Are monogamous relationships realistic?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Yes, of course. They happen, in reality, all the time and have so for thousands of years. Just because some people find it unbearable to be monogamous (and don't want to) doesn't negate the fact that some people want it and can do it.
    Why can't people just do what they want :)

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    • If you live as long as I have honey... bless your heart... opinions change 😂😘

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    • Oh my! Haha how's life?

    • @ladsin Wow, it's way too crazy to be honest, haha. But it's a good time to be a tiger XD

Most Helpful Guy

  • They're not realistic as far as nature is concerned, of that you could be sure. Almost anywhere in the animal kingdom. In that sense, a monogamous relationship only hinders evolution and expansion and therefore success in the natural world. Animals (including humans) naturally seek out mates according to a set of criteria, but that criteria doesn't necessarilly specify monogamy. In some cases, it specifies otherwise, even.

    Socially, yes - so much so that they exist. :P Humanity has honed an evolutionary trait not often seen in other animals -the mind- and with it expands the implications of possession and emotions that have only been strengthened by the likes of faith. In that sense, I'd wager that most of the world's societies consider it the only realistic norm.

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What Girls Said 26

  • Of course. People just love their excuses. We don't magically fall into bed with the wrong person. Poor decisions are made, temptations are indulged, and people come up w/ any way possible to shift the responsibility... i. e "I was drunk", "you weren't fulfilling my needs", "I don't love her/him the way I love you", etc.

    I like books, If I go broke over literature, I'm not suddenly deserving of my money back. If I made a bad decision, it was still made with intent.

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  • Yes, absolutely!! I don't know why our culture has tried to deem monogamy as unrealistic or difficult when it's really not that hard. If you truly do respect and love someone, you'll want to be loyal and only romantically love them.

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    • Why can you love only them?

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    • I hate to break it to you darling, but loving someone and being IN love are two completely different things. If you believe you are in love with two people, you’re just experiencing infatuation/lust. But it’s not love.

    • So for instance if ur "IN LOVE" with a man and something happens and he passes away, years down the road u find another guy & he's also everything u have ever dreamed of, ur saying u couldn't be in love with him too?

  • For most people, yes absolutely. Some people prefer non-monogamy, or just can't deal with it at all, but for most it's perfectly fine. That all said, it's completely fine if you aren't the kind of person who monogamy works for, its just that you need to make sure that the people or persons you are in a relationship with are okay with you being non-monogamous.

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  • If you’re someone who is suited to monogamy, then it’s absolutely realistic. If you’re not someone who is suited to monogamy, then it’s probably not realistic.

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  • It all comes down to personal preference. I think all kinds of relationships would hold their challenges. You do you.

    I personally couldn't have more than on relationship. I want to devote 100% of my energy to one person -- I feel like that's what my partner should deserve. People in poly relationships seem to make it work though, so that's cool. I'm just too much of an introvert.

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  • Yes. It's polygamy and all that other nonsense that is unrealistic.

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  • this sexual desperation is getting too common and scary. This IS THE NORMAL WAY. this is HOW IT SHOULD BE. whats UNREALISTIC IS UR DAMN FANTASIES SMFH

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  • Lol look at this swinging old creeper trying to justify his fetish

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    • Not at all

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    • @FS92IT I agree. My response was to the troll, not you, no worries.

    • she is rìght so leave her alone. it only comes from sexual desperation. I dont get along with someone because of sexuality I get along with him cause I have strong feelings for him and theyre stronger than my sexual desires. people nowadays are jyst sp desperate I dont fking understand it.

  • There so many people who still to this day love being with their partner so I don't know why poly lovers can't handle that some people are happy with one.

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  • I am open to polygamy but our lifestyle is so busy we don't even have time for monogamy lol.

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  • It's all realistic. People are happy or unhappy either way. I'm personally happy bring open.

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  • the idea of polygamous relationships makes my stomach sick. It kills my libido. So no.. Thanks

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  • People have been successfully living them for centuries so yeah

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    • You're wrong! Back in the day it was polygamy all the way!

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    • @SpreadingFacts

      When you study the history of the rise and fall of societies of the past, the ones that were and still are the most successful are those in which people are monogamous. Those that have become more sexually free and liberal have always fallen either due to collapse or because they were invaded/replaced by people from stronger cultures that practiced monogamy. That's why those societies from "back in the day" died out.

  • I think faithfulness is definitely worth striving for.

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  • Very realistic and HIGHLY prefered.

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  • Sorry you spelled polygamous wrong

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  • I would say so.

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  • Very.

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  • Yeah

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  • Yes I certainly hope so

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What Guys Said 39

  • Yes... only problem is that it's gotten very difficult in our culture due to how much we promote all the wrong aspects of it and fail to address the true issues of a relationship. We base it off of love and romance instead of a practical sense of how we make each other better as people and build each other up.

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  • Of course. Failure to uphold it is a matter of personal character flaw. That millions over thousands of years have succeeded at being happily married indicates that those who cannot, usually cannot because one or both partners seriously have something wrong with them.

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  • Nothing wrong with either, and both can work or not work depending on the people involved. I notice many people aren't very good at monogamy, but it's the default in our culture. Non monogamy usually requires more communication and empathy and has it's own difficulties.

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  • Not necessarily.
    There are many people who want unrealistic monogamous relationships.
    They have this specific ideal as a goal that no human being is able to fulfill and they are seeing all this with rose-colored glasses.
    My opinion is that if you stop expecting a comedy romance or fairy tale type relationship and realize that things work different in reality then yes, monogamous relationships are realistic.

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  • They are, I believe most people live like this so clearly : it is.

    What I doubt is that most are made for monogamy. Maybe more of us would benefit from more open relationships there are tens of different kind of relationships !

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  • It's been possible all throughout history so I don't know why people are suddenly thinking, "ZOMG MONOGAMY AGAINST NATURE!" Since when? Because young people today have absolutely no self control? That's bad parenting and bad role models. Nothing to do with nature. Just sheer laziness and stupidity.

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  • My parents are monogamous, as were both their parents. So are all my aunts and uncles on both my dads and moms side.
    They have all been together 20+ or 30+ years, and none of them have any issues.
    Monogamy works just fine if you are loyal, and family oriented.
    It is the most healthy and natural state of human beings.

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  • Yes. Everyone is different, we dont all follow the same mold. doesn't matter what relationship you have , so long as you are honest and ethical.

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  • i see that most young people tend to be idealistic. that's good too see.
    although today it's simpler to have monogamy relationship than it used to.
    Now we have games, porn, tv, internet. Not like in the age where fun things are only drinking, sex, dancing/singing.
    still pessimistic though coz the grass is always greener on the other side.

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  • Yes, of course they're realistic. But for them to work you have to have 2 people for whom the things that should matter do matter.

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  • No. The problem is that so many people are all about themselves. They want the benefits of marraige but won't accept any negative drawbacks as well as an inability to stay loyal or to stick around when times get tough

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  • Only on the online world do people actually think to ask questions like this.. LMAO.. Pretty sure most people have one person whom they want to stick to.. Even if their eyes avert from time to time..

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  • Not in the current oooh-I-am-a-worthless-piece-of-white-trash-girl - but I want you to do everything for me because iPhone tell me I am like a princess, no.
    No one will put up with that BS longer than a few minutes or hours. Not without looking for a girl that values effort and work and does those herself. Or treats a man like he's a man, not her kicking target.

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  • For some species, and not for others. Humans are a weird species in that it appears to be both natural and unnatural

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  • They sure are. I have my parents and grandparents as proof. Sure, there is the occasional hickup but it works.

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  • Honestly I don't think so. Monogamy is an admirable goal, but every relationship gets stale sooner or later.

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  • I feel like it no longer exists in today's society.

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    • Oh my God ! Tell me where you are stuck, I'm bringing a rope to get you out of your very deep well !

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    • I want to quickly add too that my guy had terrible luck in relationships. He dealt with erectile dysfunction due to being rejected in the past and chose to abstain from sex for 3 years before we met. But like a puzzle, we fit perfectly. It didn't bother me that he had his struggles with dating in the past, and had anxieties around forming relationships and women. All I knew is that I liked who he was. He emitted a radiance I had never seen from any other man, despite a bit of a lack of confidence.
      In the end, he realised he had nothing to worry about because he found a person who was/is genuinely interested in associating with people who have spirit and who are fundamentally good.

      Fast forward a few years and a baby, it's as though you could never tell he had intimacy challenges. Not only is he the best sex I've ever had, but he's an amazing father and partner.

      Sorry to ramble

    • Very uplifting story ! Thanks !

  • Yes. A man has a single penis, which is only capable of penetrating a sole vagina at a time.

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  • It's very realistic so long as you're intelligent and go for a compatible personality.

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  • Yes, if both people intend to have a monogamous relationship

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