Ladies, in terms of dating sites, what kind of guys do you accept/reply to? is it mainly looks?

See I'm on multiple dating sites some are message based and others, you have to become friends before you message them and girls never reply to my messages or don't accept me. Now my question is, is it what I say in my messages that makes the difference or do I have to somehow change my looks? I'm not ripped am pretty skinny and my looks are probably just a small cut above average.

So put simply, is it all about looks or what you say?

btw I don't just put "hey, or hi" etc. I actually switch it up when I write messages and put something that hopefully makes me stand out.


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What Girls Said 1

  • Dating sites can actually be harder when it comes to someone's physical appearance. It's usually about looks first since you can so easily find someone else on the site. That's great that you're not just putting 'hi' in your messages as that would be worse. Looking at your picture on here though I think you are very good looking, and you have the base to be even better looking. The only problem I could see is that you are 22 and you look younger than that. So if you're skinny as you say, going to the gym and bulking up a little will fix that problem for you fast and I can guarantee you'll get more attention online and offline. Also, I prefer hair not so spiked up but that's not really a problem that's just a preference.

    As a side note, I read a study once that okcupid did with online dating and race/ethnicity. First off, they said men of any race got rejected more than women did if they sent the message. So don't feel too bad. But secondly, I was amazed to see how many people preferred to stay in their own race when it came to accepting messages and friend requests. Particularly white women. Being a white woman myself, I'm completely open to dating outside my race, but white women had the highest percentage for only wanting to date white men.

    Now I'm sure you're bound to run into open minded white women like me, but if those are the only women you're messaging that could be part of the problem. Good luck!


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