How many days is acceptable to go without speaking to your spouse?

Asking for a friend. Her boyfriend tends to go 2-3 days at a time without contacting her and i feel that’s not normal. How many days is acceptable to go without speaking to your spouse?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I agree that it's not normal. I would say maybe a few hours or overnight if there's been a big argument or one person has done something that hurt the other. It might take some time to lick the wounds and gather one's thoughts in order to have a productive discussion. After that, I believe that the issue should be discussed openly and honestly with the goal being to reach a mutually agreeable solution (NOT to prove who was right and who was wrong).

    And, if during those few hours, something unrelated comes up that needs to be talked about I would talk with her about that. I think 2-3 days is ridiculous and not healthy for the relationship.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • A boyfriend is not at the same level as your spouse (your marriage partner).

    Her boyfriend isn't married to her, is still single in the legal sense, and doesn't owe her anything more than he's willing to give. If she can't handle it, theyre not right for each other.

    I wouldn't be okay with it, and after trying to talk to him, if things didn't change, I'd leave.

    At least a text each day to let me know what's up. At the VERY least, let me know if you plan to ignore me for a few days for whatever reason.

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What Guys Said 16

  • There's a HUGE difference between spouse and boyfriend. If you're married and not talking every day, there's almost certainly issues you need to work out or your marriage will fail. If you've got a boyfriend or girlfriend you don't live with or even see every day, going a few days without talking could be a healthy norm. There's nothing necessarily wrong with it. However, if she has an issue, they need to work it out, or the relationship will likely fail.

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  • All depends on how independent the people are. I usually contacted my significant others daily if possible, even just to say, "I hope you have/had a good day." It's no extra effort if you're in love with them, because they're on your mind often anyway.

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  • Nope... a little strange
    I expect her to never leave me hanging unless it's a good reason

    Missing in action for 2-3 days is unacceptable lol
    But you know... people seem to have shitty relationship standards it seems.. especially girls

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  • I would have hoped for six months but she would always find me and yell at me even if she couldn't see me. For a bf/gf situation, I would expect daily. In the old days before the internet, things were a lot different though.

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  • That's definitely not normal. How can one go 2-3 days without talking to his or her significant other? Your friend should definitely confront him.

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  • For spouse? Every day. No questions asked. If a day is missed, there should be a good reason.

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  • If the person is busy it's understandable. If you miss the guy reach out to him if you're so concerned, and if you're that insecure about it talk to him about it. Communication is important. Talking is 1 thing but how often do these people see each other?

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  • Considering it's a boyfriend, not a spouse I'd say it's normal. If it's my wife on the other hand there is a problem if I don't talk to her daily.

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  • I cannot imagine a single day without commicating with my significant other.

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  • Well it's best if he talks to her daily but it can only reach a maximum of 5 days

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What Girls Said 10

  • I talk to my boyfriend every day. If we’re not together in person, we text and talk on the phone. Once s relationship gets serious, I expect to talk to the person every day, unless they are traveling and don’t have phone service or other specific cases like that.

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  • That is not normal. Spouses need to talk every day, it can even be just one simple sentence like "hi how are you today?"
    Communication is key to every relationship, its important to keep that going by conversing every day with your loved one.

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  • We talk daily, even when we weren't living together. If he was busy he would say "I have to go for *insert time* but I'll message you when I can."

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  • My boyfriend lives in a diffrent state and he is 6 hours behind but we still text in a daily basis

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  • I get worried if I don't hear from my boyfriend in a few hours

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  • Zero.

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  • I honestly think it is not a bad thing. I think texting everyday can be a chore especially if you need some alone time or you have things to do.

    I am a pretty bad texter myself and by that i mean i can read the message off my notifications, thought about the reply i would reply and just totally forgot it. In my last few relationships, my date wouldn't understand why and it often becomes one of the reasons why we argue.

    However, if your friend really minds and would love to contact her spouse everyday i think she should tell him about it since different people have different thinking.

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  • You know, there is no rule. The two of them need to reach a rhythm they both like. She needs to talk to him.

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  • A day, maybe two. Anything after that, they're up to something!

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  • a few hours

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