We dated for about 2 years in a long distance relationship and within the last year got engaged ^_^ I couldn't be more happier to be engaged to an awesome guy. Sadly, we broke it off because we both realize we truly wasn't ready for that stage in our lives. . Ever since then..it seems like things were never the same. We fought a lot, said hurtful things to each other and did hurtful things as well. I kept leaving because of the pain..and he said hurtful things that just kept pushing me way from him emotionally. Because of this, we've been on and off for about 6 months. We both wanted to make it work, so we tried every way possible. Asking God to guide us to taking it slow..sadly everything just kept getting more confused and we both can't seem to get back to how we once was. I'm still deeply in love and miss him very much. However, even though we broke up, we still kept in touch, usually through text. But whenever it seems like I bring up getting back together, he either ignores me or tells me it to just wait and see what happens. I couldn't understand it so I left him initially because I felt that he was just playing with my emotions and stringing me along or that he just wanted me to be in his life..but not as his girlfriend. Knowing this as a possible was heartbreaking :(
I did well as to stay away from him but within a week I gave in and ended up calling him to see how he was doing. He actually responded back and we talk for about 3 hours. After I tried to end the convo, he said he didn't want me to go. So we been talking everyday since. As of recently...i mention us getting back together once again and he told me he didn't want to date me. I was hurt beyond words. The guy I was madly in love with didn't want to date me after all that we've been through. I asked him did he mean..right now..or never ever ..and he said as of right now...but who knows in the future. He mention me staying in his life as his "best friend" . He going into the army soon and I don't know if I could handle him being in the army if we do get together. in the future...because the pain hurt me so much I told him that if we can't date, then we can't be friends. Now I'm just devastated. I love him like crazy, more than I ever love a guy and I just don't know what to do. Part of me wants to be there for him and part of me is scared that he may be comfortable with keeping me as a best friend...something I can't do because I'm in love with him . I'm just so lost. please help.
Most Helpful Girl
You both have a lot of growing up to do. He's going to be leaving for army training soon and after everything you've both put each other through, he probably really does need for you to just be his friend right now. Love him, be his friend, stop putting pressure on him (you said it yourself, you broke up with each other because you both realized you're too young and not ready) to give you more than he can right now.
His head is somewhere else right now. He needs support from a true friend, not a needy ex. He's about to go into the military, possibly be sent overseas to the middle east, and he's trying to prepare himself emotionally for something there's really no preparing yourself for. There is no room for this kind of stress in his life right now. You're dwelling way too much on this and not seeing the bigger picture. Right now, you're still a bit too focused on the hormonal love emotions and not on being a whole and healthy person in your own right.1