Why do women say you are "too nice" or "too good"?

Context here is I was bold and direct with girl I liked. I've been described by this girl as being "funny" but in the same sentence being "way too nice you know that". Also been described by same girl as "too good". That said, I feel like these are the most backhanded compliments ever and are just an easy way to say im not interested in you as she's not particularly engaging and body language is very mixed.

There is nothing to suggest attraction from her she does look at me and smile in the distance she has no problem making it obvious she is looking at me and she catches my eye etc but I feel she may just enjoy the attention because when we speak she folds her arms a lot isn't that engaging.

Anyways being told you're too nice or too good it's just a horrible way to tell someone they aren't interested.

She could simply be honest and say im not into you rather than complimenting in a way that we both know is hardly genuine.

Is this a woman's most popular way to give someone a hint when they aren't interested


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What Girls Said 1

  • True it could be used as "youre nice but I don't find you attractive"
    Or you're actually nice to a fault.
    Or she prefers dudes who are more assertive.
    Or she feels she's not good enough for you because you're so nice and good and she feels she isn't.

    You do have a good point though, it is a bit weird. If I keep getting rejected because I'm too nice or too good looking, it makes it seem like I'm supposed to be more of a horrible person or be uglier lol.

    Why don't you think it's geninue, you don't think you're nice?

    No the most popular way is to lie and say "I have a boyfriend". Then I think the runner up is "I'm not looking for anything right now" or "I see you as a friend/brother.

    • Thanks. This helped actually clear things up in my head. She says nice things but I feel her body language is mixed at best that's why being told you are too nice by text feels insincere. The word "too" is a put down. Either she is testing me, or is trying to be nice about rejecting me. Either way isn't good. Id like directness but she may have reasons I don't get. Thanks for ur help

    • No problem glad I could be of service.

What Guys Said 2

  • I think so. Too much of something inherently isn't good.

    I would just move on unless you're truly getting mixed signals because people can sometimes say the wrong thing even though they're interested because people can take things the wrong way.

    For example, if a girl called me handsome I'd probably reject that because in my history handsome is code for boosting someone up artificially and they don't mean it as a genuine complement. Although it can vary from person to person. It's just one of those things for me that makes me reject potential advances.

  • Don’t know never had the issue of people saying I’m too nice


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