What are your dating pet peeves?

A sequel to my previous question.

Tell me what annoyed/annoys you about dating.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • The whole concept of dating. It's so contrived. I'd prefer to just think of it as two people getting to know each other who meet up to further that goal. Once you call it 'dating' it's almost like it becomes choreographed. I prefer things to be more fluid and organic.

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    • I completely agree with this!

    • I think dating's gone horribly wrong when it feels contrived. Maybe that's what happens when you jump into it too quickly, but I just prefer seeing the whole dating thing (if online), as getting to know people and then seeing where it goes. So sometimes you just end up talking for months and realize you're just friends material, and not meant for dating.
      But I like the concept because it makes getting to know people easier.
      But of course I do get your point.

    • Give this man MHO.

Most Helpful Girl

  • Pet Peeves go both ways - so I'm not trying to be a hypocrite or only hate on men. I know some women can be the same.

    1 - Clinginess. Especially when they check your recent activity 24/7 on social media sites and use it against you.
    2 - PDA. I don't like making out and cuddling in front of strangers. I consider it rude, and I'd be grossed out seeing a couple do the same in front of me. Common Courtesy.
    3 - Showing Off in Front of Friends. Had a guy once use my hair to swipe the sweat off his forehead in front of his friends to make them laugh. :)
    4 - BAD HYGIENE. - This has to be the biggest pet peeve for me. I don't care how fucking hot you are - if you have bad breathe, don't use deodorant, don't wash your ass crack, or don't fucking bathe in general, I'm done. Just done. You'll never hear from me again.
    5 - Bad Mouth. - Cursing is fine, just how often and how you use it.
    6 - Rudeness - Dated a guy who called some random guy a faggot just for something he was wearing. It made me uneasy. If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. You keep those kind of comments to yourself.
    7 - Impassiveness to animals. If you like to hunt, hit your dog/cat as "punishment", keep your dog outside, prefer dogs over cats (kidding), etc. Don't bother.
    8 - Insolence. Talking back to your Mom, calling her names, walking over her is just so disrespectful and tells me what kind of person you are in general. Only exception is if she physically abused you or something. Insolence goes for how you treat your friends as well.
    9 - Laziness. Enough said. I need a man with motivation and goals.
    10 - Smoking, Drugs, & Excessive Drinking. I don't like a guy who smokes, or is an alcoholic. My Father is an alcoholic and I don't need another one in my life. I get nauseous around others who smoke tobacco. Weed is fine as long as it's not 24/7.

    I could go on but I don't want to waste anyone's time.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 53

  • The dating phenomenon of "ghosting" where the person you have been dating just suddenly disappears without a trace and with no explanation. You're left with the feeling of what the hell just happened. This has happened to me as well as male and female friends of mine.

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    • PREACH! This is the absolute worst

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    • @aminature Thank you , she is better now , and despite being solo , you come across as positive towards men , so another thank you , sadly you are in the minority.

    • @TaureanBull81 Not just Sydney or Australia as a whole for poor dating for men , the entire 1 st World Western group of countries , but especially Anglophone countries like ours ( UK for me ) Seems even worse in North America , both USA & Canada. Strong feminist influence & anti male propaganda / male negative " media " influence is the common theme , I know Aussie men get bashed by the " media " too !!

  • -constant gameplaying
    -not telling you that they have boyfriends or husbands
    - cockiness/ ego/ entitled ( I don't care how pretty you are. That's major turn off

    I know I'm not perfect and I know there's things I've done or said that would going under someone's petpeeve category.

    People are weird. dating can be annoying and difficult at times.

    Sometimes I think it's better to relax at home with your dog and watch a movie, but As cliche as it sounds I still believe there is that right girl for me.

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  • The lack of straight forwardness in dating. The whole "game" around it. I'd like to more or less skip that for a true relationship.

    In online dating: those girls that match with you but then do absolutely nothing to keep a conversation going, or don't even respond. If you're not interested in me, don't match with me. That defeats the whole point of matching with someone.

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  • Where do I start?

    - girls who have boyfriends but won't tell you end waste 4 hours of your time just so they can get some validation

    - ghosting/flaking

    - the "you're a great guy, but..." speech (just woman up and say you don't find me attractive, or just stick to "no thank you")

    - girls who can't hold a conversation so it feels like you're in a job interview and have no idea if you're wasting your time

    - those shy girls who act like they want to run away from you while they secretly like (and then go on GaG to complain they're still single)

    - when some douce interrupts you with some tall tale you just know is complete BS and you wished you lived in simpler times where it was socially acceptable to punch the little punk in the gut

    - when you find the guy she was with the whole time wasn't actually her boyfriend, but it's already too late

    - when she seemed perfect, but not the brightest bulb

    - when she's smart AF but also ugly/fat AF (hey, I'm just saying out loud what everyone has been thinking at some point)

    - those aggressive women (usually >10 years older and/or obese) who won't take the hint from the traumatised look on your face

    - when your friends tell you a pretty girl was looking at you... 2 hours after it happened...

    - when she gives you a really thoughtful present and you feel guilty because you can't think of anything to give back that's just as good

    - girls who are too uptight/insecure/full of themselves to take a joke and don't seem familiar with the concept of sarcasm

    - when you're cuddling and trying to decide if you'd be an asshole for mentioning your arm or leg just went numb

    I'll stop here, I have to think about my blood pressure...

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    • "those shy girls who act like they want to run away from you while they secretly like (and then go on GaG to complain they're still single)" lolz

  • Poor hygiene, *expecting to be paid for when *they* ask out*, sanctimonious attitude, and that's just to name a few.
    But my *biggest* pet peeve is when people have a desire in mind, expect you to pick it up by tuning into their mind or whatever, and then get mad when you don't. It's pathetic.

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  • Just how... passive women are. They practically ask to be treated like children. But only when it benefits them to do so, of course. When it doesn't, you have to treat them like an adult. Which is what I would just prefer to do all the time, but apparently that's asking for too much. It's the inconsistency that bothers me the most. I'm not your damn father, it's not my responsibility to pay for you or treat you like a princess. I just want to meet a woman who is an actual adult and not a kid in an adults body, but that's not realistic. How am I supposed to respect someone who won't take any initiative?

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  • promiscuity and over inflated sense of self/ego/entitledness

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  • When she feels entitled to me paying for all bills because she has the vagina 😠😡
    So many men get used and screwed over by it. I don't want to fall part into these undetermined but high statistics.
    And mind games.
    And being annoying and talking about her exes.

    No, f that. I'm 180* and dash 💨

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  • (Only online dating experiences)
    - When people do not put any effort into a conversation and just expect the other person to do everything
    - "How are you?" In the beginning of a conversation. It ticks me off way more than it should
    - People ghosting you after a seemingly nice conversation
    - when somebody compliments your looks all the time but doesn't actually talk about anything with you, like?
    aaand
    - People that use too many emojis

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  • I don't like when she can't decide and gives me the decision all the time.

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  • 1. I can't get a date

    That's it...

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  • Women who are glued to their phone.

    Women who can't carry on their part of a conversation.

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  • Girls who believe they have the right to judge me, flakes, girls who think rudeness is funny, girls who interview me rather than talk to me.

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    • lol you triggered some sad little fuckboy with your opinion @HikerDude

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    • @zxcded NO, totally different. By "interview," I mean ask me a series of prying questions to figure out my qualifications based on her standards. Getting to know someone is just talking and socializing in a lighthearted way. Interviewing is, "How long were your last three relationships, and why did each one end?"

    • "How long were your last three relationships, and why did each one end?" = " Anything you do say , may be given in evidence !! " ... Sounds like a police interview... NOT a good vibe at all , I'd be gone !!

  • Someone constantly on their cell phone during a date. Whether it would be texting or phone calls they place.

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    • That is one step down from telling you to F off !! I would be gone !!

  • The fact that I cannot manage to find someone to date with. Does that count?

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  • when a girl:
    -has excessive pride
    -acts like she owns everything (cockyness)
    -doesn't smile
    -isn't being herself (somtimes she's pretending to be overly happy and enthusiastic, it's better to be nervous and closed off cause it's wonderful seeing girls open up as the dating experience continues)

    that's pretty much all I can think of right now, but I haven't dated enough to know everything these is to know about this topic.

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  • Women that think they re better the everyone and won't give the time of day


    Funny thing in the end they usually end up lonely and miserable... karma at its best

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  • By far my biggest peeve is after chatting to a girl online you meet them and discover they've either used pics from years ago or someone else's entirely.
    Just don't get it.

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  • Don't be rude. Don't be stupid.

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  • Addicted to phone. Cockiness. Bad language. No interesting conversation.

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  • Constant cell phone use, texting, phone calls, and social media use. Seriously, this has happened once. She would not stay off of her phone, so in the middle of the meal, i went to use the restroom, left out the back door, and left her with a 60 dollar dinner bill. She asked me why later on, i told her that she wasn't interested in me as much as texting and social media so i felt like she needed to pay for dinner, because i stopped being interested in her.

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  • being rude to service staff... expecting me to languish them.

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  • People who leave used tissues everywhere..
    People who leave hair on soap
    People who don't know how to laugh
    People who are too intense
    People with poor hygiene
    People who can't hold a conversation
    People who always talk about themselves
    People who are selfish
    People who don't know what equality means
    People who are racist, sexist, homophobic, etc.
    People with little to no empathy
    People who are closed minded

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  • Everything!! Hate dating. Not enjoyable at all for a guy, not this guy anyway lol.

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  • tardiness, spending without thought, nagging.. (describing a first date I had)

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  • You never know if when the other person wants to break up with you. 😕

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  • Lack of honesty and the inability to deal with the truth when its staring you in the face.

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  • When she gets a penis

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  • Literally PET peeves: if she'd have a dog that comes licking me :-(
    I'm okay with carressing a dog, or playing in the garden with it... but licking is a step too far.

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  • 1 - everybody pays for what they eat. In my country you pay forward, so it's way easier to get rid of parasites.

    2 - Bad mouthing.

    3 - being superficial, or anything that includes some sort of lie.(ex. too much make up)

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What Girls Said 29

  • the lack of reasonably attractive guys. and i'm not talking about looks. plenty of physically attractive guys... but they're either too dumb, completely boring, don't have a sense of humor at all, plain awkward, sex-obsessed, super clingy, or super intrusive.

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    • @FreeMenUnite Wow, you've really put me in my place with that scathing comment. However shall I recover.

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    • @Davyjones541 i didn't even report him or remove his comments though.

    • maybe someone did.

  • I don't know how to describe this other than just being generally unwilling to get to know me, or let me get to know them.

    Example 1:
    Me: So.. are you originally from here?
    Him: Why do you need to know that?
    Me: Just conversation.
    Him: Yeah, but it's not something that's important. I'm here now.

    Example 2:
    Me: Do you have brothers or sisters?
    Him: That's sort of a personal question.
    Me: It is? It's just finding out more about you...
    Him: Yeah well, you're asking about family. My family is none of your business at this stage.
    Me: Well, I'm not asking for their Facebook passwords.
    Him: Ask me things about ME, not my relatives.
    Me: Okay, are you an only child?
    Him: That's not something you need to know about me.

    Example 3:
    Me: Yeah, so I enjoy watching hockey.
    (((crickets)))
    Me: Yeah, um, I've lived in lots of cities.
    (((crickets)))
    Me: Look, don't you want to ASK ME anything about me, I'm just filling you with information hoping you'll tag on to something and ask me about me.
    Him: It's up to you if you want to reveal information about you to me. I'm happy you're telling me these things. But I'm not going to pry and ask things unless you're willing to tell me, and since you're just telling me things, there's no need to ask.
    Me: Okay, so why don't you start telling me about you?
    Him: If I feel like there's something to tell you, then I'll tell you.
    (((crickets)))

    I don't know what you call this, but it's sort of a trust-issue that just screams that they've had a bad experience with someone obtaining information about them in the past and did something deceitful. Asking questions and being asked questions is part of getting to know each other. Outright refusal to participate in this actually says more to me than what ever the information they might have given me if they answered. :)

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    • Wow that's sad lol. I talked to a girl who was like that as well. I just assumed she was nuts and let her go.

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    • @Messiah89 LOL I know! I think he wanted to try dating, but he obviously wasn't completely ready.

    • like I said these signs just like you stated prove deceitful an we of lies cause telling the truth is easy lying is hard to explain.

  • I really only have two pet peeves that REALLY annoy me.

    1. Using their phone during the date. Like texting, browsing the internet, or answering a call (that's not an emergency), is so disrespectful in my opinion. If a guy does that on a first date with me, it will probably be the last date.
    2. Not being straightforward. Just tell me how you feel! I don't like playing guessing games. If a guy had a good time on a date and wants to see me again, he should say that. If he wasn't into to me and won't be calling me for another date, again, just tell me so I'm not left wondering.

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  • Ohhh gosh... a few are flooding my mind right now as this was something a friend and I talked about earlier haha. A two faced person annoys me, like when he's a gentleman with me but rude and cold towards others/my friends/family. Not being a good conversationalist, like not knowing how to flow a conversation. I've had a few conversations with guys where it literally felt more like an interview than a back and forth convo. If a guy talks about himself far too much or if I'm always the one initiating conversation... It's a turn off. I don't mind a playful tease and jab, but I don't like excessive sarcastic remarks when I'm wrong about something or the guy trying to be funny by making jokes about me. When they kiss and tell, my first boyfriend did this at times and his friends would make it known that he likes to share. I also find super clingyness and the demand to always know where I am or what's going on to be very unattractive, like.. gosh, I'm my own person too and I care for a breather to do me at times.

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  • Not talking about if he's paying, if I'm paying (I always pay if I ask a guy out unless he decides he wants to pitch in), or if we're splitting the bills/expenses way before the date happens (I'm not opposed to splitting the bill, but we should talk about it to anticipate how much we should bring on the date). Seriously, if you don't talk to me (or any other girl for that matter) about date payments it ahead of time people will think you'll be the one paying for the date. I still carry a good amount of money on me just in case he hits me with a surprise "we'll split the bill", or expects me to pay for it even though I wasn't the one who did the asking just because he wants to "test" me. I also hate the "bill test" guys put us through.

    Getting the following comments or anything similar that I seem to often run across every time a guy asks me out or if I attempt to ask him out:

    WHITE AND HISPANIC GUYS:

    "Wow, when your friend described your interests, and we spoke on the phone I thought you were a white girl because you don't talk/act black."

    "Wow, you're pretty for one of those dark skinned black girls. You'd look better with longer and straighter hair though."

    "I'm okay with dating you because you're not REALLY black in my opinion since you don't act like a n*gger, and don't dress like other typical black girls. I consider you white girl." (Yes, I've dead-ass had a guy say he's okay with me because I don't act like a n*gger. He used the entire fucking n-word and everything.)

    "Wow, you're cute and small for a black girl. I thought you'd be taller, and you dress differently. It's like you're a black version of a cute little Asian chicks/White girls." (Just because I like J-fashion and I'm an otaku doesn't mean I will be your little Asian girl/White weeb substitute.)

    BLACK AND MIXED BLACK GUYS:

    "Aye lil' ma, you're cute for a dark skinned bitch. Y'all usually ugly."

    "You're cute, but would look better if you were lighter like a red/yellow bone."

    "Sorry, but you don't act black enough for me. I only like real black girls. You sound/act like too much of a white girl for me."

    "Oh wow, you like anime/are a nerd? I'm glad you're not like the majority dark skinned black bitches. You're an okay dark skinned girl. Heck, you're almost like one of those cute Asian girls."

    "If you were shaped they way black women should be then I'd consider dating you. You don't have enough curves."

    "You should straighten your hair that natural shit is ain't attractive."

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  • it's annoying when their on their phones, xhew with their mouths open, talk about their exs , compare me to or her girls, talk about nothing but the selfs and don't ask stuff about because if they don't ask they can't get to know me!
    and personally I don't think a guy needs to pay the bill I got money lol

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  • When all they do is talk about themselves and don't try to get to know you 🙄 such a waste of time!

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  • When they waste my time. I've had a couple guys try to paint this picture of what they thought women wanted and it makes me super skeptical of everything else that comes out of their mouths. I get that they're trying to impress me or whatever but a lot of times guys aren't even realistic with the exaggerations. And I myself make no pretense of my imperfections. I don't want a guy that's super insecure and sifting through lies is a waste of time.

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  • People who make it known they disapprove of a relationship, but don't know what they're talking about.

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  • What annoyed me before getting into my commited relationship was the fact that every disagreement I thought would be the end of the world, and that I felt a sense a guilt everytime i'd do something. I felt the need to impress him and try harder than I normally would. The fact is, now that i'm sort of done with datin gand I have settled into a longterm relationship I can be more myself. The plus about dating is that you don't feel commited and are able to do more with your friends and feel less dedicated to someone. The disadvantages of dating is that there are so many uncertainies and you don't know for sure the others intentions untill you finally have the whole discussion on where you want the relationship too be and how committed and ready at the moment. Dating is fun, but also is a little bit of a pain. I love being in a commited relationship as I am, however even in a comitted relationship there is ups and downs. It's never certain until you get married and finally tie the knot. Even in a relationship vs dating, there's still uncertainies that even I go through with him. You're just never sure about ones intentions until you tie the knot with them. You just don't know until then. Dating teaches patience, persistence, and readiness, however it teaches you your limits as well as timing. Yet, it also shows that you can't expect too much, and you most certainly can't predict what to expect. Dating is fun, can also hurt depending on the situation, but can also teach you valuable life lessons and that's why I feel it is such a common occurrence that more dating occurs than actual commitment.

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  • I don't like cheap guys.. also I don't like guys who keep on bragging about something all the time... or someone who's jokes are lame

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  • people on there phones constantly during a movie or dinner anywhere else i dont care. but that kinda goes for anyone friends too

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  • when they put in no effort at all.

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  • WHEN PEOPLE CHEW WITH THEIR MOUTHS OPEN

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  • Lying about stuff I don't care about and trying too hard, then insulting me for no reason. One guy took out his phone and started snapping pictures of me, yeah weird shit.

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  • bringing up exes

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  • That guys don't want commitment or take entirely too long to make a decision. That's a serious flaw in my eyes.

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  • When someone doesn't put in the same effort you're putting in.

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  • When they keep cutting me off, showing up late, not hygienic

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  • I'm kinda annoyed with guys who ask if he can kiss, touch, hug etc days before the date. It's kinda weird, in my opinion. It's not like you plan for those stuff, those just happen

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  • me being the only one to talk on dates, I just can't. ..😤😤

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  • Egotistical men

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  • Nudes nonstop.

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  • Dating itself.

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  • When someone can't keep up a conversation with me! I want something serious.

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  • how people make it complicated

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  • When he don't have his own car. So he borrows his brothers. lol literally happened to me one time. Not now. Gotta a boyfriend

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  • Having to dress up for it. Id rather just chill in my pyjamas.

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  • Getting to know a person who build high walls and not being able to get to know the person for who he really is... I know it's hard to trust some people and letting them in but come on if you truly like the person why not just do an effort

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