Can you become attracted to someone who you weren't at first attracted to?

A guy started talking to me who at first I really wasn't attracted to. However after texting him more and meeting him alone a few times I'm starting to change my mind. I'm starting to look past the things I didn't like about him before and I really enjoy talking to him. If attraction develops like this is it really only their attention you're attracted to or can you become attracted after getting to know someone more?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I used to strongly dislike a girl I know. She's sassy, thinks she's always right, and not too bright either. The idea of me and her was repulsive to me, but now I can't stop thinking about her.

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    • That's soo cute

    • I don't think anything will come of it, but things have changed over time. She wants me to invite her over when I make spaghetti. Had she said that a year ago, I would have laughed. She used to anger me, a lot.

Most Helpful Girl

  • Yes you can. At the risk of sounding old age, I’m not sure at your age.

    Let me explain.

    My first love was a whirlwind, as they typically are. I went through a ridiculous amount of shit and by the time I met my now boyfriend I didn’t know which way was up. I convinced myself I felt nothing. When we went separate ways, I realised it wasn’t true.

    My boyfriend sort of ticks the boxes, and that’s why I grew to love him. I dated someone before who ticked the boxes and it was awful. Most people’s first loves don’t last because they are unrealistic. And for that reason I think you need that first unrealistic love to really appreciate the next.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 21

  • Yes...
    That's the very reason people get attracted to each other.. in my case my girl when I first met her.. we had nothing for each other.
    But as we got close and started talking for hours on the phone, going out, being there for her problems.. made her feel like she wants me more than I am now to her.
    Tbh it is all about the guys or girls attention to you.
    If you get that... you'll be attracted! In no time

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  • It's a lot easier for this to happen to women than men. But it can definitely happen. Personality definitely matters a lot. It can make someone more attractive or make someone ugly as fuck!

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  • I think you definitely can. I have a girl who is my best friend we never fooled around kissed anything. After a few years and I'm talking 7 years of knowing her we started having sex and almost dated. I think as are both attracted to each other but don't know how to say it. Anyways moral of the story anything is possible. Good luck

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  • Yes, this is normal.
    The better friends you get with someone, the more attractive they get. This does not mean you always get attracted to them, but you start to see past their flaws the more you get to know them.

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  • Attraction is something you develop. It's not always going to be instant, and even when it is, sometimes that is a sign that the relationship is going to burn out quickly.

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  • Of course, we are so socialized into thinking that beauty is the most important, when in reality personality, ego and soul are th exist essential things about a person

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  • Yes. Intelligence, kindness, empathy, humour are all things that can grow on you after interacting with someone. Good luck with your life, you have it all to look forward to.

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  • Some people change so it is possible. I see some people desperately hope so, but I've never seen it happen personally.

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  • Ofc have sex with him already and see how u gonna feel then, if he's still nice and charming go for it...

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  • Yes but it won't last too long. It's like a temporary fault where you will fall for him, but in reality you don't like him that way

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  • DEFINITELY. I’m now attracted to the girl I called my best friend after she called me cute lol

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  • It's happened before, I become attracted to them if it compliments their personality.

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  • Personality is the most important thing in a partner. If someone just has the looks then ditch them

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  • Only once has this happened to me so yes

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  • yea absolutely

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  • What didn't you like about him before tho?

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  • Yes.. why not

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  • Of course, first impressions aren't everything

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  • Yes u can

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  • Yea, and I fell in love with her to have my heart smashed

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What Girls Said 12

  • One of my biggest crushes in high school I thought he was SO unattractive when i first met him. He was a year older and I met him when we were all in middle school and I thought his girlfriend was way too pretty for him. They ended up breaking up and me and him started talking and we would have amazing conversations. He was witty and smart and charming. So i completely ended up changing my mind. Nothing ever came of it really but yeah it's totally possible :)

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  • Yeah, it happens to people quite a lot actually. Sometimes it doesn't last, because their bad qualities just can't be ignored in the end, but if it's just a looks thing and he just isn't your usual type that can work out really well sometimes.

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  • i think you can. It means ur looking beyond his outer appearance and liking him for who he is

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  • Yeah, it's like what I feel right now. I started to have a feeling or maybe a fling with him

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  • Yes of course. I fell in love with a nerdy boy

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  • Never happened to me.

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  • Of course

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  • Yes!

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  • Yes u can love always fines a way

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  • Of course

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  • Yeah it can definitely happen but it's quite rare.

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  • yup happens all the time, it's a weird thing. I used to not be able to stand this one guy and then all of a sudden my heart would beat faster when I saw him haha

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