Why does society put so much pressure on men to be players and f*** women all the time?

Lot of men are pushing me into getting a Tinder and I am not about that life. I had it before and I got no good matches. I hardly even got any matches. What makes all these people think that I will get it again? Getting a Tinder might just damage my self-esteem. I don't even have a Facebook these days because I have become so private.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Don't listen to others, stay loyal to what you want and what makes you feel good. Some people like Tinder, and some are all the time connected to Facebook. Some of us don't/are not. For me all these social websites are very superficial and loss of time that I can spend much better with my friends, or by doing something else that I enjoy. It seems to me that you simply prefer to spend your time more quality. There is nothing wrong about it. Plus it is much better to meet people in real life (of course if you want to meet new people) than strangers who try to 'sell' themselves online.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Dude you're 20 years old. Stop complaining and just go have fun holy shit. Go get laid and stop taking yourself so seriously.

    "Getting a Tinder might just damage my self-esteem."
    You're being a fucking pansy dude lmao. It might hurt my self esteem. Ohhhh noooo.

    When I was single I'd get rejected all the time. Chicks would say I'm disgusting and vulgar. Then other chicks worshiped the ground I walked on. Who do you think I spent more time with?

    Tinder is literally the easiest shit ever. I wrote a tinder guide a while back on my old account.
    www.girlsaskguys.com/.../a27884-the-definitive-tinder-guide-for-the-sexually-inclined

    Might do you some good.

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Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 14

  • You don't have to be a player and have sex all of the time if you don't want to. Just because everyone else does doesn't mean you should too.

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  • They are just pressuring you to conform to what is considered to be socially normal these days. Maybe they consider you not being interested in tinder as a knock against their own chosen lifestyle. Maybe they think you are lonely and they want to see you happy and putting yourself out there to meet a nice girl.

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  • Because sleeping around has basically become a "manly" thing and society thinks you should want to constantly "conquer" women.

    I'm glad you aren't like that though. I hate that some guys have that mentality :/

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  • follow your heart don't be lead by the nose. most girls avoid players

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  • i had tinder and I didn't use it for sex , I wanted to meet guys and date em. don't use tinder if it damages your self esteem. people judge by a picture , I would have probably rejected my boyfriend on tinder if I saw one of his pictures. but I met him personally and im crazy in love with him. I don't like guys who think it's cool to see women as sexual objects and use them fir their own pleasure , its horrible. really. good you're not like that

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  • Society tries to push people to do a lot of things that are totally out of character for some people.

    I'm the sort of person who lives by my own standards, so I make my own choices. I don't do something because society views it as the norm or because other people assume it's best for me. That would mean they are controlling my life, how I live. I prefer to be responsible for my own life , decisions and choices

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  • well i say dont buy into it. i agree with all the reasons given by otheres here as to why you shouldn't. and if you forget all the reasons then just know its for your own benefit to pursue meanigful connections instead of hitting on every girl even if you becime good at it because you will certainly never gain anything worthwhile from it.

    i hope you will stay one of the good guys cause the damage done by the typical guy is unimaginable and very hard to undo.

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  • No idea... but it's crazy, you're right.

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  • They don't, not at all. It's bad considered to be a player.

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  • Go with your gut. Don't let anyone tell you what to do.

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  • Don't listen to them, keep doing what you are already doing! Don't listen to them. The right girl will come along without knowing it

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  • Men make the rules.

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  • it's hard to meet people the old way now because everyone seems so addicted to their phones and the magical things it holds. it's sad but true

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  • I'm not sure. I guess because women were harder to give it up back in the old days, thus making it a fun/hard game that men saw only the "skilled" could break down girls walls in olden times. Also, men are naturally competitive; due to hormones. And society brainwashing makes it worse.

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What Guys Said 8

  • Well which guy would you rather be?

    (GUY A) Sleeps with a bunch of women and doesn't have to wait for sex or pay for dates.

    OR

    (GUY B) Only gets to sleep with a few women and the women he does sleep with espected him to pay for dates and wait a month for sex even though those same girls were willing to sleep with a bunch guys from the GUY A category for free on the first date.

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  • It isn't politically correct to mention, and you are supposed to make believe it isn't true, but it's obvious that millennia of evolution has designed men and women to play certain roles in procreation. Women are physiological designed to produce children and raise them. Men are physiologically designed to plant their seeds and go. The more women men an impregnate, the more successful the continuation of the human race. It's no different than with every other animal species on the planet. We like to think we are "beyond" that, that we are "evolved" and somehow living in post evolutionary times. But we are still creatures of the animal world and still need to produce a sufficient amount of offspring if we want out human race to survive. So it's completely normal for men to feel like men, and have the urges that men do, and women to feel like women and for them to each play their separate and different roles in the procreation process for which they are obviously physiologically designed. Having said that, will every individual have the same amount of natural drive to fulfill those roles? Of course not. Again comparing with any other animal species, some have more drive and are more prolific procreators than others. But as a whole, instinct wins out over intellect and that's why we are still here.

    The conflicts develop not because people naturally want to fulfill their instinctual roles, but because our society has adopted a faddish belief that there is something wrong with it and we are not supposed to acknowledge the truth about the roles of men and women. So people become conflicted. They feel guilty about feeling their natural feelings and wonder why they don't comport with the politically correct narrative of the day. It makes them feel isolated and intimidated into going along with the charade. That's the aim of the politically correct movement that comes up with this claptrap.

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  • Society is progressively becoming worse, so it's normal to think anything different is weird. Just focus on God, yourself, your family, good friends, and school/career/dreams. The right one will come along. I wish somebody would of told me that instead of listening to the get laid parade.

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  • Tinder isn't just about being a player... it's about meeting people. Why would you think it's about playing?

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  • Society doesn't put pressure, it's the women that force men to behave this way.
    Why would a man be in a relationship when women feel like being entitled to everything?

    A relationship is a lose-lose situation for a man, same goes for marriage.

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    • Do you really think it's rational to say that the issue is every woman in the world and not yourself? Yes clearly the issue is literally every single woman in the world. It's clearly not you. Let's go with that logic.

      All of your friends that are men. Are they to be described in the same personality? No right? That concept is not gender specified. There are a lot of different types of women out there.

      I'm in a relationship and I'm happy as fuck. What exactly am I losing? I'm not out spending my money on her all the time. I'm a broke university student. She doesn't expect me to.

      I mean there are millions of marriages out there in which men are very happy in. My dad being one of them. They still act like teenagers around each other. That says something.

      If you're already this far deluded at the age of 20 then you are going to be very lonely. Women are not even going to want to be around you.

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    • @Chico_brah And i've been in the army myself, what's your point? I also pay for my own shit, I just don't bow down and worship the vagina like you do.

    • Bet you were on suicide watch lmao. MOS and unit?

  • There is no oressure. Its just that its a fun and the most enjoyable lifestyle for the majority of men so they strive fir it

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  • Mainly for profit.

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  • I hate tinder myself, I have bad luck on there all the time.

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