Guy friend has a major crush on me, what to do?

Its a big crush, my cousin said its akin to the one she has on someone else which is literally struggling to get that person out of your mind.

I've got two plans in mind.

Either play dumb and see what happens.
Or ask him straight out so i can let him down easy.

Because to be honest i dont like the guy, as a friend, yes, romantic or sexual interest? No.

So i want to see what you guys reckon is the best way to go or if you have another idea i haven't even thought of.

I just dont want to hurt him, but i really dont like him the same way.
Updates:
Forgot to mention, he's a new friend, not an old one. Weve known each other just a little over a month

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Most Helpful Guy

  • If you come and tell him out right you will crush him. But least you won't waist his time too. You will lose him as a friend at least as a close friend. Well if you don't then the message didn't go in. It also might have some further social ramifications but not much and not nearly as much as if you left this to stew.

    I 3rd option would be to. Mis-direct. Little underhanded but an other friend and yourself could find and introduce him to someone who likes him. I know its a Little teen drama but it does work and it's worth a try cos it won't crush him. If they do end up together tell him your not into him asap and he'll be pretty ok with it then.

    If that plan doesn't work then rip the bandaid off. Your going to do him a favour

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    • The problem with your 3rd option is he's actually in a poly relationship (didnt mention this as thought it might drag people off topic) so finding someone for him whos okay with having lunch with his wife now and then might be difficult XD

      The thing is that he doesn't know i know, my cousin was sworn to secrecy. She only told me because i recognised the weasling when she began digging for my opinion on poly relationships, then not a half hour later on the guy.

    • Subtle! Yeah you definitely could have mentioned that. I'll give it a think I'm usually good at this kinda thing. I think what strikes me right now As odd is the you painted him to be some kind of love Sick puppy and yet he's in a poly relationship in my experience those two tend to be mutually exclusive is it possible that he intentionally told your cousin knowing she would tell you opening up this possibility. To be honest it's a bit of a clever move.

      If that is true they definitely won't be cut up about it. And even if it's not true a poly relationship changes the internal dynamic in his head it would certainly cushion the Blow.

Most Helpful Girl

  • turn him down nicely
    and just mention how u only see him as a friend

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What Guys Said 6

  • Since he's a friend, you should have some idea of how he thinks, how receptive he is to beig told things he may not want to hear and how this should be communicated to him.

    Without knowing all that, given that he is a friend, I think you should be upfront with him rather than just ignoring it. If you ignore it, it feeds his fantasy even more. You have to bust his bubble, albeit sensitively.

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    • OK, you don't know him that well. Honesty is still the best policy. If he can't handle you being honest with him about this, he's too immature to be a friend, either.

    • Okay, Ill talk to him the next time i see him. I figure Ill do it right before im leaving (live in different towns, happen to be in the same club) so we still have a good time without that in between us.

  • suck him off once and do a real real bad job, so he loose interest

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    • but its the best way. or be ugly around him. stop showering and wearing make up. barf and fart near him. be disgusting till he loose interest

    • You sound like a disgusting person... I hope youve never treated anyone the way you're suggesting i do

  • Let him Down easy

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  • turn him down nicely

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  • tell him you're seeing someone

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    • Im not a liar and he knows Im not. Like i said, we're FRIENDS. Friemds temd to talk now and then.

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    • It amazes me guys are always complaining "why can't girls just be straight with us?" And this is the advice you give.
      For fucks sake, make up your mind. Would you rather we tell you the truth or play stupid games?

    • the truth and nothing but the truth

  • If you don't LIKE him, how can you like him as a friend. That makes NO sense, whatsoever. Be prepared to lose a friend

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    • So to be friends with someone you have to want to date them? That makes NO sense, whatsoever.

What Girls Said 0

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