you're right, but what if your love could fix him
Love can't fix anyone. They fix themselves because they want to and are ready to make the effort. Accepting love is a byproduct of that
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can you explain to me how it works?I feel like I've got a lot of love to give, I want a girlfriend, build something.Every time I go out, I get rejected by every single girl, and then I become depressed, insecure, question my self-worthcausing me to slouch, and become even more unattractive.When I hear you say "with insecurity comes control", what comes to mind is my belief that all women want to be sluts and fuck whoever they want and that love is a lie.
You have to change your whole outlook. Only you can do that. Be somewhat like my guy, when I met him. In the first week at my new uni, there was this guy with an infectious laugh. The sort that makes others laugh, even in they do not know why. I did not speak to him the whole of the first week, except to say good morning. The second Monday morning, he placed a mug of coffee in front of me, just as I like it. We spent the whole of that day talking. Went for a meal that evening. Became an item. All because he wanted to know who owned that little round bum at the desk inside the door.You have to find this level of confidence. Have the attitude, "I ain't gonna win them all, but I'll have a good try with this one!" Did not win her? Do not take it to heart! Try the next one! Lose faith, and you start to lose the ability to catch any. An important thing is not to come across as desperate. Treat everything in a light hearted way. The time to get serious is in the future.
Unless you can overcome this insecurity, any girl will run, as they can foresee the red flags. Insecure guys can get jealous. Jealous guys can become control freaks.
I see, you are right. thank you
You are most welcome!
I was about to write the same thing but you said it so well.It's the same for me :)
Like others have said it's not anyone else's responsibility to fix someone, it's that persons job to do it, those people have learned that no matter how hard someone tries to help it'll never work unless that person chooses to do it themselves. In this case a bit of tough love works best. There are healthcare professionals who are trained at helping those people and they're the only ones that can. Nobody likes to be controlled and they shouldn't be either.