My boyfriend takes me for granted and I don't feel like his girlfriend anymore. why is he being like this?

I have been with my boyfriend for a year and a half and its been a rollercoaster. we have had 2 breaks but they literally only lasted a month then we got back together again. we live together and when we got back together after our last break up it was intense. it was passionate and loving and when we didn't have our kids.. he has 2 i have 3 every other weekend our time was spent together doing things. cuddling on the sofa etc. now month by month i feel more like his maid then his girlfriend. i clean and tidy the house all the time and when i want to try and get some attention he is too busy on his phone on facebook or playing xbox with his mates. i stopped playing xbox and lost all my friends as he would say i was flirting with them all when i was like a dude with them and they all know my partner as they have played with him too. as soon as i go distant or seem off with him everything is lovey dovey from him and he makes the effort but then it goes back to square one. he makes me feel insignificant as about marriage he says we will never get married or have a baby but then confuses me as he got me a promise ring last year and makes me wear it on my wedding finger while we are out and saying to his friends while they are around about me being his future wife. and to my kids about being his kids steps siblings soon. just feel really confused as i want a future with him as i love him but i feel like he says things to keep me on a shoe string or when i am being distant and as soon as he feels that he has me when he wants me he goes back to making me feel unwanted.

i just feel used as he was engaged to his kids mum at a youngish age and had two kids with her but she is a horrid cheat that ended up with one of his friends but he treated her with so much love and he says to me he can't be the same to me after what she's done to him. nut i was hurt badly by my ex who made me feel worthless all the time and emotionally abused me but still opened my heart to my boyfriend.

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What Guys Said 2

  • Stop working so much don't tell him but try to make him do something by himself with you not telling him to, by the way. he's just using you like a child their mother, my mum did the same and it worked.

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  • You two do have problems, tried talking to him about your feelings and thoughts?

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    • yes and then he says i don't appreciate him and anything he does. he will do the odd occasion when he cleans up and then strops at me as i haven't noticed or praised jim but when i do it i dont expect praise i just want a nice clean house for us ans the kids ans have clean washing for all of us. He has done big things for me like he bought me a car to learn to drive but then he drives it a lot and hasn't really helped me to learn and admitted he always wanted one of those cars so feel like it was more of an excuse so he could get one eventhough he has a car already. like loads of times i said i dont feel loved or when i am unhappy and he just says you know where the door is just leave then.. no fight to keep me but of i start to do things about leaving he says that everybody gives up on him and for me to leave to finally find happiness then all we do is make up and it repeats again.. weeks or a few months later.

    • You two are unhappy

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