What makes someone to not be relationship material and why can't I get a relationship when I have no problem attracting people?

I'm a bit shy but I'm also very sociable, easygoing, funny and genuinely interested in people. I guess I don't look too bad. I have no problem getting attention (which I don’t really enjoy that much), being asked out or having guys fall for me. But the problem is I seem to be unable to get a relationship. Everyone just backs away when they realize I acually might be interested in them. I just end up having these silent admirers, guys making songs about me, stalkers and "friends" but no one to really be with me. And no I'm not just being used cause these guys never have the guts to even try to get too intimate, they just freak out and get tongue tied and leave me alone so they wouldn't bother me. It just breaks my heart that I can not make anyone to stay and try if it could work out. I'm not actively searching for a relationship, but I wouldn't mind one and I just want to find a way for the guys not to always back away. It's just.. this can't be about the guys if it keeps happening to me constantly, right? So is there possibly something undateable about me, something that makes me not be relationship material? What makes someone to not be relationship material and what to do about it?


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What Guys Said 1

  • Maybe they think you want them to be something they aren't? Or they want a simpler girl. Hell, I'd date you (well, if I didn't have a girlfriend already) from what you've said.

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    • I've never wanted to change the guys. I want the real person and if I fall for a guy I don’t understand why they should try to be something they are not when I already like them the way they are. But yeah they still always try to impress and please me etc. I don’t know...
      I know that at least 3 of the guys that were crazy about me but backed away started soon after "us" new relationships with these other girls that were maybe a little simpler but still kept keeping tabs on me. Not a nice situation to anyone :/ I've had hard time trying to understand them.
      Aww, well that's a nicely said :)

What Girls Said 1

  • Girl, I totally understand. I'm sure you are a wonderful human being! Don't let things like this get you down, you will find the right person eventually. We can't all be relationship material to everybody. I have trouble finding people interested in me too!

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