How do I stop this guy from hitting on me?

So here's the thing. I'm in a relationship and I truly love the person I am with, but there's this guy I went out with (as friends). Then he told me he is attracted to me and wants to take things further. I told him that's impossible, because my SO is very important to me and asked him if it's okay for him to be just friends. He agreed to that, but now he is offering me to go out with him behind my boyfriend's back. I want to keep him as a friend, because he's a really nice company, but only as a friend. Told him that multiple times but he doesn't let go. So what do I do?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Well if you've already told him that, and he still wants to... look. He likes you. And it's hard for someone, especially guys, to accept that the option is just done, especially when you're friends. He may not have any other options than you, and you do have other options, so you don't know how he's feeling right now. I would phrase another conversation with him like "Look, I like you a lot and you're a great friend, but that's how I like you, as a friend only. I know that sucks but I have a boyfriend, and I wouldn't want more than friendship even if I didn't. I really like you but it makes me uncomfortable to get propositioned by you, sort of. I can't hang out with you anymore if that's going to keep happening. That's not because I don't like you, but it just has to be that way."

    And that is the absolute best you can do. What he decides to do or feel after that point is not up to you; he may not be able to handle it, and you may lose him completely. Yeah... that sucks. But it's also not his fault. He has feelings and he can't have you; being around you may be too hard. If he decides to cut you off, that may be what has to happen. And you may feel bad but maybe it's for the best. Good luck.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I don’t think that you’re going to continue to be friends with this man. He doesn’t respect you, your feelings or your boundaries. You have to tell him that you love your boyfriend and are not interested in cheating on him. You tell this “friend” that you can either be his friend or nothing. And then mean it when you say it.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 11

  • Don't be his friend. If you must cross paths with him, keep it strictly business and professional, not friendly. You set up boundaries and he's not respecting them so you can't be his friend.

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  • tell him this "grow the fuck up i have a man and i won't cheat, if you want a bitch oay yourself ine, because im not doing it. And if you dont want to stop with this garbage, fuck off!!!"
    he will be a mad little 'nice guy' and eventually fuck off, but will send you rude things, just block him

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  • Doesn't sound much like a friend. Plus if he asks you to go out behind your SO's back he lacks serious qualities as a friend or more.

    If it becomes toxic with him around and he doesn't know when to stop cut him out of your life.

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  • Tell him if he doesn't stop you can't be friends anymore if he doesn't stop. And if he doesn't stop cut off communication with him. Anyone who pushes you like that is not a friend and quite frankly a waste of your time and emotion

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  • You can't keep him as friends i think he will continue because he probably thinks keeping as a friend means he still has a chance

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  • This is a stupid question, tell him you're not interested

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  • just keep on telling them that you´re happily taken... or stop spending time with them.

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  • Tell him if he won't back off u will then need to tell ur boyfriend

    Always be truthfull

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  • Look angry

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  • It's not a friend, get rid of him.

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    • It's way more complicated than that, but okay man.

    • @Anon-ymous1 On the contrary, it's very simple, as most answers most of the time. He's trying to break your couple, to make you cheat on your boyfriend. It's not a friend, it's an asshole.

  • Don't talk with him... simple

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What Girls Said 1

  • You don’t get both. If you want your boyfriend, dump the friend. Have some respect to do what’s right for your relationship, how would you feel if a girl was completely ignoring your relationship and kept begging your boyfriend to be with her behind your back?

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