How much is too much time to take away from a relationship?

My boyfriend and i got into a heated argument that revolved around jealousy and actions that upset me (having to do with social media). Anyways, we both go hurt during the argument. I said we should both take some time away, and so far it’s been 4 days. On day 3, he messaged me telling me good luck on my exams.

I later asked him, “Hey, so where do we stand with each other”. And that ended badly, because i asked if he wanted to break up.

Anyways, this is causing me a lot of pain and i am just building up more and more anger due to lack of communication. We still have issues that aren’t resolved.

I messaged him telling him this. But i said it nicely.

Anyways, how long is too long to take away from a relationship? I am in so much agony being away.

Also, when we have had fights. He’s gotten upset with me posting on social media (pictures of myself). Because, he said it’s like i am not really upset. But, he’s the one posting and sending things too. So i don’t get it?


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What Guys Said 2

  • It sounds like a lot more is going on in this relationship than the amount of time to take a bresm from it. To answer your original question the amount of time to take a a break is up to any time you cannot commiunicate nor think about each other anymore. That's the limit. It varies based on relationship

    • There is a lot of resentment. He thinks i am Controlling about social media. But, when he goes to random girls’ pages, likes their old photos, adds/follows random girls, adds their friends, and adds random girls to Snapchat, and he also updated his tinder profile while we were dating... it is very hard to be cool with those things.

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    • If they are friends, sure. But, not photos of random men. It’s okay if you like photos of friends. However, i use my discretion on whether a photo is appropriate to like (i don’t like shirtless pics/suggestive ones). My boyfriend has done that for his female friends (even girls he had liked in the past :/). He doesn’t add much weight to social media, but i do.

      The thing that bothered me the most was when he followed a girl he met at school (still doesn’t tell me how he met her at school). And then, a few months later he followed her best friend too (who he doesn’t know). This is just strange behavior to me...

      A part of me wants to move on, but, in person he is very loyal and not like he is on social media.

    • Well I definitely can't tell you what to do. My opinion is he likes to look. Which isn't a bad thing currently. But it could grow into more. And even if not are you okay with you not having his full attention

  • The same amount of time it takes to be with someone and no longer be able to say you're not in a relationship.

    • I feel 4 days is a long time to not talk.

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    • Did you read my question? We are not talking because of an argument.

    • The why isn't relevant. You asked how long is too long to take away from a relationship.
      I posit that the amount of time a couple can "be on a break" before they are really just broken up is the same amount of time a couple can be "just dating, we aren't using labels".

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