I like it when men pick me up for a date, but it seems like he wants me to come to him occasionally and I don't like it. How do I influence him?

I like the traditional way of dating, and i was raised that the man should always pick up the woman for the date. For the first date we met at the place because we met online. Second date i basically had to tell him that for me the most chivalrous thing in dating is being picked up by the man. Third date, he essentially tried asking me if there is any shot i come to him this time and it was in text and i was able to convince him to come to me again, but then he made a comment in text later saying if there is a next time you're coming to my town lol. I don't know how to reply or what to even tell him in person anymore, because i feel like it's not going to work for me. I believe that the man should pick up the woman every time for every date no matter where we are going, and I don't know how to tell him this when this is the modern way of dating.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Well you could say that you're old fashioned when it comes to relationships, so you would like to be picked up for every single occasion that you two interact. But then he might counter that by either breaking up, or like someone has already mentioned, asking what's it in for him?

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    THIS IS NOT RELEVANT ANYMORE
    • If he likes the girl enough i feel like the work is worth it. What's in it for him is time spent with the girl he likes

Most Helpful Girl

  • ... so you're saying that he should put in all the effort in dating? What does he get out of that?

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    THIS IS NOT RELEVANT ANYMORE
    • He gets time spent with me. That's what he gets

    • Sure, but he could spend time with someone who could actually bother putting effort into dating him instead.

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What Guys Said 4

  • I would call myself fairly traditional.

    But I think what you are calling traditional is what I call entitled. Traditional does not mean completely one-sided, and never has.

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  • If it really is that important to you than it is for the best that you tell him that. Although I can relate a lot to the guy in this scenario. If you're not honest with him about this he will probably be thinking that your using him, because why should he be the only one putting in the effort?

    Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that your way is wrong. Just try to see it from his side and be honest to yourself and him.

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  • You need to give him a reason to come and pick you up. Like a BJ as soon as he arrives. You will condition him to equate picking you up with getting a BJ.

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  • Gas is expensive so take turns?

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What Girls Said 1

  • Yeah u right it’s a little confusing

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