Should I dump a guy who wants to split the bill the next time we go out?

I'm testing the guy I'm dating by offering to pay for my own meal on a date. If he accepts to let me pay for my own, does it mean that this guy is frugal and doesn't see a future with me?

He has paid for all of the dates we have gone on so far except for one. He told that he was broke after he had to get his car fixed and so I gave him back $20. I'm suspecting that I'm dealing with a cheap guy after that one instance.

Your thoughts?

Updates:
Note: he asked for the $20 back. After he already paid.

1|1

Most Helpful Guy

  • You're planning on "testing" a guy by intentionally telling him something that you don't really mean (I. e. lying to him) to see if he fits your sexist view of how a man should behave. That's terribly disingenuous and manipulative of you and you'd both do well to go your own separate ways.

    6|7
    0|0

Most Helpful Girl

  • Yes, so he can find someone who doesn't play petty mind games.

    It's 2017, if a guy accepts your offer to pay it's because we live in a more modern time where people don't apply to the same roles.

    7|19
    3|0
    • Not entirely disagreeing with the last part, but is it possible that he might accept the offer because he's greedy and cheap?

    • I doubt it, otherwise he'd expect you to pay the whole thing.

    • I am sorry @RJGraveyTrain But I could not share my thoughts cause she closed it. @Asker You are so immature to be playing games you offered and he accepted. Not everyone is rich js He should not waste a penny on you smdh.

What Guys Said 72

  • Lol I'm sure this is a troll attempt, but still, yes, dump him, I'm sure he doesn't want to date a gold digger.

    6|9
    0|0
    • My thoughts exactly. :)

    • Show All
    • @lizziepooh03 True. The problem with this troll is that it's too obvious? Good trolling is subtle.

    • Yes. That was definitely their problem. You picked it out right away and called them on it. I picked it out but would not have called them on it but did because you already did.

      However, I am not sure if that is necessarily a good thing. Don't get me wrong, I think that it is great when a troll is caught. However, accusing someone of something is a bit more of a slippery slope than I can handle.

      You did it exceptionally well. You accused them of being a troll but then answered their question in a genuine, sincere and devastating way.

      I have to say, it was quite beautiful. You caught them in their own gotcha.

      It does not get better than that. :) And it made it easy for me to follow.

  • Your the reason girls​ don't get the respect they want. If saving money where he can is bad to you by all means please let this guy go as he doesn't need you in his life.

    4|8
    0|0
  • I think you should dump him... please... do him the favor of not having to be stuck with a gold digging entitled bitch like you :)
    Hey, thats how i weed out gold digging whores... i ask em to pay their way. its not like i can't... i just wanna know who just feel like just because they have a vagina... they should always go and get everything free. I dont believe in that shit.
    Speaking as a guy that has spent hundreds on dollars on single dates with girls that just wait for one instance, get offended, and poof... date over. No refund.

    Umm... no.. not no more.. so do this poor clueless guy a favor.. and dump him.

    2|5
    0|0
    • Wow lol. I was the one who offered to split the bill. Not him. I'm trying to see if he's a frugal, cheap ass guy who thinks he's entitled to getting free sex.

    • Show All
    • @Summerglo thanks for sticking up for me

    • @Summerglo Oh i agree, she's entitled to her opinion, until it becomes actions. Then its not just her anymore now is it? Now she is throwing someone else under the bus.
      so yea, speaking as a guy that has had to face that before and as someone whose opinion of good women was changed due to people like that... i'd rather not have her creating more. I was able to bounce back from it... this guy may not. So yea, this is me having my opinion... she should dump him. The rest of it, is just classification of what girls like her are called in the "receiving" world :)

      @Dog19 lol... i dont think she was talking to you.

  • I say dump him; you'd be doing him a big favor, ridding him of a shallow self-centered girl who just dates to use people.

    4|9
    0|0
    • Lol, What do you call a guy who expects a girl to take his balls deep inside of her, yet refuses to pay for a meal?

      Who's the user now? lol

    • Show All
    • *whether you choose to believe it or not.

    • @Summerglo ''What do sex toys have to do with the comparison of which gender desires sex more often than not''
      they dont buy them to just look at them. I am basing this off how frequent it is bought and the quantities which is a HUGE amount. Besides that, dont duck my other statement of women also adding up to about half of the porn accounts across all sites. Also, look for the buyers of adult films its actually pretty equal. Another thing, look at surveys that ask women how many times they take in sexual activities or masturbation, again equal. Bringing up actual stats is MUCH more reliable than just claiming it was hormones when we all have different levels. Again, what are you basing your opinion off of with guys not living with sex? I guess you never heard of retention? or guys who follow certain rules in Buddhism and Hinduism. Your claims are outlandish, and just have no proof and no, saying we have testosterone is not proof.

  • Good idea let him go so he can find someone who won't play games.

    2|11
    1|0
  • Lol sound like you failed his shit test. He gave you a chance to show you weren't shallow and could offer something when he's clearly worth more than you

    3|12
    2|0
  • Yes u should dump him. There is no future anyway if u are considering to dump him for something as stupid as that. Stop testing people with bullshit like that

    4|7
    0|0
    • Lol do u think the girls from the video are in the right. They are making fools out of themselves

  • This one time i tested a girl and left a bunch of dishes in the sink. Left the house dirty and fridge empty than went to work. When i got back home there was not a meal on the table set for me and dishes was still in the sink. When i confronted her about it. I was called sexist and told gender roles were bullshit. So i apologized. A few days later she wanted to go out on a date for dinner. So we went, after the meal the bill came. And we both sat awkwardly until i asked her if she was going to pay. She said that i was the guy and i was supposed to pay for meals. Thats how guys show they care for their ladies and it was the gentlemanly thing to do. I told her gender roles were bullshit shit. Im currently single. Moral of the story is...

    3|7
    1|0
  • So what are you doing for him exactly? I mean clearly you believe in traditional gender roles so your cooking for him right? Being submissive to him etc? Because other wise your being self centered and selfish. So which one is it? As for testing him, that's idiotically stupid but go for it if your going to offer to pay (instead of free loading) and then get pissed off about it you deserve to be alone. This is what communication is for to you know communicate and understand each other. Troll harder.

    2|1
    1|0
    • Of course. I would be more than happy to cook... As long as he's bringing something to the table.
      Nothing is free in this world. I don't know how much I need to reinforce that.

    • Show All
    • @Summerglo Why not? Because as I said their is over a hundred comments and that is not mentioning all the many replies I would have to go through that is why I asked her directly and she did not respond. That is what I am basing this off of. I don't see why that would be an issue. As for prostitution, if you are being paid for sex that is by definition prostitution. You are exchange goods for sex, that's how prostitution works. Why would a man buying a prostitute be worse then being a prostitute exactly? I am not saying either one is worse or better then the other and in fact pointed out I disapprove of sex being used in that way (several times if I am not mistaken).

    • @Summerglo im not saying the guy is right at all, but call it out when you see it. He is not the only ''parasite'' here.

  • I think he should dump you. You are judgmental based merely how you sound. With that said, i will be nice and suggest that couples before marriage should split all bills. The courting women and paying for everything is disrespectful to women. And in our credit debt society, frugal is a virtue.

    3|6
    2|0
  • Here we go again. Women want equal rights... except when it doesn't benefit them. You want equality in jobs, pay, etc... but the guy has to pay for dates, ask you out first, make all the first moves..
    I actually test women when I start to date them. If they don't at least pay for one of the 3 dates after our first date, I immediately stop dating them. I want someone willing to be a partner, not someone that is only out for a free meal.
    Do the guy a favor and dump him. It saves him from being with someone that is only with him for free meals, free items, and free nights out. He deserves someone that wants to be an equal partner in the relationship.

    1|4
    3|0
  • He should leave you. If he is willing to pay, there are literally thousands of girls out there for even average guys to get.
    You only value him as an ATM. You are the kind of woman that makes men not want marriage because we know you only value us for what you can get out of us financially. You have no loyalty to a person either, only to money.
    I hope every guy leaves you until you change your ways.
    You disgust me.

    3|4
    0|0
    • Please stop whining and man up. Cheap ass guys who think they're entitled to get free sex without putting the least bit of effort to give something in return disgust me.

    • Show All
    • Would you ever go out with someone without expecting to get laid in the end? i don't think so lol. Neither do 99.9% of guys walking on this planet would. I guess most guys are prostitute buyers I guess lol.

    • Sex on a first date? Heck no I wouldn't want that. Maybe after 1 to 3 months, depending on how well we got to know each other before dating. But right away? No, not for me.

  • He should dump your entitled ass, princess.

    4|11
    2|0
  • "I'm testing the guy"
    -By all means dump him. No one deserves to be tested.

    Also, why do you expect him to pay? Isn't this 2017 already? I thought you women wanted equal rights (which came with equal responsibilities)?

    3|4
    0|0
    • I expect him to pay because every guy I know pays for the dates he goes on with his girlfriend. Especially if he truly loves her. I'm questioning whether or not this guy just doesn't care enough about me to not want to spend a few $10 bills.

    • Show All
    • Thank you. Like I said, most guys don't think like that.

    • @OP^

  • Allow me to ask you this. How likely is it for a girl to ask a guy out that they wouldn't mind paying for? As for most guys that pay for girls, they aren't doing so to impress you. They are most trying to be a gentleman since they like you enough to ask you out on a date. If you, the girl were to ask a dude out, I highly doubt that would would expect him to pay for the first date, since you already like him. In my experience men must initiate all first dates with any woman that he is interested in. If a man pays for the woman to impress her on the date, he is going out with you for the wrong reason, and he made the mistake of not impressing you before the date, in which he would have had the chance for the woman to pay for her own time and enjoyment. Surely you would never expect a guy that you like to pay for you and himself, so since he did not impress you before the date, build up attraction between you two, appear to be a self respecting man that wouldn't waste time on an insignificant girl who expects the guy to pay for the date even when the odds of hooking up are hurting him by paying, you're going to expect him to pay for you every time. That's simply because you sense that he values you more than you value him. More experience dand self respecting men would never submit to paying for a woman that he would probably never see again for very obvious reasons. Women may or may not know this, but this is why women would only be inclined to pay for self respecting men, the men that they would actually like to see again. Same rules apply for both genders, and this is another reason why men pay for dates: to see the woman again. Unfortunately most men are at a disadvantage with many male/female double standards such as who gets to pay for dates. It is already highly unlikely that the girl would initiate a first date even if she is interested in someone, so why MUST a guy pay for your time just because he decides to initiate the date and treat you like the receptive woman that you are portraying yourself to be?

    0|0
    0|0
  • He's cheap because he's always paid. Great logic

    2|6
    0|0
    • To your​ update. He's young and doesn't have much money clearly. At least he tried to impress you with what he had.

  • You shouldn't even be dating if this is the kind of crap you pull. No wonder men are becoming more cautious of women.

    2|6
    0|0
  • Please do him a favor and dump him. He doesn't deserve a girl like you. Seriously. You're willing to dump a guy because he wants YOU to pay YOUR HALF? You're clearly a gold digger and this just shows it.

    2|5
    0|0
    • he wanted me to get a brazilian wax and expected me to pay for it. He ultimately did and then asked me to give him $20 back. Who's the gold digger now?

    • Show All
    • You are fucking brain dead I swear to god. Why in the hell did your mother not just swallow you and be done you worthless piece of shit. I love how you reported my comment as well lmao. Guess you can't handle the truth.

    • OP, you are so childish like really? She only disagreed with your opinion and you're acting like a 2 year- old throwing a tantrum when mom takes his candy away. Just grow up and realize that not everyone is going to side with you and it doesn't make them any less stupid than you are.

  • You sound just like my fucking ex.

    4|5
    0|0
  • I think bills should be split when dating... especially the first few. It also shows the woman isn't "cheap" or freeloading. Or some of the other famous things women say about guys, "putting forth an effort", "serious",

    1|4
    0|0
    • At what point should the guy start paying for the dates?

    • honestly i dont think a guy should be expected to pay for dates in this day and age. women in their 20's make more money than men on average anyways but thats besides the point. Why do you even want him to pay anyways? i mean that makes you sound like the cheap one. you are a working woman i assume, which means you must take responsibility. its not the 1950's where women didn't work. if you can both pay just pay. why dont you want to be independant. You may like the tradition of a man paying but its really just unfair to him. and this trend of bill splitting really isn't going anywhere soon, infact its only going to become more common place.

    • @Mr-Kabuki Well said. Thanks for saying it for me! :)

  • I was going to troll you but,

    the fact that he has paid for all of the dates but one and sounds like he did because you paid him back because he was broke and need the money. and you want to end it because he wasn't able and it's not like he didn't want to but unable to provide your part of the check. you sound pretty ungreatful to me. just sayin

    and can I ask you a question? why hasn't he ended with you?

    2|4
    0|0
    • I just took this as a sign that he's just frugal and cheap af. I could be wrong, but that's why I want to see how it goes next time.

    • Show All
    • done with this shit

    • Dxmn! This got heated real quick. Lol!
      Some good points though.

  • i dont think guys should have to pay on every single date. i mean jesus.

    2|7
    0|0
    • Then guys should be fine with not having sex for longer than a few dates.

    • Show All
    • @MusicMayhem just sounds like it is all on your terms. What you want to pay for, where you want to go, oh and sex when you feel it's time. With holding sex from a commited partner is an immature "leverage tactic" FOR A ESTABLISHED COMMITED RELATIONSHIP. For someone to they would stop seeing a girl for withholding sex from you even when she likes you... just supports my argument that girls should (some do) with hold sex until commitment because it will weed out guys that aren't serious about a real relationship. If it isn't about sex then taking it off the table shouldn't worry you a bit. There is a difference in spending money on a girl and investing in them. Any rich guy can throw money at a lady, we see right though that. Investing in a woman is different. When you make her see that she is a priority over other things (including sex) she will know you are sacrificing your time and efforts just for her. Once we know you're commited we do the same in return.

    • @assley its funny how all thisshit is in a womens direction. like "invest in a woman" make her happy" "show her you love her". all this shit seems to be all for women. societys made men seem like we dont know how to take care and treat women. suddenly splitting the bill shos that u can't financial take care of a family bs towards men.

  • He should be dumping you.

    2|7
    1|0
  • "I'm testing a guy"...*facepalm*

    This is why Game Theory is a thing: because women like you make men's lives miserable; in your attempt to "learn" what kind of man you think he is, you give him shit tests to contrive grievances, and with those grievances you hold him to account for failing to live up to the ridiculous expectations you have hoisted upon him.

    But, of course, it's his fault for doing or not doing what you expect of him. Not yours for inventing things to complain about.

    0|5
    1|1
  • honestly i dont think a guy should be expected to pay for dates in this day and age. women in their 20's make more money than men on average anyways but thats besides the point. Why do you even want him to pay anyways? i mean that makes you sound like the cheap one. you are a working woman i assume, which means you must take responsibility. its not the 1950's where women didn't work. if you can both pay just pay. why dont you want to be independant. You may like the tradition of a man paying but its really just unfair to him. and this trend of bill splitting really isn't going anywhere soon, infact its only going to become more common place.

    1|3
    0|0
  • I say that you should dump him do that he find someone a lot better than your entitled worthless ass...

    2|4
    2|0
  • You are "testing the guy" ? Wow, that's pretty cold. Sorry, it sounds like you aren't really into him, and you are all about what he will spend on you, either now or in the future. Do this guy a favor and stop seeing him. Sounds like you are all about the Benjamins. Find a guy who has lots of them and hang with him until he gets bored.

    1|2
    0|0
    • Lol, The guy doesn't even have a real job and I just lost my virginity to him. If I cared about how much money he had, i would be chasing after guys whom I know for sure make $100k+.
      The question here is about dating etiquette. I am trying to see if him agreeing to split the bill is a sign of frugality and non-seriousness.

  • Dont be greedy, guys will pay for the meal if you the girl made the meal enjoyable. If a guy really is interested the price really shouldn't matter. If a guy really loves a girl the money won't matter the real question is are you doing enough that he feels the need to treat you to a meal.

    0|0
    0|1
    • Stupid guys will continue to pay for meals. Men that are seeing decent women will have the women offering to pay sometimes too because attraction is based on human qualities, not money and she wants to show he means much to her.

    • Well there might be a reason why they haven't found the right girls cause they keep on just letting themselves get used.

  • He deserves a better woman , you are a cheap woman , I hope this is a troll lol

    2|6
    0|0
    • How am I a cheap woman when he's the one who wants to spend as little money as possible and he's the guy? lol

    • What about all of the dates that he paid?

  • How many dates did he pay for? And you?

    And you're just trying to figure out now if he's a hit or a miss?
    Do you LIKE the guy? Are you willing to pitch in at all to help him? Or is it all on him?

    The term entitled snowflake keeps bouncing around inside my head. It's it true? Or is it not?

    0|3
    1|1
    • She put $20 in his "fix my car fund" lol that's a start.

    • spot on. i've been on a night out with a group from work before and had a girl who i was friendly with, nothing more, ask me if i thought she was worth it to spend £k on something for her. there are a few of them around...

  • More from Guys
    42

What Girls Said 40

  • If you're "testing" guys intentionally rather than just letting your impressions of him form organically, you're not mature enough to be dating in the first place.

    7|9
    1|0
    • Also, take your damn turn paying. You're not a child.

    • I don't agree with the asker's idea of playing games and totally get why she wants to do it, but I do agree that if a guy is expecting some in the end, he should pay for the movie, dinner, concert, or whatever. It's only fair. Not childish.

    • @Summerglo what you just described sounds essentially like prostitution...

      Guys shouldn't feel entitles to sex on a date and if they do, maybe consider that they're not worth going out with again?

      Women shouldn't expect to be paid for on every single date.

  • if you dump him, you'll only be doing him a favour.

    times are tough for everyone; therefore, if you are working and making your own money,. you can pay for your own dinner. stop behaving like an entitled brat.

    maybe he's cheap. or maybe he just realizes how fiscally irresponsible you are, to the point that he doesn't see a future with you.

    plot twist: he's testing you to see if you love him or his wallet; if that's the case, the irony is so delicious it's fattening.

    2|7
    2|0
  • Not her fault guys. So many things are telling girls they need to find the wealthy, knight in shining armor that will sweep her off her feet. We hope you see more in him than what he can buy you to eat. He sounds like he is not stable financially, which most people are. You need to realize that first... there are only a few percentage of men that will date you and never ask for anything in return. If you're wanting to never pay for anything then you need to up the game and date more successful men. It will come at a cost though. You'll pay for it some way or another.
    THIS IS ALL ABOUT SEX
    If he paid for dinner, then told her he has to get his car fixed and took $20 from her... then he's doing what all you guys are all telling her she's wrong for doing. Taking someone's money. Was that $20 really going to help him fix his car? No. If she offered, he should have declined (who takes $20 from someone they don't know well). If he asked then, he shouldn't have gone on a date if he can't afford it. Yes as a women it's hard because we know for most guys dates (If they even do that) mean they are trying to have sex with you. We don't want to have to pay half the bill for something that is solely used to get sex from us. WE ARE GIVING YOU ENOUGH BY HAVING SEX WITH YOU and spending time trying to figure out if you are genuinely interested in more than just sex. Unless sex is totally out of the question and you are both saving yourself for marriage the guy should pay until the relationship is monogamous and committed. that way you know you won't be paying for your own pussy lol

    2|1
    0|5
    • To sum it up date rich men for free stuff. If he buys you enough stuff you can reward him with sex.

    • Show All
    • Well no harm done.

    • @CHRIS11796 so what when comes to dating that guy has to put in all the effort to prove he is useful to the girl? Tell me what type of effort does the girl really put in when it comes to dating? Because most girls aren't and won't be initiating shit. Dont give me the whole we make ourselves look nice or give you our time or have sex with you. Because if thats all you do or have to offer than your worth is very very limited. So tell me what do most girls actually do. What type of effort do you put in.

  • Golddigger.

    This is so fucking stupid.

    1|7
    1|0
  • You're complaining a guy would want to split over a measly $20, but you're the one who would dump a guy over $20 so who is the shallow and cheap one here?

    1|5
    2|0
  • If he 'accepts' to let you pay for your own food, that means not much more than that he sees you as an equal.
    I mean.. women can't expect to be treated 'equal' to men in the workplace/school, etc., then still hold men to fulfill age-old traditions like paying for our meals, right? We either demand to be treated equally, knowing that this means we'll no longer be given special treatment, or we continue to be treated like children and accept that, like children, we'll be taken not quite as seriously as grown men to boot.

    0|1
    0|0
  • I don't think that guy has the DUTY to pay on a date. After all, it's just a date, like going out with your friends, you guys have no official status whatsoever so why would he have to spend money on you?

    BUT it's a very nice act of courtesy if he does pay. And this is not only limited to dates, but even going out with friends, sometimes I would pay for them, sometimes they pay for me. It's courtesy and it's a bonus and highly regarded by myself and many others, but in no way is it a duty for them/him to pay.

    Honestly, if I went on a date, I would bring my own money. And I would want us to pay for own stuff. BUT if he insist on paying I would love it and it would be a big plus. I expect him to at least suggest paying for the date but i will insist on paying myself because I don't want to feel like I owe him sex or another date etc.

    2|1
    1|0
  • Just dump him and solve his problem of being with a gold digger instead of trying to trap him. Guys don't read minds so if you offer to pay he'd accept.

    2|7
    1|0
    • I disagree. A real man would decline and pay for the bill assuming he really likes her.

    • Show All
    • Stop trolling.

    • Sorry for hurting your feelings.

  • So you are testing him and asking us for the answer? Why test him if you don't know the answer?

    Oh wait. You do. You just want confirmation you are right.

    For the record I hope he leaves you for being a close minded, entitled bitch.

    1|5
    2|0
  • Maybe he was testing you?

    3|4
    1|0
  • That's messed up! I've paid for myself on first dates but also had my date offer to split it. Take a date as you getting to know someone, you shouldn't base a date off money, base it off the connection you have and how great of a time you both have together.

    1|4
    0|0
  • Why do I get the sense this is just a troll question, to intentionally antagonize guys on gag lol 😏

    1|3
    0|0
    • Haha I just love how angry they're getting because the truth hurts and they have nothing to substantiate their points lol.

    • @shadepudding Calling me childish names like you are right now isn't a valid point. Fuck off moron.

  • He has paid for the other dates and you want to dump him just because he wants to split the bill? Men doesn't always have to pay. Life is tough, things happen that will make us go broke at times. Maybe you should break up with him so then he can find someone that is more understanding and not going to break his heart just because he wants to split the bill.
    I'm sorry and I'm not saying this to be mean, but it's kind of unfair by what you are saying.

    1|1
    0|0
    • Oh and to answer your other question: " . If he accepts to let me pay for my own, does it mean that this guy is frugal and doesn't see a future with me? " That doesn't mean anything my best friend brother is married to a girl and they use to split the bills and when she set up the date she pays for everything and doesn't have a problem with it.
      I'm the same way, my boyfriend and I split the bills sometimes and I want to pay when the date is my idea, I'm not going to set up a date and my boyfriend doesn't have enough to pay for anything because I think that's not fair.

  • If you're going to dump a guy who made you pay for yourself once, I think you should dump him so he can find someone better.

    1|5
    1|0
  • If anyone's cheep it's you. He broke his car and you're bitching over $20?
    A healthy relationship isn't who pays it's who you get along with and love.

    1|5
    1|0
  • My boyfriend is a millionaire real estate developer. Meanwhile, I'm getting a startup off the ground and living in temporary housing.

    Guess what? I still pick up the check from time to time. It says that I appreciate and care about him, and that I'm not looking to use him. And that I'm independent and self sufficient.

    Man up and quit acting like a princess.

    0|3
    2|0
  • Omg! Like seriously? Why can't you pay?

    2|5
    0|0
  • Eh.
    I see it this way. You have people that believe in the traditional way , and those that don't.
    If he is asking you out, yes he should pay. I've offered to pay for dates, And the guy usually appreciates it, but declines. For it went against the way they were raised.

    Then you have guys that feel they shouldn't pay anymore after the 2nd date. I had a guy ask me for 30 for gas, for him asking to come and see me, then he wanted me to pay for my own date. At the end he goes "I hope you enjoyed the date". how? It felt like I was hanging out with a coworker.

    If I ask a guy out on a date, I'm paying. Why? Because I'm the one that asked. Then again, they never wanted me to pay either way. For they are gentlemen.

    Also for all the people saying "equal rights". That should be for women that actually need it. Like in courtiers where women get mutilated at any age, married of at 4 to a 50 yr old man, can't drive, can't speak and all these other things.

    0|0
    0|1
  • Save 100% on dates by switching to single

    2|4
    1|1
  • You seem entitled and unappreciative.. If you want a guy to take care of financial issues go right ahead and drop this guy. He isn't your type if you had to pay once.

    2|3
    1|0
  • While I do think before dinner there should have been a conversation before dinner assuring that going in on half was fine (since he previously was fine with paying), however I hardly think its a wild expectation for the woman to pay for herself.

    1|1
    1|0
  • You're kidding me right? When I go out with a guy, and he wants to pay, then great because who doesn't like getting something for free am I right, but you shouldn't assume that your boyfriend is a walking ATM every single time you go out. There will be times that he can't pay for everything. But honestly, I also think it's best to pay 50/50. I think in that way, it shows that you are a fair person who is willing to support him just as much as he supports you (when it comes to finance).

    1|3
    1|0
  • Where do you get these ideas?

    2|3
    0|0
  • I think that's dumb. He shouldn't have to be the one that constantly pays for stuff. Just because he asks you to pay for yourself that doesn't mean that he's cheap or doesn't care. If he doesn't have the money then he doesn't have it.

    1|2
    1|0
  • I think if he's paid for other dates you can throw some money down too. Guys shouldn't be responsible to pay for everything

    0|3
    0|0
    • I don't understand where the "if he loves you or is really interested he'll pay for you" is coming from. That doesn't make sense... Relationships are definitely a 2 way street. And it's respectful to put your own effort into it. E. g. Paying for a date once in a while. And just because a guy pays doesn't mean he expects to get between your legs. Even if he did, you as the girl more than likely already knew if you were going to let him or not before the date even happened. And if he's already paid for a few dates and you've clearly let him have your poon, there's obviously a relationship building so you can handle paying for what was probably the cheapest date y'all had. Assuming guys should pay if they expect to get some, only affirms to the fuckboys out there that all they have to do is pay for a meal and not actually be a gentleman to lady

      by the way.. you're paying a lot for a Brazilian, mines only $60 and that's including the $10 tip I leave

    • Show All
    • On his part?

    • Okay but how or where did he ask for the $20. Like was it just out of the blue? Or was it during a date or what?

  • I'm all about female empowerment... But there are some things that speak to character. While a woman should not be dating a guy for his money, a guy SHOULD be paying for the first date and probably first few dates. Guys can say "it's not FAIR, it's 2017!" And it's also not fair that women get paid less in the workplace, are held to double standards if we want to hookup early on in the dating process, and are expected to maintain ourselves visually whereas guys can just be part of the "good old boys" club and get ahead.

    I'd say don't "test" him by you offering to pay right away... let the bill come, take a bite of food, and a sip of your drink, and continue your conversation. If you get the sense after 5-10 minutes that he's not making a move to pick up the bill, you can make a move to put your money out (rummage through your purse). And if he is expecting you splitting the bill.. he can also accept the fact that he's now in the friend zone.

    I'm not a gold digger, I have a great job, etc... but I have given so many broke guys a chance, I've seen how whether they pay or not translates to how they approach their life at a higher level, and how much respect they show me in a relationship.

    AND, I don't need to date a rich guy... we can go to a cheap little Chinese/ Mexican place for the first date. If I know the guy doesn't have much going on financially, I don't make unreasonable requests... but I still expect him to pay on the first date, and until we start getting more serious.

    1|0
    0|5
    • You know I once had a woman bring up "woman's rights" on the first date and when the bill came around ($80+) I pointed to it and said "speaking of woman's rights... look there's the penis tax."

      She laughed uncomfortably because I just blatantly pointed out her hypocrisy. She then weakly, reluctantly offered to pay. I regrettably picked up the tab. We did make our later but driving home I decided I wanted nothing to do with her afterwards. She was spitting image of a feminist hypocrite.

      Yes it is 2017. Yes guys are starting to fight back. Feminists have gone WAY too far.

      As for wage gap that is a complicated myth. Women choose different careers that pay less than men. I'm sure we are going to get in a long argument about this but I'm going to quit being quiet like my fathers generation (who underestimated the relational destructiveness of feminism).

    • Show All
    • @somewheresomeway I'll tell you also... I hope you don't become jaded (I hold grudges) The girls you have described sound sooo shitty.

    • It's gone from bad to worse lately. Honestly I'm at the point where I'm considering just getting hookers to get my needs met. I'm getting screwed financially either way.

  • Hello troll. Splitting the bill is a good thing.

    1|2
    1|0
  • This is hilarious. Stay single.

    2|1
    1|0
  • The bottom line is: if it bothers you move on. You don't owe anyone an explanation

    2|1
    1|0
  • When me and my boyfriend go out... I get the movie and he gets the dinner

    2|0
    1|0
  • More from Girls
    10
Loading...