let go, girl. It's not worth holding onto those feelings and getting upset. You might still feel hurt years after the fact BECAUSE you never let go. The guy literally wants you to think about it for a long time and ruin your happiness. The best and most mature thing to do is let it go, trust me. You'll also stick it to him by moving on. I saw an ex many years after we broke up and she really hurt me, a hurt that disgusts me today. The way she is, she never apologized for cheating on me and treating me like a toy during a time when I was only a few months clean from meth. I don't believe she had any remorse. Anyways, I ran into her and during our conversation, her accolades after all these years was how she was sick of all the fuckboys & settled on a 30yr old, got married, etc etc. There I was, stating how I beat my addiction, kept with my passion, & turned it into a business. I've grown so massively and she never got the satisfaction. I will continue to grow uninhibited by her memory.
That's awesome 😊 im sure that took a lot of hard work and motivation and i respect that. But i don't miss my ex, i realize if he was willing to break up with me on my birthday then i dont want him anyways. I'm just glad I didn't give in to what he wanted me to do because had i done it he probably would have left anyways.
Thank you. It was the hardest thing I've ever done. Been clean from meth since January 2012. I wouldn't take back anything including all the horrible things I've done because all of that needed to happen for me to be the person I am today. And I can legitimately say with confidence that I really like who I am. You're actually handling the breakup much better than I did when I was 18. It took me a year or two to grieve/move on from her memory. I applaud you for that! What you have accomplished is not easy for a lot of people
Yes, to be fair i lost much of my interest and respect for him when he began touching me when i told him I was uncomfortable, i was getting close to breaking up with him myself but i never imagined he would do that on my birthday, that was low and it was the last straw. Now he keeps looking at all my posts on social media and it's creepy, i simply wished him luck and moved on.
block the fool. That's what I'd do. The people you let into your life are influences on your character and that dude is a ghost coming back to haunt you. Life is too precious to be wasting energy on dead-end people even if its a minimal amount
There was a post a while back on GAG about a guy who waited two years with his girlfriend and she cheated on him one night with a guy drunk. I told him to dump her immediately. He did it, I am proud of him.
I'm also proud of him
We live in a world where sex is available to women, and scarce to men. So we hold back when we really care about someone to make sure the feelings are reciprocated and he isn't just going to leave after you give him what he wants. If he leaves you because you didn't have sex with him, then you can be confident that he didn't want a relationship and that you did the right thing because you showed self control.
There are shitty women, but generally a woman who really cares will give in within 2-9 months. If you just want a hookup you need to make your intentions clear because if you lead her to believe you want more the chances are you'll be left waiting.
@Gianna17 Yeah, holding back for two years and cheating whilst drunk is 100% self-controlIf you cared about a guy you'd care about his needs too as well as your own, and women are supposed to be more empathetic?
As I said in my second reply, some women are shitty. But most will give in within 2-9 months. Unless of course she's waiting for marriage, in that case she will tell you. If you have to wait longer than a year i would have a serious conversation with her because there could be trust issues.
I dont condone that woman's behavior but i was discussing women as a whole, the situation you described is very rare
@Gianna17 Sex isn't scarce to men
I mean compared to women, generally women have a surplus of potential partners. I mean, just ask any woman about her DM's they are always full
I actually just got a DM from a guy that says "so what can I do to see you naked? 😊" these are a daily occurance, if these men were completely sexually satisfied then there would be no reason for them to harass random women online for nudes.
@Gianna17 That's crazy because I actually just got a DM from a girl that says "so what can I do to see you naked? " these are a daily occurance, if these girls were completely sexually satisfied then there would be no reason for them to harass random men online for nudes.
@CT_CD Seriously? A girl two days ago asked me that same question
Listen, that's just one example of the most recent one i recieved. It's just basic biology, in nature, a man can spread his genes faster if he has multiple partners, while women only carry one child at a time so their genes are most likely to survive if they chose a long-term mate. In a world where we have guys constantly leading us to believe they want a relationship and leaving once they get where they want its completely acceptable for me to be skeptical. I dont hold back for 9 months on every man, but if he's being sketchy and touching me when i dont want to be touched I'm going to wait until I'm sure I can trust him, my ex broke up with me on my birthday because i made him wait 4 months after he repeatedly gave me reasons to hold back. It's not that we don't care about men's needs, but we simply assume that if we can wait and hold back our needs for someone we really care about that they would do the same for us.
If you want a hookup dont expect it from a girl who wants something long-term with you, it's a basic evolutionary trick that has been proved the most efficient way for women to spread their genes.
@Gianna17 I don't think there's anything wrong with making a guy wait. Just not making a guy wait three months when she's had one night stands and banged other guys on the first date and then think he's supposed to be ok with waiting
Do you mean if she has had one night stands before or if she is doing it while making him wait? I never condone cheating, but if you are talking about having previous one night stands then i disagree, we live in a world where most people have had sex before, i personally haven't but there is nothing wrong with someone who choses to have sex with no strings attached as long as both parties consent to it, and the thing is, relationships and hookups are two very different things. When you love someone you make sacrifices for that person, and they make them in return, it is a mutual agreement not to go out and have sex with others. Whatever happens before those two people start dating shouldn't be relevant unless it directly affects the new partner (like if you have an std) but if it bothers you that much you can choose to leave. I have dated men who have had sex with other women before and i dont have a problem with that.
And if the guy in dating now decided he wanted to wait until marriage I would be fine with that because it’s a sacrifice i'm willing to take, and if you wouldn't thats fine too. You are not forced to stay with anyone if you don't want the same things out of life
To be honest, if you have questions about why people do things i highly suggest taking a psychology class. I have taken several and at this point i have very few questions and i can't even be mad at people for doing things anymore because i know why they're doing it. Humans are surprisingly very predictable if you look at it from a scientific point of view.
@Gianna17 I'm actually a psychologist
That's chill, im going to be one 🙂 i have an 100 in AP psych rn and i just got accepted into a pretty good college
Wait a second, you are 21 and you already have a PhD? Impressive.
Are you Aaron Burr? How do you graduate so fast? Did you go to college early? Because the way i calculated it i graduate this year and I won't be out of college until I'm 25. Tell me your secrets, i would love to be out and graduated and already finished an internship and have a job 4 years early.
Does this make me Alexander Hamilton? What bursar do i have to punch to get such an opportunity?
@Gianna17 I was smart enough to skip middle school and go straight to high school
Litty titty, I have ADHD and i did well but i still had a lot of trouble until i was diagnosed.
@Gianna17 Genetic material is actually stored in a women's body from ALL HER SEXUAL PARTNERS. These genes do get passed down to a child to varying degrees
That's not true at all, the baby inherits the genes from the sperm and the egg. Any sperm that make it into a woman's body and doesn't fertilize the egg dies out within a few days at most.
@Gianna17 you are right. The article I read turned out to be fake. Disguised as a TIMES website.
Yes, i was just about to write that, i looked it up and i realized the oldest story i could find had no link to the study and i looked at the url and noticed the same thing, all other articles didn't provide a source either
And it claimed to use fruit flies which I found odd, i figured it would be very difficult to study each fly you'd think they would use something easier to work with and more similar to humans.
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Yeah but you don't sleep with guys on the first date
you wouldn't wait for me, you think i'm a tramp.
Lol god no, i don't get the sleeping with someone on a first date thing, i couldn't do that.
Women do not want to look at as just a booty call or a sex thing or object.
>has sex with 100 men>waits with one guy>i wanted it to be special lol xd
The guy would end up with herpes after the special night
"Just not making a guy wait three months when she's had one night stands and banged other guys on the first date and then think he's supposed to be ok with waiting" CT_CDMakes sense when he says it
Sex without emotional attachment is truly pointless like masturbation
@Streak I agree, which is why I don't do ONS or friends with benefits anymore, but i also think it is unfair to the guy
think of it this way. She plays with her toys and takes care of those that matter most
@Streak personally, i don't differentiate between a woman i would fuck and one i would date.
But they're already easy
@apple24 Thanks for an honest answer.