Am I wasting my time on him? Is he really a jerk?

I have a long history with this guy, we went on plenty of dates, and did some stuff, I'm 18, and a virgin, he's 23, but I told him I only wanted to lose it if I am in a relationship, and I told him why, and he told me he really likes me but he just wants to have fun, but he kept going for me anyways, acting like we were in a relationship, buying me dinner, holding hands, kiss on the cheeks etc... then one day he came over, we talked for hours... and we went to my bedroom, then he got up and left before much could happen, which was like 3 months ago, and hasn't texted me since. Well except for the day after that he asked me to go shopping and I waited all day for him to come, and he never came. Anyways there is a reason I really liked him, he helped me get through a really bad situation I was in, but within the last two months he has been flirting with a girl like crazy that he know I never liked... even though he always tells me he doesn't like her. I'm confused because even though he doesn't text me he's still very flirty with me in class, and sometimes he talks to me a lot, but sometimes he doesn't. Last week I was in class, there was a seat open right beside me, and he went to the other side of the room and sat by himself even though he glared right at me. but a few days ago we ended up going out for dinner again somehow, it just kinnda happened after class and he opened up to me a lot. Anyways I was getting upset about how he keeps confusing me so I went clubbing recently to help me not think about him, and ended up getting a hickey from someone... and I know that's gross but that's what happened, and he kept looking at me in class then came up to me after class and asked me about it and touched it. Well I'm in a group project with him and today he never showed up to work with me even though we needed to get it done... im just confused because when I'm with him he's the nicest guy, but then he does little things like that. what should I do?
He did tell me recently the reason he left was because it took him awhile to realize it but he respects how I said I want to lose it to someone I care about... but he still flirts with me then stops talking to me all the sudden over and over again so I'm confused.


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What Guys Said 1

  • He's stupid. I would've convinced you that anal and oral don't count and went from there...


What Girls Said 1

  • He told you he just "wants fun", so he's trying to manipulate you any way he can with the nice attitude and such, to see what he can get without actually being in a relationship with you. So if he doesn't offer the relationship, don't assume anything from his behaviour and don't do anything with him assuming it will become a relationship after. He'll keep persisting if he thinks he can get you to sleep with him, so make it clear you won't if he doesn't want a relationship with you.


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