Would you ever date a woman who is down on her luck?

I'm 31 and have been struggling with unemployment for the last 2 years. My boyfriend of 6 years left me because he couldn't deal with the stress of me not finding a job. I'm now living back at home, and am feeling like I'm about to hit rock bottom. I want to date, but I don't want to burden a guy with my problems, and I feel like no guy would want to date me now.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Sure. We've all had issues one time or another in our lives. Just because you're having trouble finding a job, doesn't mean that we should break up - unless you aren't putting a legitimate effort in finding one. Then, I could understand why your boyfriend dumped you. But the economy is rather bad right now, and has been for a while. Maybe consider a different career or try ANY job if you're not finding one in your preferred field.

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    • My ex wanted me to settle for a minimum wage, dead-end job, even though I hold 2 Masters degrees. He didn't understand that the amount of time and effort I put into getting my education. I didn't work this hard in life to just throw it all away.

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    • Is there a possibility of you opening up your own business in your field?

    • Thanks very much for MHGO.

Most Helpful Girl

  • If your man left you while you were broke it sounded like he was living off of you, that's not a real boyfriend. But I also never got why someone can be dead broke thinking about love, at least you have your family to lean on, some of us have to do it alone. That being said I cannot think about dating when I am broke, unless it's a man who till uplift and help me financially.

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What Guys Said 22

  • This assumes that she meets my standard criteria for a girlfriend (good personality, treats others well, has chemistry with me, common interests, is intelligent): for me, it would depend on the circumstances. Is she merely unemployed, or is she also deeply in debt? If the latter, I'd steer clear. The former, it would only be a factor if it looked like she would never be able to work again and would need financial support for a long time.

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  • "down on her luck" is a framework of belief, that supports your spin and control of the narrative, casting yourself as a passive effect of the greater system: women with this attitude aren't generally looking for a relationship, so much as they are looking for someone to adopt their accountability off themselves, which is the general expectation woven into the mainstream female-privelege, which men are expected to happily support and pander to, with nothing in return but feeling like they are being a good ally of a female who deserves special treatment: until you get married, and then you can really let yourself loose and treat him however you imagine your new narrative spin makes you deserving object of all your conjured expectations. Even the other replies in this thread show you how the expectations on men to be treated as open wallets, or they are morally in the wrong. There are lots of feminist ally-chumps that will probably buy into your self absorption, and pander to your sense of entitlement, that's 75% of modern courtship: validating female immaturity.

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  • well in all fairness most people are down on their luck and most of us feel like that. it's hard to look at the good or talk about the good, so maybe you can get into the habit of doing that. when you do meet a guy you will have something to talk about. befriend someone, or just talk to someone online and try to slow regain some footing in your life. you might be down but youve managed to dodge the worst cases

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  • I certainly would. People have hard times. The main thing you should look out for are people who'd want to date you for this very reason. Some people have this desire to play savior to others; that's at least coming from a noble impulse, but it's not a good basis for a relationship. What about when you start doing well again? Would that person like you still?

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  • I would try it for a while. The first couple of few months of any relationship are usually pretty causal and not too intense anyway. So if during this time you still didn't find employment, I would probably call it quits.

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  • Hay...1st of all.. dont bother much about your job and economic conditions... because... some guys don't care about those things of the girl. According my experience, I dated a girl, at that time, she had almost lost her everything... job.. etc... and we had a long lasting relationship...

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  • Two years is a long time do be doing "nothing". There must be something you enjoy doing, doesn't matter how much you make. No one wants a freeloader at home.

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  • First off, why do you feel the need to date at this point in your life.,. Set a goal and work with that till toy no longer Live with your parents... second, stay positive and don't ever let the outcome of any situation define where you stand...

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  • Maybe you should focus on one thing first and the second will automatically fall in place 😊
    Try ziprecruiter. com

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  • You're in luck... You're a woman, so yeah you will find dates. As a guy there wouldn't be a chance for you in this situation.

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  • You have a golden ticket. Its called your Vag, "Female Privelege". Sure I would consider a female down on her luck. Definitely would have to consider looks, personality, drive and compatibility. Its like buying distressed real estate property in a sense. But in all honesty I would approach with sincere feelings and hope that this is not some life event where a female will use me until she is ready to move on. Otherwise I'd probably beat that pussy up and move onto the next one. Unless a girl is being for real about true relationship, I'm sorry but your vagina is about one of the few things that may interest me if we're not friends or in a relationship.

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  • I would date a girl down on her luck, but two years without a job sounds like bigger issues than bad luck. Unless you live where there are no people, then go where the work is.

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    • Its a lot easier said than done. Where I live, everything is politics and unions. I'm highly educated and I refuse to settle for a minimum wage job fit for a high school dropout.

  • Yeah its not easy finding a job, lots of places you can't even get your foot in the door without knowing someone.

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  • Take some time and work on yourself. Get a good job and save some money. Men will still be there in a couple of years

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  • He is a cake, Hope all works out well for you :), if you want to find out anything, you can always message me.

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  • I would date a woman down on her luck. But you have to ask yourself, would you rather have a new relationship while down on your luck? Relationships can be stressful and may push you further down to hitting that rock. There is no shame, in my opinion, in having a friend with benefits if you are looking to still have sex but not sleep around. I also, do not assume that is what you are looking for as you may want the whole shebang. But it's something you really need to consider if you are down on your luck.

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  • I would it doesn't matter the situation it's what's on the inside that counts even when times are ruff

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    • But I feel like I'd be a burden, just like my ex thought of me as.

    • ur ex didn't care about u then if a person truly loves u they will be their for u through hard times

  • I was about to say yeah it's perfectly fine that you hold no jobs but I read a couple of your posts saying that you refuse to take a minimum wage job. So basically you are saying your too good to take a job you believe beneath you station. I get that you have degrees but if you need money than you shouldn't be turning anything down. I'm not saying you have to make that job your career but it brings money in untill your career gets off the ground. Anyone saying they are too good for a job when it's their only choice ant the moment even though the money is needed is a big turn off for me and sounds like it was for your boy too.

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  • You should never give up I'm sure and I'm positive you will find someone

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  • I have

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What Girls Said 2

  • Being perfectly honest, I don’t think he left because of you not finding a job, but because you turned your nose up at ones you think you’re too good for. A job is a job, money is money. It’s better to have something while you search for anything better and dumbing down a resume so you’re not over qualified isn’t hard. Not wanting to do that is simply ego.
    Were you living together and you’ve had to move home after the relationship ended?

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  • Your ex is an asshole, and that's what scares me too

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