So guys how do you really feel?

So if you were talking to a girl and she was very independent meaning she has her own house, her own car, her own money, not in debt and really just got her head on right, would it bother you. Seems that guys that I have dated seem to be bothered by it. I have took care of my son and I by myself for 10 years and I do have issues with help I am just so used to doing things for myself that I just do it and don't ask for any help.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Bothered?

    I was a single parent of four for what seemed like forever *grins* I know how tough it can be to make ends meet and raise kids at the same time. You get so used to doing it all that letting any part of it go seems like life or death.

    I have a lot of respect for anyone who can come out the other side as far ahead as you.

    The problem you are facing is the guys you are going out with haven't been there. They see you as someone who doesn't need them, and for a lot of things they are right. They don't see that this isn't who you choose to be so much as had to be.

    You aren't looking for Mr Right to rescue you. You are looking for a guy to stand with you. That is rather intimidating to many guys as they just aren't sure what to do.

    They have to move outside the comfort zone so to speak. After all isn't it the princes job to save the damsel in distress? LOL

    There are guys out there who will accept your accomplishments for what they are, and you for the woman they have been looking for. Just keep kissing will finally stop hopping and kiss you back.


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What Guys Said 3

  • I think its good that you aren't needy, or crazy. A lot of guys like girls in trouble so that they can help them back to recovery.

    I think the only thing that would really bother a guy is if you have trouble allowing him to pay for things. Guys want to feel needed, and if you are paying for everything for yourself and all that, than they feel like they are just hanging out rather than dating you. If you do have trouble with that, just relax, he wants to pay for it because he likes you.

  • There is nothing wrong with a woman who can take care of herself. It's a sign that she's not a gold digger. I wouldn't know why the guys you dated were bother by this unless they like to take care of their spouse, or they feel intimidated.

  • First let me ask, did you get all those things through a divorce?

    Iv dated women who were way above my income level and it didn't bother me at all, it was really cool

    • No divorce I left him when my son was 6 months old he got on meth so I left for the well being of my son and I. As far as getting any money from him or my parents no he owes me 15,000 back child support and my parents help me with baby sitting but I am very stubborn I don't ask them for much, I was 18 when I got pregnant and my parents flipped out and while they were angry about it stated that they would end up raising my son because I was so young and well I busted my butt so they would not.

    • Show All
    • I work 2 jobs 65-70 hours a week and about to start back to school to finish my degree you do what you have to do to make ends meet I guess I could live off the government that would be easy huh? too bad I would rather just bust my butt and do the dang thing

    • Since your so busy a guy might not like it because he probably wants a home cooked meal and to see you when he gets home. It's not much fun from a guys point of view if he wants to fool around but you are too swarmed with work. The actual fact that you have money isn't a bother but what you do to get it is probably effecting the relationship

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