Do you allow you SO to have access to your phone and social media accounts?

It's actually a huge subject for a couple, and the origin of many fights. For me, my phone is complete privacy, I never asked this to any girl I was with. I don't do anything wrong with other girls or whatever but I can't handle a girl who asks me to look at my phone, my messages, or even to know my passwords. I already had a fight with an ex who did not understand why I did not want to, and thought I was being unfaithful. Is it so hard to understand that I don't want someone (even if she is my gf) to randmoly pick up my phone and spying on my texts, pics, contacts, apps?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • No because 1. If they need it it shows a lack of trust. 2. If my friends tell me something private it's not fair on them she knows just because she wants access to my private conversations

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    • Finally someone who understand my point of view, and above all you're a girl, I was desperate

    • I really don't understand people who think just because you don't want them looking through your phone that means you have something to hide.

    • My phone is intimacy and I don't accept my girl to have an unlimited access to it just because she can't eve' trust me. I don't like being spied or watched

Most Helpful Guy

  • No.

    Everyone is entitled to their privacy.

    A partner who asks for access to such shows they do not trust you.

    No trust, no relationship.

    Additionally, when someone is having a conversation with me, they know it's just ME, no one else is reading it.

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    • I wouldn't like to message a male friend and know that I could talk to his girlfriend at the same time

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What Girls Said 24

  • My phone is free reign. If my boyfriend wants to look through it, he can but he never asks to. He's private with his and I respect that.

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    • My girlfriend says I can look through her phone whenever I want to, but I never do, I don't want to

    • Well it's like... if I don't trust him why be with him? I should be able to tell if something's up without going through his photos and texts.

  • I do but not so he can check up on me. He has some of my accounts (e. g. facebook and steam and this) because I use the same couple of passwords a lot like an idiot and I've asked him to log into different things for me on his computer before to check things for me. Theoretically, with that information, he has access to any of my accounts, even without me explicitly giving him that access on an individual basis. He never asked for those passwords either, they're all cases where I have given them to him freely so he could do something for me. He knows I have no issue with him using my accounts or profiles for things if he wants to play around for a while. He also has access to my phone since he doesn't really have one of his own, so he uses mine to talk to people or play games or take dumb selfies, though all of our friends know I'm happy for them to use my phone whenever they want, I've never hidden my passcode from them. Since I know his intentions with my accounts, I have no issue with him knowing how to use them. If he had asked me for access so he could check what I was doing or who I was speaking to or told me to let him see my conversations or whatever, then I would immediately change all passwords and lock him the fuck out because I don't want to be spied on. So for me, whether or not he gets access to my accounts depends on why exactly he would want that.

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  • If you have nothing to hide, then you shouldn't have anything her looking at your phone every once in a while. But its bad if she's obsessive about it, i. e. wanting to check your texts and social media everyday. Then maybe she's actually the one with something suspicious going on.

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    • It's not that I have something to hide. It's just a matter of privacy. My phone is my business and if you trust me, you don't require me to have access to phone and social media whenever you want. My phone is my intimacy you know?

    • I understand you're side too. Personally I've been cheated on before, so that's always something I'm insecure about is being cheated on again. Maybe she feels the same way?

    • Yes she was, and I understand she could be insecure about it. But the only thing I ask is trusting me without spying on me

  • I wouldn't want him to look through my phone but if he wanted to borrow my phone to make a call I'd give him my password if it was already in his hand bc I don't have anything to hide but at the same time I don't want someone looking through my phone and I'd trust that he wouldn't

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  • I guess I kinda do. Like when we are together our phones aren't that important. However we both know each others password (I know his as its obvious, easy and he doesn't hide it and he knows mine so he can reply to texts when I'm driving)

    I've nothing to hide from him, however I wouldn't just pick it up and snoop and I trust that he would respect me the same way

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  • We have nothing to hide, so my phone and my BF's phone are always left in full view. I only have GAG, and Whatsapp for messaging my mum and brother. GAG is always open on my PC. I wonder if my boyfriend has ever put some opinions and comments on GAG, on my behalf!

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  • My boyfriend knows my pin to my phone but he doesn't know the passwords to my social media. He could probably guess them easily but he always know that he could just ask to look through my social media and I would open it and let him look through it. I have nothing to hide.

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  • I wouldn't of had any issue with it but my ex wouldn't do the same with his. He is sneaky, would rather look over my shoulder and to see my password and snoop then ask me out right. His phone is his price possession on silent, always close and password protected.

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  • We both have each other's master chrome passwords. But it's just so that we can check important messages for each other if one of us can't get to a computer. I wouldn't care if he snooped, and I don't feel the need to.

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  • Me and my boyfriend normally share phones, like when his phone is charging he can use mine

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  • Yeah too controlling if you ask me, so no. If I'm with you, I want to be with you. Trust me and I trust you.

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  • No. I mean, we use each others phones but we don't snoop. I don't feel the need. Privacy and trust is important.

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  • Trust! I’d never look through his phone and he shouldn’t look through mine

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  • I don’t see this as a huge deal. I’m not his property and he is not mine. He’s welcome to connect to my accounts as a friend or follower or whatever but he’s not entitled to my password or to monitor my activity. If it so happens that he needs my phone to use it he’s welcome to do so, that’s what people that trust each other do. I behave online in ways that do not violate his trust in me nor do I even give an impression that i could be doing something inappropriate. I expect the same and trust him to behave that way therefore I do not need to monitor what he does.

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  • I would't really like it but if he wants my phone password, then he will have to give me mine too 😅😅

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  • My phone is completly unlocked at home so if my oh wants to go on it for what ever reason he also knowd my Facebook password. It's not so he can check up in me its if I'm busy and I get a message ill ask him to read it for me but if were out and about he knows my phone password he also plays games on my phone with it being android a lot of games are free thst you have to pay for on the iPhone. Same with his phone my thumb is registered for the same reason but also for when we're in the car I can change song read his messages and stuff out to him. I know his Facebook for when he asked me to check something out for him. We don't sneakily go behind each others back and read them.
    I know a lot people do it if they've had past relationship problems and they struggle to come to terms with it or there just genuinly insucure. To be honest a lot of people know mine and my fiances phone passwords.

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  • Lol i let my boyfriend did it before but it was toxic , so for the 2nd time around he's dping gopd so far on not checking my phone.

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  • Nope.

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  • Nope. & I don't ask for their information, either.

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  • No way i need my privacy

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  • I don’t care honestly

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  • If my partner felt something was off or if i was acting weird and needed to ease his mind i would not have a problem with it.
    As someone who's been in the situation where i suspected someone of cheating and asked to see messages, was denied, then found out he was cheating, i understand how shit gets in your head and twists you. If it sorted out any problems why wouldn't you?
    I mean, if you're that serious and you shit with the door open, what in your phone would you want privacy from?

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    • Converdations between me and my friends, my stuff, my mails, my private life

  • If you've caught them doing some dirty shit before, yes, you have every right to, specially if they're trying to gain your trust. Otherwise you have issues.

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  • I think you'll be great if you explain it better to a girl. Best of luck.
    Yes, my boyfriend actually randomly told me his password to his phone, i never asked, & i thought it was appropriate to give access to my phone too as a result.
    It's more of a comfort thing, and convenience to if he wants to play a song on my phone, or i want to leave him a selfie on his, also we both are in a friendship group together so our groupchats are dast to access if i or he already has the other's phone nearby/in hand.
    We operate together nicely.
    Just tell your girlfriend, a trusted one though, she can have access to your phone as long as she doesn't abuse it by literally stalking it or "checking" you. If she does, she ain't the right girl and then you know.
    But if you tell her "hey can you go kn my phone next to you and play that song" for instance & she does, it's a nice dynamic.
    And by extension you knowing you can trust her and she for you is really nice

    Just a suggestion. Not an order😂

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What Guys Said 3

  • Sorta, I will allow her because I have nothing to hid but she won't let me... But yet again she also uses this app so I kinda have to be careful I guess

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  • If your not hiding anything why not tell her

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    • Matter of privacy. My phone is my business, my intimacy and I don't like someone to have access all the time

    • Show All
    • I know it's a big deal for me and I could seem to overreact a bit. But I can't live with the fact of being spied, my activity checked etc

    • Okay you made your choice

  • Hell no. If she doesn't trust me; we're finished.

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