Should I be upset about the fact that my mom constantly criticizes the women I date?

I love my mom, but she never likes any woman that I date. She thinks that I only date "dirty whores." I would like her to be happy for me, but I refuse to bend to her standards when it comes to dating. It's my life! No, they are NOT "dirty whores"! I date fine, wonderful women! Any suggestions on how to try to keep peace with my mom?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • What type of woman does your mum want you to date as opposed to these so-called "dirty whores" of your choice?

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    THIS IS NOT RELEVANT ANYMORE
    • So called "decent women," but she can't be specific. I don't think she will like anyone...

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    • Could be emotional displacement.
      "Mysery loves company"

    • @asker Do you think its possible your mum is a little bit jealous of the happiness you have in relationshhips? To keep the peace, don't try. I think your mum will not change her mind unless her vision for you walks through the door.

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What Girls Said 9

  • Put an end to that. Straight away. Honestly.
    It will be the best thing for:
    - you as you are a man and need to build your life by yourself
    - for her, she needa to do her own business not to control yours
    - the woman in your life as if you don’t stop that she will be frustrated and later on you might have serious problems

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  • That's a mom thing. They get over protective and sometimes think a girl will take their baby away. Just tell your mom that eventually u will settle down with a girl and trying to stand in the way isn't gonna work. Reassure her u will always be her son and no one will replace her.

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  • Sit down with your mom and let her understand it hurts your feelings that she doesn't trust you in your choices of a relationship partner. Tell her you understand why she is being protective as you are her son and no one will be ever be good enough for you but this is your life and you have to make decisions as a grown man on how to live the rest of your life. If you ever find the woman you will consider marrying soon, tell your mom what you feel. You love her but she has to respect you too.

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  • Explain to her that you're going to date who you please and that she should keep her opinion to herself.

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  • Are you dating dirty whores? 😏 You naughty boy! Lol 😂
    But seriously, what kind of woman does your mum expect you to be with? 🤔 Given that mother Teresa is unavailable, does your mother’s type of woman even exist?

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  • Yes u should be upset it not her place to judge do not judge a book by it cover also your mom has no place in mind to tell u who u can and can't date

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  • I have that problem with my mother in law.
    You need to set her straight.

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  • I think all moms do that. She'll have to get over you dating eventually.

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  • Read the mom factor by Townsend and cloud

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What Guys Said 21

  • You shouldn't give two fucks about what your mom thinks about the women that you date. You are in the 36 to 45 years old age bracket. You no longer need your mom's approval for anything. If she truly loves you she will support your choices, even if she doesn't particularly like the women that you date. She has had her own life, she doesn't need to be sticking her nose into yours.

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  • Your mom's opinion really shouldn't be of an importance to you at your age. I am more worried if my mum does approve of someone I'm with.

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    • She probably wants you to remain single hoping you'll always rely on her and remain an emotional and sexual infant for the rest of your life. To say it's not being a good mother is an understatement; your main responsibility as a parent is to ensure your children become independent adults with something to offer the world.

    • I refuse to live that way. I am considering completely cutting her out of my life.

    • If that's the only way you can ensure you're not affected by her opinions then I agree that's the best thing. She needs to understand that what she's doing is wrong and this might be the best way to make her understand that.

  • I don't know. The two extremes, your mom is judgmental and too hard on all of these women or she is wise and is giving you good advice about staying away from your selections because you keep picking such bad women who will be unfaithful, won't love you, will use you etc. She could be somewhere between those two extremes. Maybe she's being a judgmental mom. Maybe she is being a good mom.

    No way for us to tell.

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  • I don't think that you are above 20 so here's my advice.
    Sit down and talk if it doesn't work then do whatever you want, she won't have a choise to like her.

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    • I am above 20. I am just asking for opinions. I am at the point now where I am considering severing contact with her if she doesn't like it. I have no problem doing so.

    • The advice is still standing. Talk to her. If it fails the cut the ties and move on

  • No ones ever going to be good enough for mommy's prince

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  • In my life my mom is a asshole and plus if she ever said something like that to my girlfriend I wouldn’t give a fuck and I would say fuck off my girlfriend my life not yours

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  • You won't be able to, she wants who she wants for you and you don't share the same image, that's her fault not yours.

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  • Nope u need not worry at all.. if u r about 40 as the profile says ur mother must be 60 . Its common with women that age. And if u really wanna make peace with ur mom, make the girl u date meet ur mom

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  • No woman will ever be good enough for your mom. Pick one that makes you happy and she will be happy for you.

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  • I think your mom wants you to date someone who's like her, and everyone else is a 'whore'.

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    • Nah, she probably wants him to remain single hoping hell always rely on her and remain an emotional and sexual infant for the rest of his life. Mothers like that are really guilty of child abuse of the worst kind. Your main responsibility as a parent is to ensure your children become independent adults with something to offer the world.

  • Should you be upset? No, she's just wanting the very best for you. If it bothers you, you have a right to be upset. If you love and value your mother, it's unfair for you to feel like you have to choose between the woman you love and your mom. But life isn't always fair.
    Tell her you appreciate her constructive input, but the choice is yours. If she continues to devalue your choices and the woman you love, you'll be compelled to spend less time around mom. After all, you're done growing as a boy, that time has passed. If you are to grow as a man, you need to find a woman who cares about you as much as mom, but shows more respect to your personal choices.
    That said, if you haven't found "the one" yet, maybe you should let mom set you up. If she picks a winner, everyone's happy! Good luck!

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  • Stay away from her. Absence makes the heart grow fonder. At least that's how i handled my mom.

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  • Move out of her house.

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    • I don't live with her.

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    • It isn't that you "speak to her", it is what you are talking about, like you need her approval.

      "you need to learn how to spell!"
      Maybe you should broaden your vocabulary.
      https://en.oxforddictionaries.com/definition/mamma

    • I don't need her fucking approval for anything! Yes, I "speak to her" just like I do with the other human beings that I interact with! Don't you "speak" to other people? I am at the point where I am considering cutting her completely out of my life! This is actually my last straw! I put this out there to get suggestions! PERIOD! You started off by accusing me of living in her house, then you call me a "mamma's boy" (fuck the spelling-that spelling must be a Brit thing... I'm not one)... I get the point that you are putting me down and insulting me. I live 900 miles away from her. I now only speak to her once a month. This criticism has been going on for years. It would be a simple step for me to just stop talking to her, but I am seeking alternatives... if possible...

  • Stop dating dirty whores

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  • Move out.

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    • I dont tell my family about my love life. Its non of their business.

  • About how many times has this happened?

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    • Too many...

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    • Maybe my mom is a fucking bitch.

    • Yes, that could be, but without knowing personally, I'd say abrasive if not just an entirely to scrupulous caretaker.

  • I think you should date who you want your mom's your mom she'll get over it she's loved you all your life no matter what it shouldn't matter what girl you date

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  • Reach a middle ground?

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  • Up to this date, my mother has never been wrong about the girls i have dated. One thing she tells me is, "i dont care if she is older, younger, or has kids. As long as she is able to make and keep you happy, thats all that matters to me. I dont want you emotionally suffering like i did. Just be happu even if it is on your own" and you know, she is right. As a single mother, she taught me how to treat a woman, how to cook, etc. I learned a lot and i have a lot to be thankful for. She is the one that til this day, will see me in tears, hug me and tell me everything will be okay.

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    • By younger than me she means obviously just younger. Not under age!

  • It's your private life and has sod all to do with anyone else as long as you're both happy that's all that matters in life.
    Just tell her to pipe the fuck down.

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