My friend keeps changing her mind, but I like her. What do I do?

I've known this girl for a couple years, but we were never really close friends. About a month ago, she got drunk and told me she had a crush on me. We talked about this when she was sober, and she said she was confused but that her gut told her we should just be friends. But then she kept texting me random things and acting flirty around me. We talked again because she found out I told my friend that her behavior made me feel weird, and once again she said she was confused but that her gut told her we should be friends. One day she texted me and asked if I wanted to hang out. We spent the day together and ended up watching a movie in my room. I didn't make a move or anything because I wasn't sure what to make of her behavior. After this, we had another talk and I said that I had enjoyed hanging out with her and that I would like to do it again. She agreed, but said she couldn't be in a relationship, so we should leave things open-ended. A couple days later, she said she felt anxious about our situation and that we should be friends because she couldn't think of anywhere this would go except for a relationship and she didn't want that. A few days after that, she invited me over to her room, came onto me pretty strongly, and we wound up cuddling on her bed. The next day, she texted me to apologize, and I said she was being unfair to me. We ended up talking and she said she thought we should be more than friends. We kissed and cuddled, but she had somewhere to be so it didn't last long. A couple days after that, she told me basically the same thing she had before: that this was making her anxious and she didn't want a relationship. She said she didn't know herself well enough, but that she wanted to be friends and hang out a lot. We talked again a couple days later and she said we should be friends but that she didn't know how to act right now because she feels bad, so we should spend some time apart. I like her, and any advice/explanation would be helpful.


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What Girls Said 1

  • She is playing with you. She is using you as an emotional tampon and you can't even realize that.

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What Guys Said 2

  • Quite simply she keeps changing her mind. It also sounds like she is an overthinker. We can easily overthink ourselves into a hole and make bad decisions cause of it.
    My advice is to either ask her out. Or firmly tell her that you want to try taking your freindship to the next level and try dating. Be firmer, don't let her decide everything.
    Flatter her when you talk with her. Tell her that you want to get to know her better. Make dating sound like a good idea and stay positive. Right now it sounds like she is controlling everything. You want her go get her talk to her and tell you how much you like her and what your feeling for her.

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  • Get rid of her. People like her aren't worth any time to waste on.

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