Can women get flustered by men approaching and conversing with them?

I'm a decent looking guy, definitely not Ryan Gosling by any means but I'm 6'3 if that helps haha. I've always thought of myself as a pretty good communicator but have recently ran into some issues with approaching women. I'll walk up say hi and initiate a convo but find that so many women seem to act a little nervous. I can see there eyes light up and gloss over slightly but more often than not i feel like they totally freeze up on me. There was one extremely beautiful women who literally just stood there smiling the whole time i was talking. Whenever I created an opening for her to respond i instead just got this super nervous vibe that kind of through me off. Do women just get completely freaked out when a random dude says hi or something? Granted this doesn't happen all the time but a lot of the time i feel like I'm missing something. Maybe I come off as creepy? Haha


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What Girls Said 2

  • I approach all the time, and if it makes you feel any better, I get that reaction from both sexes. Lol, I'm just like you except I'll awkwardly end the conversation and go cry in a corner, wondering what I did wrong. Even just making friends with girls, they can be really stranger shy. So confusing 0_ o

    The pretty girls are especially insecure because people are always drawing attention to their looks. When something goes wrong, they feel their looks are partially to blame, or just themselves period. They fear if they're not gorgeous all the time (smudged eyeliner), or say the perfect thing, that deep down people are going to hate them. All that fear means they never take risks, would never initiate convo, or express themselves freely for fear of judgment. I struggled with this too, until I realized that being super dolled up and expecting everyone else to do the footwork when it came to socializing wasn't getting me anywhere.

    When a freeze up girl like that meets someone who is totally comfortable with themselves, meeting them eye-to-eye, expecting something real and not just predictably gushing over the way they look -- its unexpected. It catches them off guard. They're prob the type that doesn't have much interesting input, and prefer to be in a group/clique. It's safer, less risky. They'd prob need to be in an environment that's less risky, like at home, or around close family, and literally be spoonfed new friends. They expect friends with no risk, effort, or sacrifices. Not surprisingly they're the same girls that never text me back. Pisses me off!!

    I promise you they don't realize they have a doe-eyed look. No, it's not you. You're not creepy. And no, you're not going to be able to change them. End it casually and move on. That same girl when you meet her again, might be less antsy but trust me, it's way too much work.

    As long as your approach is respectful, not overly focused on her looks, asking polite questions, there's no way an outgoing girl with HEALTHY self-esteem would think you're creepy. Even if I reject a guy, I often compliment him for his respectful approach because it's so rare nowadays. Check out my comment that reflects a similar annoyance

    • Wow that was a great answer! I can definitely over analysis situations if I'm not 100% sure what the problem was to begin with. There are a few women at the gym i go to that i constantly catch glancing at me at least 10-15 times per session. Now I'm a little old school and would never try hitting on these girls because everyone always proclaims the gym as "off-limits". One time i said screw it and walked up to one of them who I'm pretty sure was purposely working out close to me or in the same proximity and gave a friendly hi followed by a short non-sexual conversation. Once again she just kind of stood there with a smile and glossy eyes but wouldn't really try to engage with me. You always here about how the most beautiful women get hit on all day everyday but man a pretty smile and face can only do so much for me lol I know i can't be blowing them away with my looks so it has to be something! anyways i appreciate your feedback! :)

    • Wow, you're already ahead of the game approaching girls in non-club environments! Gym is off limits? Never knew that. I guess that's why people look at me weird, lol. Personally, I love connecting with fun people (not just for dating), so if you have enough confidence to approach, a bit of wit and decently attractive, I'd be psyched!! If we share a laugh, soon I'd be hyper, talking fast, joking waay too much (*snort laughs anyone) and being playful and flirtatious. Don't waste your time with those glossy eyed, doe-eyed ninny girls that can't open their mouth. Sheesh. They irritate me to no end. I posted an answer to how to approach girls Ladies, would you rather be approached in a grocery store or a night club? ↗

      No problem, I love giving feedback to proactive guys.

  • Yeah women get like that you are not creepy lol


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