How do I shut up the matchmaker part of me?

With my temperament and personality, combined with my status of being single my whole young adult life, I can't help following this mental track where I evaluate every girl I meet, weigh pros and cons, automatically start trying to figure out how to get every girl to like me romantically. It's like an annoying friend from school that continuously asks you if you're seeing anyone, who you should date, etc. I just wish that part of me would SHUT UP before it ruins the very thing it seeks to accomplish. It makes every attempt to develope a friendship feel fake and guilt ridden, there's no joy in it.

How do I make that nagging part of me be quiet and just let things develop (hopefully) in a healthy way?


Most Helpful Girl

  • I think its good you do this. I did it too and it helped me come across who i truly want


Recommended Questions


Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 0

The only opinion from girls was selected the Most Helpful Opinion, but you can still contribute by sharing an opinion!

What Guys Said 1

  • Unless your goal is to be friends with every girl and never have a relationship for the rest of your life, I don't know why you would want to shut this voice out, dude.

    • Because it's obsessive, it's desperate. You don't grow a plant by pulling on it to stretch it out, or measuring it constantly to see if it gets bigger. You just let it do it's thing.

      It also quenches my own feelings because the focus is on getting unsingle, and not the girl herself.

    • You see an attractive girl, you talk to her, you ask her out, you get to know her and you take it from there. That's all there is to it.

      If you're sitting on a date with a girl, you bet your ass she'll be evaluating you. That's what you do. You said you evaluate girls, that's part of getting to know them... So I don't get how you now say you can't get too know girls because you're too busy focusing on 'getting unsingle'.

Recommended myTakes