Did I fuck up? How do I fix this?

So I have been dating this guy for a month, he recently got deployed and we have continued to keep talking. The whole deployment thing doesn't bother me because I have done it before. And we honestly have this great connection that I do not care about meeting someone else here just because he is gone... Yeah it sucks that I won't be able to see him, but I am fine because of our chemistry.

Well I decided to go out and get a little too drunk with my family and friends last night... He is in a different country of course so our time differences suck!! He was telling me he missed me and for some drunk reason I went off on him and told him he had to trust me.. (IDK WHYYYYY bc that wasn't even the conversation that we were talking about) I told him I wouldn't put up with him treating me like shit (WHICH HE DOES NOT!), and just drunken nonsense. He told me that he hated me drinking like that and that I needed to stop! For some drunk reason I then sent him a screenshot of a guy that "apparently" had gotten my number. (WHICH THE WHOLE TIME I WAS TELLING THIS GUY ABOUT MY DUDE AND HE WAS TELLING ME ABOUT HIS EX--). We are so honest with each other that I honestly think my drunk self did that... He asked me to screenshot the conversation and send it to him, which I did! He then said goodbye and I haven't heard back from him yet! I have tried texting and apologizing to him... even called him (but he was asleep) to apologize, I did leave him a voicemail... My question is, how do I fix this? Especially since he is deployed and in another country. I know that I honestly fucked up!


Most Helpful Guy

  • Well I was on the receiving end of that drunk call before. However i feel like you guys are tougher than I was when I heard it being said to me by someone I really loved. However she meant it, and left me. Even thougj i felt like we had great chemistry. What went through my mind was where did I mess up and how could I fix it. That she told me all that for a reason. I feel like he may be questioning that too, but at the same time he says that you should stop drinking like that. It may feel like he is making you do what he wants but maybe you should stop, at least while he is gone. It will give him the comfort, because he is not there with you and getting plastered like that and telling him what you did while he is not there. It is only going to make him go crazy thinking what is going on. My girlfriend and I were long distance as well for 3 years, she started spending time with some guy until 3am and he got all touchy with her apparently. She was honest and told me about but just because she told me didn't make me feel any better. It made me trust her, but it made me go crazy knowing there was some guy doing this to my girlfriend, like I wanted to be there anddo what this guys was doing. also that this other guy felt like he could just do what he wants. It isn't a good feeling, it can drive you crazy, give him some time and let him know you do care. Just keep in mind that even though they are your actions, they can affect other people. I always forgave her because i knew i could trust her. However she never forgave me for getting anxious about it haha.


Most Helpful Girl

  • lol well lesson learnt! Don't drink out again! I'd keep trying to make things right and tell him you won't ever do that again. You aren't boyfriend and girlfriend yet, you didn't sleep with the guy and you didn't say anything too terrible so its not too bad of damage. I think if you really care and want to make it right then you should continue to try and do that. But you also have to remember that people need a little time.

    • She said he treats her like shit. which he doesn't but to him. he would have thought maybe this is her way of expressing how she feels in the relationship. likewise he is very hurt if he hadn't responded back.

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    • I personally feel like he would have been hurt. unless this isn't the first time this happen, it shouldn't be a big deal for either of them

    • He is hurt I'm sure. I just think its not something that should end what they have going on. They haven't even become boyfriend and girlfriend yet and I think they should at least make it to there. It could be something really good.

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What Guys Said 2

  • I feel like you just created a trust issue for him. it probably was really hard for him and he needs time away from you

  • If that were me, you'd be blocked and deleted for ever. What you may not realize is all of what you said while drunk tells a story about your past, your behavior in the past, how you see men and relationships, how you see yourself and it also communicates the potential that you have baggage and possibly bad relationships in the past. it also gives a switched on guy a big clue about the number of guys...

    If the guy is on deployment, he has a lot to worry about and the last thing he will put up with is drama.

    Sometimes you can't fix what's broken in life and just have to accept the consequences.

    • Ain't gonna lie, she fucked up big time. if that happen to me, I would be literally hurt.

What Girls Said 0

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