Good guys being alone?

why is so that all good guys are mostly alone and, all the jerks and perverts are happily dating?

  • girls like jerks
    Vote A
  • good guys are too shy
    Vote B
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04

Most Helpful Guy

  • The dichotomy is not between good guys and jerks. That would suggest all good guys in this world end up lonely and rejected by the opposite sex and that's far from true.

    The dichotomy is simply between guys who understand how to attract the opposite sex (either naturally or learned) and guys who don't.

    One of the most common characteristics of those who fail to attract the opposite sex is that they overvalue their own personality traits while simultaneously significantly devaluing the traits of everyone who is successful.

    An example is a very unattractive girl (in every possible way) thinking guys are only interested in women who look like models while simultaneously thinking her antisocial personality is the greatest in the world.

    If these "good guys" want to fix their tendencies to be alone, it helps to pay attention to what actually attracts the opposite sex. It tends to come down to more outward qualities like demeanor and physical appearance along with social skills and charisma. Attraction doesn't reward those who simply want it the most or think they care the most.

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    • For a guy especially, a certain type of charisma is arguably just as important or more than physical appearance (though it also affects your outward appearance).

      A guy who has it in spades will "attract" both sexes (not always sexually, of course, but people will be charmed of both sexes and will look up to him and want to tag along).

      This skill is something any guy can potentially develop to some degree or another.

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