Me and my boyfriend been arguing at lot from him ‘so called saying it for my benefit and for my own good’ and because I don’t agree to a lot of things he says about me because I hear them at criticism and I don’t like that as it makes me feel bad about myself and lowers my confidence, we end up arguing a lot. We have some compatibility issues, and have had minor break ups, but we always try and work through it.
It’s become so frequent that I don’t know how to deal with criticism in a relationship. Or should I just tell him to not say anything? What’s the difference between the two?
Most Helpful Guy
Criticism should ideally be constructive, it should be intended to direct you towards areas of improvement with the aim of empowering you. Criticism is also best served with some advice. Saying "You're fat" is not constructive. Saying "If you could perhaps strive to eat a little healthier you may feel better in yourself" is more constructive and helpful.
If the intention is to make you feel bad about yourself then it's unlikely to be a helpful form of criticism. Someone who loves you should not want to make you feel bad about yourself except in cases where you have clearly done wrong and are failing to grasp that.0
Most Helpful Girl
That depends. What exactly is he saying? It's hard to judge whether or not it's healthy criticism without knowing the content.1