Met this guy online. Talked for about a month before I went to see him at his place. We had a great evening, talked for hours, looked each other in the eyes and flirted a little. Nothing happened beyond that. Went home that night and had a message saying I was a wonderful person and that he had a blast.
One week later he texts me a little drunk. I come over to his place knowing or at least suspecting what was going to happen. We made out, got physical without going all the way because I stopped him and said I wasn't ready to have sex with him right now. That evening ended with him saying he didn't want anything serious. I said I understood and went home. Now I took this as him telling me he only wanted a fuckfriend so I kind of stopped writing to him because I am not interested in that.
The next day he wrote to me telling me he was sorry for the awkwardness between us since that night. I told him it was ok that we weren't on the same page. He wants someone to fuck and I am not comfortable with that. Then he got super irritated and told me that was not at all what he meant. That he would never be able to have a relationship like that with someone as well. That he just didn't want anything serious or any kind of engagement. I still don't know what that means?
Anyways a few days ago we went out together again. Had a good time like always. Still the same longing looks and smiles but no touching of any kind that night. But now I really don't know where I stand. Am I just his friend? What does it mean exactly that he keeps me in his life now? I mean... he was drunk when we made out so does that mean I was just a girl that was available that night to makeout with and he doesn't have any physical attraction to me? It is hard because when I see him I'd like to kiss him again. But now I really don't know how to act around him.