Dramaqueen looking for help understanding a secretive guy?

Me and this dude have been talking for 4 months and we see eachother every other weekend. he's always the one asking me to come over. We always have an awesome time and he's so sweet to me. But now last 2 months maybe we barely talk over text anymore, i dont know why. I dont think he's a texter tho cause he barely uses social media etc. Plus he's a nerdy nerd if that helps.

The other night i was drunk af, and texted him "when are we going to be a couple".. he never replied, probably cause it was a drunk text lol. and because he's shy maybe, or insecure.
We never talk about "us", or our feelings for eachother. I've said that i missed him one night and he said he miss me too. But thats it i mean, i dont know if he likes me or not cause he can't say it.

He said in the beginning when we were talking that he's looking for a serious relationship, and i said i didn't know what i was looking for. I haven't really said that I've changed my mind but I've shown him.

Today i texted him and said that im cringing so much about the text i wrote to him, and that i think its hard that we haven't talked about "us" or whatever. And i said that i dont talk to a guy for this "long" unless i want something more with him.
His reply was "haha dont worry about it"... that made me so mad, completely avoided everything i said. So i asked him why he's being so indirect, didn't get a reply. Then after that i asked if he's seeing or talking to other girls and he said "no".

I dont know what im dealing with here. It doesn't make sense?
Either he's so deeply in love with me that he's scared of talking to me, or he's not interested but dont wanna hurt my feelings. Or he's keeping me as a backup plan? But that wouldn't make sense either cause he would have found someone else by now.. So confused. He said himself that he's not a person that takes first steps tho so thats why i think he scared but im not sure.
Can someone tell me whats going on? Cause im lost. by the way im not English so grammar is not on point


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • Meet him in person and lay your heart out on a platter if you trust him, because that's the only way you'll ever find out.

  • If you say what you say for sure he is not a guy who is very upfront. In that case you should take a step forward if you like him so much. Take a leap of faith... to much of thinking has done no good for anyone

    • Yea that makes sense, thanks!

    • Sometimes both the parties are waiting for the other to take first step

What Girls Said 1

  • give him some time to think about his feelings. but you guys are not dating so why does it bother you if he dates someone else if he does, grow up and move on

    • Uhm hi. Thats not what bothers me at all, and i dont think he is seeing someone else. I asked him if he was seeing someone else cause i wanted to know where we stand. cause we haven't talked about it yet and feels like we never really get to a chance to talk about it, but obviously i want to know if he likes me back lol

    • Show All
    • well no we dont really talk about that. I think we both are people that rather show feelings than speak about it. So im probably overreacting here, there's probably lots of signs hehe. But it gets confusing when i try to talk about it and he won't meet me halfway

    • well talking helps to cause im bad at showing my feelings and talk about them so i write them down

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