his communication has changed... we still exchange normal conversation but then he always turns it into something sexual. I'm not saying this to brag, but I'm very confident in bed and he really enjoyed it, but outside of the bedroom and with what I'm looking for, is something more meaningful. So yeah, it might boil down to him just wanting sex (a possibility). I guess he thinks, because we slept together, sending these messages is now part of the territory. Well it ain't for me, and it's cringey.

Don't get me wrong, I enjoy these sort of messages but only with someone I'm completely 100% about. It's too early for me to find his messages appealing and it's putting me off him. I'm thinking of just pulling the plug, and not bother contacting him anymore or is there some kind of way I can phrase this in a lighthearted way?

I think there's potential with me and him, we get on really well but it's still early days.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Try telling him to "save it for the bedroom, Tiger." Turn it into something where you want him to save all his energy for the next time you guys are going to sleep together.

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    • Good advice! Thanks.

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    • It's not about proving anything to me. It'd just confirm if we're on the same page.

Most Helpful Girl

  • Do you want to stop contacting him overall or do you simply want him to stop sending sexual messages? I don't understand what exactly you want.

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    • How do I tell him to stop sending sexual messages after we slept together?

    • Stopping any contact would be a last resort

    • Tell him that you would prefer to talk about other stuff instead of constantly talking sex.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • Honestly, if you still wanna see him you should just tell him that you don't want those sorts of messages that often. Guys are logical, he'll be cool with it.

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  • Just telll him directly.

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What Girls Said 1

  • This little Convo has to End with Guns and Roses, by You... Changing the Subject Quickly whenever he Sends "His Very Not so Best." it can be a Turn Off.
    However, if even going to Bed is what he Really is after and Nothing even More in Store, then him and his 'Sexual Messages' would Need to go "Bye Bye" for this is the Fastest way on any given Day to Shoot down a Potential Partnership.
    Have a Talk with him, if you Feel he might be a good Deal. If not, end it before any Lame Dick Duck Excuses on your own Part.
    Good Luck. xx

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