I am dating multiple military men. However, I have no interest in forming any deep, meaningful bonds with them. I want to make them feel like they're the only person I'm dating. It seems to be working. I have no desire to form any sort of relationship with them. I want to lead them on, support them, make them feel great, then cut all ties with them abruptly. Why am I doing this? I feel great hurting and putting supposedly "strong", "stoic" and "patriotic" men down. It makes me feel empowered and strong when I do this.
I have no idea why I am acting this way. I don't feel that romance is important to me. To me, emotions make you prone to vulnerability and weakness, it makes you less capable of taking on any challenges. I guess I am insensitive to other people's feelings.
- Yes.Vote A
- No.Vote B
- Other.Vote C
Most Helpful Guy
You feel empowered because you like to see/feel someone broken because of you. To be honest, I went through a phase in my life where I had similar tendencies. I had no remorse for anyone because I didn't feel anything anymore. No one gave a shit about me when I was the nice guy but when I was a dick, all of a sudden the ball kinda found itself in my court if you can understand that. I had control and because I didn't give a shit I had the freedom to do whatever I wanted.
But I hurt other people because I was hurt. Those people had everything I wanted. A family, friends, food to eat every day, a solid future. They had no idea how easily and without hesitation I'd have killed to be one of them. I got obsessive over these things.
This is truly a terrible thing to do. Those people give up a lot in order to be in the military and a few of the ones I know are already emotionally damaged. It's not easy to have any kind of relationship when you get shipped off to a warzone thousands of miles away all the time. I'm sure there's always the fear of the girl leaving and then they come home maybe after losing friends and because they were dating a bitch like you they find out that they don't have anyone. I mean, what your doing is messing with people who are already in a weakened mental state.
Please try to change yourself. It sucks not feeling anything. It's even worse than dealing with all the pain from the past and the present. You become a shell of who you really are and what meaning can life have if you don't at least try to have a connection with someone? Doesn't have to be romantic. You should surround yourself with new people. People who are better than you but would never want to make you feel that way. Learn from them, start a career. And learn to love people. You can't play the worlds smallest violin to yourself forever. I mean you can, but do you really want to live the rest of your life making everyone as miserable as you? Change, let yourself feel. It's not easy but I swear it's worth it.1
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