Why do guys only care about getting the hot girl?

Just seems like that, no matter what. Then they say they "settle" for a cute or average looking girl. Why the fuck? I don't feel desirable because I am a little bigger chick. I feel guys just want the thin, tan, blonde with brown eyed girls who dress revealing. I have short legs I am 5ft, pale, brunette, and have blue eyes I dress pretty modest (but tastfully). But my sister who is soooo much better looking than me is a 10/10 and I am a 3/10. She gets hit on all the time cause she's gorgeous... she's flawless.. and I barely get looked at. Even guys my age hit on her, and that makes me feel horrible about myself. And she knows she's good looking too.

Updates:
Oops, forgot to add the question at the end, why do guys care about getting the hot chick?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • There are two antropological answers to this question.

    The first refers to patriarchy, herds and alpha males controlling both all the fertile females, and the beta and omega males. This dates back to our most primal instincts as primates.

    The second one is more darwinian. Males find attractive females that visually speaking seem more fertile, hence why we mostly prefer younger women, proportionate hips for giving birth and proper, firm breasts to feed the descendants. This last one, as societies evolves and social human interaction slowly differs from sole primal instinct, has nowadays interferences from social pressure (either from religion, advertising, and all in all media in general). Anyway the primal instinct is still prevalent in some different degrees, depending on the male, his social environment, his intellectual skills and his grade of maturity.

    When this two factors are overcome then males like me start broading our spectrum of possibilities and find attractivenes in more sutile details or even devolpe new tastes in our physical evaluation of women - as a matter of fact we start to also evaluate other psychological aspects. This again is the survival of the fittest, since being in a commited relationship will require this grade of mature to ensure a high rate of success (from both parts).

    On a much more simplistic level, when I was in my young years, I wanted to get the hot chick because: (1) she arosed an elevated sexual appetite in me that could also be confused with feelings of romantic love (without the need of any social interaction with her) and (2) if the goal was achieved, that gave me rewards in my social position of popularity in the then immature herd of teen males. (And beware, many men live in that immature status refered in point two for their entire lifes).

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Most Helpful Girl

  • They don't go for the ´hot girls´. They go for those who attract them. What attracts the other, might not attract someone else.

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What Guys Said 26

  • It is mostly based on sensationalism bsht and eventually reality sets in and you go with whom you are compatible. I have seen too many hot ones get ugly quick so the shallow attraction is fleeting. by the way the hot looking ones are usually bad in bed and the average looking are sex fiends. So I will go for the average based on experience.

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  • To me that´s a good situation. I mean you´re so different from your sister so when people do look at you, they won´t go for your sister. I don´t prefer tall blondes at all and your stats sound good to me. Maybe the bigger problem is that she´s carrying herself better because she knows she´s hot. When you learn to be more confident, results will follow as confidence is way sexier than looks

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  • its mostly a society thing that guys are "suppose" to go after the hottest girl and not really care about personality, the other half is just genetic preferance here's the thing though your sister may get hit on all the time but someday you'll find someone too and they'll love you for who you really are and to them you'll be the most beautiful person on the planet

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  • depends on the guy's taste in women
    Ariel Winter and Shailene Woodley, two very different looking women but i still find them both attractive.

    Some guys will only find one or the other attractive compared to me.

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  • Guys want a girl that they are sexually attracted to along with all those other qualities that make a relationship work.

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  • Because humans are animals and their biology pushes them in a certain direction. Also it takes a second to know if you like a girls looks and much longer to know if you like their personality. I know that answer may sound horrible and im sorry, its not intended to be. All men have a type, your sister may be the type for a lot of men, but to be honest, your look sounds better to me :P

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  • Because no matter how good a girls personality is there has to be some physical attraction because we intend to have physical contact. For physical contact to be realistic there has to be attraction, so therefore dating is not possible without it. Saying personality can make up for physical appearance is just a pipe dream.

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  • Not all guys car only about getting the hot girl. If that is what you have experienced, then you've been around the wrong guys.

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    • Not at all, but they talk about them (hot girls) it just seems like that's all they aim for. Or they always stare in awe at hot women.

    • Again, get to know some different guys. Not all are just aiming for hot women. The staring is a different thing. Guys are biologically programmed as easily visually stimulated by women. While they don't have to stare, they will look and appreciate. There is something about a hot woman that gets a guys attention. That includes me, but it was never my aim to get a hot woman. I wanted a woman who had qualities that most hot women don't have. There are other guys who want the same, you just have to look for them in the right placed.

  • Ok, first: the guys hitting on your sister are probably really superficial, so its a blessing they dont hit on you
    Second: guys are often attracted to someone who is very confident. Since you describe your sister to be so good looking she probably is very self confident as well. Since you don't perceive yourself to be beautiful (im sure you probably have more going for you than you think), you lack that kind of confidence, and guys don't immediately look at you for that. Boosting your self confidence could be a real gamechanger.
    Then again, maybe humanity is just really superficial and i like to think what i said is true, since im noot a big looker myself haha
    But let me assure you, that is not just a guy thing, girls are the same most of the time

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  • Not all men are shallow. And physical attraction is only the first thing they look at. If after getting to know someone that's physically attractive and they don't like their personality, they will abort that mission. Sadly, that's just how it is... physical attractiveness is something you can see right away so it's the first thing that we judge. And every guy has different standards based on their self esteem level personal beliefs. If you want to be more physically attractive, go to the gym and stop complaining and be positive. Having a nice body accounts for 80% of what most guys look at and could make your rating go up from 3/10 to 10/10 for a lot of them. You potentially have to wake up to that person every morning so why shouldn't they be as attractive as you want them to be? I'm being a hypocrite because I have relatively low self esteem as well, but what I'm saying is all truth lol.

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  • Yup

    Its one of those ah wells. Cause everyone wants to be sexy to attract who they want lol

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  • Uhh... Because they're hot and men are all about the visuals.

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  • I go for girls that attract me, not necessarily hot girls

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  • Why would you settle for something less than the best you can have with anything in life?

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  • Several reasons.. biologically speaking, we are geared towards the most attractive mate through evolution. It's a sign of health and fertility. Societally speaking, it's embarrassing to "date down" aka to be someone attractive and have a mate below your level. Studies have shown women will date a less attractive male for comfort and security, but not true for men. Men want the most attractive mate.

    Maybe your banging your head against the wall trying to get a man above your own level of attractiveness. A man at your own level will be attracted to you

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  • Yea, you are not wrong. Men will pick the hot one more then 90% of the time. There are lots of different "whys" they do. Social media is one. Porn is another. How they were raised. What the guy looks like and his things that he is attracted to. The list goes on and on. You can't blame men tho. Yes they dumb and stupid. But I believe women have most of the say on weather they want a relationship or not. If you feel undesirable and you know Its not how you dress. Change something else but still be you. Example: You like a guy. Tell him. Simply but hard. Some guys like a women that knows what they want and not afraid to say it. Some take it differently. At the end, you just have to be yourself and keep keeping on.

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  • Because she is hot !

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  • a hot girl is different depending on the person

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  • Why do you even care? You are you

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  • ... because

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  • Because men are shallow.

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  • How much is a 'little' bigger?

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    • And honestly, as long as you can fit into mainstream American clothing sizes (S-L) I'm good

  • Lol they’re looking for a quick fuck, not a relationship.

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  • Well that’s true for a lot of guys I think but men can be assholes often. For me personally (and most of the guys I know) I am only interested in girls I am attracted to. Now she doesn’t have to be a Victoria’s Secret model but some attraction is necessary. However if I was dating a Victoria’s Secret model and she was a crappy person, I wouldn’t put up with that.

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  • 3's, 10's, it doesn't matter. They're all liberated in the first place. So it doesn't matter who the guy goes after or settles for - It's not going to work out. Their relationships will only in utter defeat.

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  • Would u want a fat guy or a hot guy?

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What Girls Said 1

  • What's wrong with being hot. If you have it, flaunt it

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