Do I confess even if it ruins our friendship?

I've liked my close friend for an embarrassingly long time -- close to 3 years. I have dated & hooked up with others to "move on" but it hasn't gotten me anywhere. He's not one for relationships especially bc his work is his priority. I get that so I guess I only want to confess just to get the rejection over with & squash any hopes. But our mutual friend told me that he said if any of his friends were to confess to him then he'd cut them off? I always thought we had a special relationship bc he does a lot of things for me that he wouldn't normally do for others & quite frankly spoils me... so it scares me to think that he'd really throw our friendship away just bc I like him even if I am trying to get over it. It'd be really devasting for me & I cry a lot thinking about it.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • God damn I hate the situation you’re in, because that was me!!! Not to scare you because every situation is different, but I told my super super close best friend my feelings I developed (her fault) and she cut me off without even saying a word.

    Just straight silence and ignoring for a solid year. Returned and said life was better without me and disappeared again.

    Talk about CRUSHED!!! i was devastated to the max!!!

    But point is, a TRUE friend would never do this. He should be able to consider your feelings and friendship and be able to accept you have a crush, tried to see if you could advance your friendship into more and continue on from there.

    It doesn’t always have to be freindship, one Catches feelings, I have to end it because they like me. Why? Does that end things if a person truly cares yeah lol!!!

    Good luck, be brave, be strong and it takes a strong person to risk something precious for nothing :)

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What Guys Said 3

  • Just do it. The only people who can make it awkward or "ruin" a friendship is you and them. If you don't make a big deal out of it, they won't. I did it with my friend, they said they didn't feel the same way. After a little while, we went straight back to being our same old selves

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  • Yes. Honesty is a big deal. She'll either respect it and you'll move on to better days if she wants to or it will crush it down. But stop hesitating. Show some confidence and you might get something good. If you get nothing then to be honest you will lose nothing. A true friend won't leave for that though they might add some levity or brevity to your time together. Just go for it. No time like the present and tomorrow never comes.

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  • has he bought you dinners, gifts, or spent money on you?

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