IS MY GIRLFRIEND GOOD ENOUGH?

I've been dating this girl for (on and off) a year now, She's a big girl, when we first met, that was a problem for me but I have since grown up and realised how stupid I was being. Like I previously mentioned, we have been dating, on and off with sizeable gaps in between. Yes we have a bit of a rocky history but that's now in the past. We have both grown up since we first met each other and I feel like this girl is amazing. She is so compassionate and caring and I honestly sometimes believe she does love me BUT most of the time I feel like she just doesn't want to put in much effort. I honestly don't believe it's her attitude. She's a very sweet girl but she is also massively insecure. I'm really trying to show her how much she means to me but I find she can be cold towards me quite a lot. Sometimes her responses sound like they should be coming from a good male friend than a loving girlfriend. When we do meet up though, she's a different person. She's just great. But she also seems to not want to put any effort into making that happen either, choosing instead to constantly babysit for her sister. I do care for this girl and sometimes I honestly believe I love her but she really does come off as cold most of the time to me. Is it her insecurities, is it that just isn't that in to me as a boyfriend but still cares for me as a friend? I have fully communicated my thoughts with her and she improved for a very short time before again, reverting back to her old self. Sometimes I do believe I could do better. I now could not care about looks. I just want someone who will put as much into a relationship as I do, you know, meet me in the middle. I feel like I am carrying this one. Side note: I am soon to be moving into my own place and she has been very much enthusiastic about this, even finding properties for me and she seems just so excited to be able to share a space with just me and her. (She'll be stopping on the weekends) Are my worries stupid?

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  • Maybe you just need to chill. Not all girls are lovey dovy through text. Maybe she just prefers to show her emotion when she's there. Becareful not to smother her. Dont love for the both of y'all. Use some of that love for yourself too. Honestly with her insecuritys she can only fix that. You can only do so much to help and that can eventualy make that see herself.

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    • Thanks man, defineatly going to consider a lot of what you say and just ride it out.

    • No problem! Im glad i can help :) keep us updated

  • You seem to like her.

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    • I very much do. She helped me through a very hard time and she has shown me that I'm worth it as a person. But in between all of this, she is very cold towards me.

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