I and this guy started dating three months ago, met online. We both knew that we were looking for something serious, but we had sex early, and it ended up as being casual-regular sex, and hanging out, doing stuff like eating out, going to movie theaters etc.
After 2 months, I told him that this is really tiring me because I dont know what the direction of this relationship is and dating others at the same time is wasting too much time as I am ready to settle and so I would like to date him seriously and do fun stuff outside and be exclusive because we share a lot of details and we have a lot in common hobbies etc, and I like him as a person as he is kind. He told me that he will be moving away to be close to his family and looking for jobs and this may end up being a long distance in 4-5 months and asked me if it does not bother me. I said it does not bother me and we can try until then and see what happens as we both are 27 and would like to get married within a year. I told him to think through and that I will give him space. And if he doesn't call me in a week to take me out to a date, it means he doesn't want anything. If he calls, then it means we are dating seriously. So he called me after 5 days and we had a nice dinner date, where he paid. Then he called again for the next week, and we went to a museum, and then beach to walk. Both did not end up with sex. In the second one he stayed with me watched a movie but didn't initiate sex. we just cuddled.
Now i still see him online on okcupid every other day, sometimes once a week, sometimes 2-3 times on different days. I am wondering what he is doing, and why he still has those accounts and getting online, and if he is playing with me.
Any ideas? You can ask questions to clarify certain things in this relationship on the comments.
Most Helpful Guy
From a relationship coaches perspective, he is playing you all the way. First of all, he didn't just make a decision to move away at the drop of a hat and yet he conveniently shared that with you after you two had sex and you told him you wanted to be exclusive. Stating that he wants a long distance relationship is nice for him because he can have you when he wants you but do other things (online dating to meet other girls, for instance) the other times. This is very textbook, frankly.
And if I may say, talking about marriage with someone that has been inconsistent at best isn't healthy, though I suspect you know that already.1
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