Are breakups equally hard for both men and women?

It seems like (maybe) women are more open about it being hurtful

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Yes, but guys take longer to realize whats haplening. So girl may feel it immedietly while guys are fine for about a mknth kr sk then it lasts for ever seemingly. I haven't gktten kver my ex since freshman year and im a senior now, but i was happy being single for a month or two

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    • That's really good to know because for me it's been about 3 weeks and it's so hard feeling like I'm miserable and he's happy

    • Just give him a few more weeks and he won't show it but he'll be the same way you are right now 😊

Most Helpful Girl

  • It may be harder for men... I think women know its coming and are better prepared. Guys can be so dense at times when it happens it is a bigger shock to them. Plus most guys lack the open support that many women have, Real friends they can be open with.

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What Guys Said 21

  • I don't know if anyone reads to back up there opinions. But as far as I've learned. Statistically men "fall in love" faster than women and take longer to get over relationship. Science men tend to compartmentalize there lives, they often try to take there mind off the situation and women prefer to talk it through as it affects all parts of there lives more. Hope this makes sense and helps you somehow.

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  • It depends on the individuals and the relationship and not about the sexes. I've had some fucked up breakups. My most recent one really fucked with my head for over half a year. To be fair she basically ghosted me and blocked me as soon as things got serious... turns out I was the other guy and she got engaged a few months after she dropped me (I had no idea she was cheating). She didn't even have the curtesy to tell me the truth or give me closure, fucking coward. She actually broke things off and told me she wanted to try again in a few months when she had her shit together. No one put a gun to her head to say that, she didn't have to string me along, but she did because it was the easiest way out for her and she had no regard about my feelings. She said and did everything possible to paint hersef in the best light possible, it wasn't until months later that I saw her for her true colors.

    See, it's almost been a year and it still bothers me to this day even though I've been happily with someone else for months now. What a selfish, inconsiderate, lying, cheating bitch.

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  • I liked one of the other comments here that hit it on the head, i think both are hit fairly hard but women generally can be open to loads of people about it, family, friends etc.
    Where harder for guys... my dad wouldn't know where to look if I brought it up really and just the way we have been.
    I think some men do turn to sex as well with others but women can do that too which normally doesn't help anyone

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    • I think this was really well put. You have a point on gender inequality when it comes to how society typically criticizes males about their emotions.

  • Of course every relationship is different. In my experience, whoever came to terms with the breakup first and noticed that things weren't going to work out will get over it quicker.

    Now as to whether there is a gender difference, I believe that men are socialized to keep their emotions inside and to play tough which might explain why they might seem less effected on the outside.

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  • i always see breakups and their legacy as a form of 'grief'. an emotion defined by its unique nature which differs from person to person.

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    • Love how you put this

    • Thank you for your kind words. It is so hard break ups. In a sense, it is why any offering of advice is ill-advised. For the feelings in the wake of a break up are so unique to every individual.

      My own experience is i am still buckled at the knees 6 years on from my marriage split

  • I'd say yeah but it depends on the person, the circumstances of how the break up happen and what was said. The one who's dumping their current partner for someone else (who they may have possibly been cheating with) will have it easier then the one being dumped in that case. Mutual break ups can be painful or non-painful for both. Someone leaving an abusiv epartner is more likely to have it harder than the abusive partner they're leaving.

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  • Yes indeed it is hard on both equally (for the right relationship) men hide there feelings a lot to protect themselves from excessive attacks from the outsiders of that painful bond.

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  • I don't think it's gender specific, it will be more harder for one who is light hearted cuz he/she will be more than in that relationship

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  • Obviously I'd be annoyed and fucked off if I'm cheated on but I'd just rationalise the situation and form a logical way of dealing with it. I. e just moving on

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  • I know it destroys guys, no other way to think of it.
    I could never really break up with a girl knowing how bad it feels - maybe for women it is different, but god did that hurt when I was younger (until it happened so many times - women being very willy-nilly about today I like you and tomorrow I don't - that I was desensitized to pain).
    But yeah, most boys don't know how to find a support system that gets them out of the breakup struggle/don't have that level of self-protective reflex (are mean to be warriors not princesses after all). I think they suffer quite a bit more because of it.

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  • I think they are much harder for men, coz we understand what happened one month later

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  • Depends on a person. More sensitive more sad the person would be. doesn't depend on gender, but how sentimental a person is.

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  • not both for men and women I mean man very said in breakups very pain in heart for breakups its
    not equally and women are so said feeling

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  • I mean for me it just depends how or why it ends, personally it's not easy when you lose some one who is a major part of my life.

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  • Yes they are hard for both because it will leave both hard broken

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  • yes, it depends on the person too

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  • Yes it is equal hard

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  • It depends on the person

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  • Depends

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  • Yes.

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What Girls Said 2

  • men turn to substances and violence and sex more often after break ups.

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    • Some do some don't some men go on with their lives like nothing happened

    • @NoOne_Special

      i did not say all. i said more often than women. and for some people 'going on' means drugs sex or bar fights. and between women and men, its more often men. thats from peoples self report so who can say factually. my guess is people take about the same time but men engage in reckless behavior women process things consciously-more often.

  • It is hard for both

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