A guy I met on a dating app and I agreed to be casually exclusive. Why does he never ask me to hang out and give excuses as to why he can't hang out?

I met this guy on a dating app, and we've been on three dates.

First date we went to a wine bar and hit it off. He said that it was the best first date he's gone on. I had a bit too much to drink and we ended up going back to his place. He tried having sex with me, but I denied him. The next morning, he offered to either take me out to breakfast or if I was too hungover he could run to the store to make me breakfast. He skipped hanging out with his friends that morning to hang out with me.

Second date was really bad. Everything was fine until we went back to his place. I was texting the entire time and also found out that my ex had started seeing another girl that day, so I was in a cranky mood. I insulted him a lot as a joke but he took it personally. I kept talking about my ex to him and he said it seemed like I was not ever him.

After convincing him to go on another date with me (he said he didn't want to see me again after the second date went badly), we hung out and everything was fine. I noticed he talked less and was a bit distant, and we ended up having sex that night.

The next morning, he brought up how his intentions were to be casual and that he wasn't really looking for a long term relationship right now, but he said he was open to it developing into something serious later if things went well. His reasoning was that he wanted to take it slow since he's felt pressured to be in relationships in the past when he didn't want it. We also agreed to be exclusive. Things were amazing, and he even walked me back to my apartment.

My problem is, it's been two weeks and I've asked him to hang out 3 times - everytime he's said he's busy or tired. I called him out and he said he doesn't know how often he wants to see me and he's just really busy with work. He said not to worry and that he just needs me time, and he also has a "birthday day" every weekend so can't chill.

If we are essentially casually exclusive sex buddies, why would he not want to hang out?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Two weeks isn't really that much time.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Maybe he found someone else or is interested romantically in someone else and just isn't up for it? It seems like he backed off a lot after the second date since you were talking about your ex and insulted him, and the date was bad all together. He seemed to have gotten over that second date though if you two agreed to be exclusive with sex after that, but maybe he thought things over and just isn't feeling it anymore , why not ask him?

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • I thing he isn't interested in either of the things with you. So its best to move on

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  • he got what he wanted.. that's why.

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What Girls Said 1

  • He would make time if he wanted to but I reckon he is probably going on dates during these "birthday weekends" but keeping you on the back burner in case none of them work out.

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