Guys, if you were in a relationship and your girlfriend hangs around her ex?

what would you think of your girlfriend?

Say she is really into you and you are confident you wouldn't lose her or you come across that to your girlfriend. What would you honestly think if you were gone for a week or two and you found out your current girlfriend was hanging around with her ex boyfriend?

I am just curious of what other guys think.

She does not have any children with the ex, and that they live apart and very different lives.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Case in point: this actually came up a week ago with the girl I'm dating. Using that as an example, yes, she and I have already decided that we want to continue seeing one another and no one else. Yes, I'm confident that she's interested in me enough that she isn't going to return to her single life-- she has already said as much since we discussed the nature of our relationship at this stage. I also trust her since she's been absolutely honest with me from the time we first met. And vice versa, I've been totally honest with her. We also know that we're both pretty considerate of other people's feelings and that cheating would be like the cardinal sin of deal breakers. Given that we have that foundation, I know I'd trust her if she happened to spend time with a male friend or her ex.

    So what happened last week? She told me she was hanging out with her ex-boyfriend, talking about life. They broke up a few years ago and when she first told me about him, she was very clear that she would never go back to him, she learned a lot from the relationship, she grew up, and she knows what wants now (which is not him). Nonetheless, they've known one another for many years, so they're on friendly terms. I didn't feel any jealousy when she mentioned him because he's not competition, but I was curious what they talked about. Turns out she was telling him about me and how everything has been going really well between us.

    Back to your question, if I was gone for a while and she was hanging out with him, I would want to know what they did/talked about, but I probably wouldn't feel negatively about it. I might tease her about it, but ultimately act confidently to convey my sense of trust in her. Trust builds more trust.

    • But they have been broken up for about three months, they do talk regularly, yes they are on friendly terms. So I kinda do see where you are getting at.

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What Guys Said 2

  • Hanging around an ex is a dealbreaker for me. An ex is an ex for a reason. Women especially have a harder time breaking emotional bonds. Assuming she felt strongly for the man in the first place, how is she "not" going to have feelings for him in the present? To me, this is double dipping. The girl should stop dating her current guy and go back to the ex, or stop including the ex in her life (assuming also that she doesn't have any children by the ex).

    • She does not have any children with him, they go to different school's and they can easily lose contact if they just didn't text each other or anything.

  • id leave her