Why does being a virgin makes me feel anxious and weird?

Hi there, I'm almost 21 and I started seeing someone a month and a half ago. I told him a couple of weeks ago that I was a virgin because I thought he had to know it. He said there was nothing wrong and that he would give me the time I needed. The problem is that every time we kiss I get extremely anxious because all I can think about is when that will happen. I've been insecure about my body all my life, I've lost and gained weight, I don't find myself attractive body wise. All i can think is "oh god, what if he sees my rolls, what if he sees all the cellulite I have on my legs", "what if he doesn't like me naked". All of this is driving me nuts, when he hugs me I freak out whenever he holds me tightly because he can feel my body and it causes me to get paranoid. I've had severe food addition, anyone who struggled with that knows how deeply it can affect your mind and your relationships with others. It's also my first time being serious with someone. I know it's stupid but I've sometimes considered the option of dumping him just to avoid the sex thing. We're neighbors, living away from our hometowns because we both attend college and we will go home for the holidays in about 2 weeks and I kinda feel relieved to leave. It's something I can't get over. What are your opinions/advices? Thank you.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Nothing wrong about it :)
    If you are afraid he would not accept you for your weight, think that he would not start seeing you in the first place if that would be a problem.
    It's normal that you're anxious about your first time, that part of everybody's life :)
    And if you want to do it with him, I would only suggest to start accepting yourself as he is probably accepting you right now. As you said he don't want to push you and give you the time you need, and is just your feeling about him that should matter :)

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Most Helpful Girl

  • If he truly loves u, he loves all of u, The original u. Don't feel embarrassed at all, guys dig girls who have confidence 👍 u can do it girl.

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What Guys Said 4

  • You feel relieved to leave? That doesn't sound right... try talking to him about it! If he really cares then it won't hurt your relationship at all.

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    • I feel relieved because I know it won't happen since we leave far from each other

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    • Well firstly you need to take it at your pace. This is a joint thing remember. If he doesn't like it then it'll be sad but he obviously wasn't the one for you. Secondly about the feeling vulnerable, don't let yourself be pressured in to anything you don't want to do. On the other hand I'm sure he won't care how you look when you're naked. No-ones perfect after all :)

    • Thanks! 😊

  • In sure he's well aware of those things about you. He wouldn't be dating you if it bothered him

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  • Honestly my experince with virgin was very bad like soo bad I HAD TO FAKE AN ORGASM

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    • Oh thanks! You're being very helpful dude.

    • Dont worry about the weight thingy lol... i was talking about the sex.. as long as ur good in bed he won't bothr about the other stuff... and if u wanna cut weight just HIT THE GYM WITH UR FRIEND DONT GO ALONE

  • Just be yourself

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What Girls Said 0

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