As the title states, my girlfriend got pregnant, i was using condoms but I thought hey condoms aren't 100% effective even though I had some doubts because she had guy friends but we had gotten into issue about this and me being controlling, I backed off and we got married, the baby was born and now about 2 years later it comes out that the baby may not be mine, how I learned this was from one of her girl friends, apparently everybody knew except for me and all her girl friends decided to keep it quiet from me to apparently , "help my girlfriend" now wife, but this one friend felt so guilty that she told me, now we did a DNA test and the baby is not mine and my wife went from crying and saying sorry to becoming a nasty person along with all her friends being total bit@hes to me saying I'm going to father that child and that I'm going to be paying child support, an even bigger slap to the face, I think I know who the father is because she is still friends with this guy and her friend told me that this guy likes her, what do I do, am I on the hook for child support and this guy gets away and gets to live with my wife while I'm stuck paying for their stupidity what do I do? Also if it helps, I am in the state of California, help?
Most Helpful Girl
hi, for me as a parent it is always about the child as a priority, however, so so often grown ups cannot achieve this stance. you have been a dad to this child for two years, so my initial response is this, as his dad of two years do you feel that he is part of your life and you would want to continue to be his dad? i appreciate this could be complicated if you spilt from the mother, are you still with her now? i dont know about u. s but if you can prove you are not the father you would not be liable for any child support over here, you have a maintenance for ex wives though dont you? do you have a free legal advice service in your area? i suppose ultimately you need to decide what you want to do as in stay, leave, keep seeing the child etc then go from there. Although this is a harsh thing to say and im a single mum so i mean no offence but a child of two would most likely never recall you in their memories, thats not to say you won't have to go through that, unless you could forgive her and stay and make a go of it? is that a possibility? xx0
Most Helpful Guy
If it isn't yours, divorce her.
You need a good lawyer. Liberal states like CA try to make you still pay even though it is proven to not be yours. Even if ordered to pay, don't pay. If they try to put you in jail for it, once you win the paternity case, you can sue the county and your ex both if that happens.
What you need to do now is put your vehicles in a trusted relative's name, take any cash out of your savings and have it in that relative's name in a safety deposit box, cancel all credit cards, and THEN file for divorce.3
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