My Brothers Hate Him For Who He Was Before. Why Do I Care? What Do I Do?

I dated this guy for eight months last year, and he was pretty much a drunk asshole most of the time. He made some sexual comments about me to my youngest brother and that kind of thing, and the kid didn’t get a great impression since he only met him the one time.
I’m not sure why I stayed as long as I did back then. I suppose because I always knew he was a good guy underneath. We didn’t talk for nine months, then started to talk again. He had taken a lot of steps to try to get his life together, and told me he really wanted me back in his life again in whatever capacity I was willing to be in it. After a few months, we started dating again. He is nothing but nice to the older of my brothers whom I live with. He has taken steps to drink MUCH less, and makes a real effort to treat me well. My problem is that my brothers still don’t like him.
According to the older one, this guy is admittedly better than other guys I have dated and is treating me nice this time. His argument, though, is basically that he thinks I am settling for good enough when there could be someone better out there. I’m not really sure how to handle this as my brother and I are very close.
I’m not in love with my boyfriend again, at least not yet, but I do care about him a lot and have seen the lengths he has gone to in order to better himself. He is blunt and sarcastic, especially with others around, but a lot of it is just what he has learned in order to protect himself. He’s a truly good man, and I really care about him. What my brother said made me doubt myself, though, and my boyfriend.
It made me feel scared, which is why I didn’t immediately want to enter into a relationship with this guy again. I’m afraid things will go back to the way they were, even though they have shown no signs of doing so. I guess I just don’t know what to do, or even if I have to do anything. I just need advice.


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  • Just take things super slow. If he slips up or anything like that then you know he's not worth it.


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