What are some red flags on a first date?

Coming from a guy or a girl's perspective?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • If they talk a lot about an ex

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    THIS IS NOT RELEVANT ANYMORE

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What Guys Said 19

  • She only talks about herself. She says that guys are such fuckbois and its hard to find a gentleman. But when you ask her did she treat her ex boyfriend special she says no its the guys job to treat the girl special. ... Lmao NOPE.. She wants a servant.

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  • On a first date, the red flags for me include:
    - having her phone out
    - talking about marriage and children
    - bitchy gossip
    - expecting me to pay for the whole date
    - talking about past relationships
    - sounding entitled
    - putting down my interests
    - bad hygiene
    - lateness
    - obstinately thinking I should have the same values and interests
    - trying to touch my food when she barely orders anything for herself

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  • Do they text someone a lot
    Do they make frequent phone calls
    Do they make frequent excuses to
    use the bathroom
    They fail to have money on the date
    They ask to borrow money
    Do they cut the date short for no
    apparent reasons.

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  • Talking about past relationships, any sort of bad behavior/attitude like being rude to wait staff, anything racist, getting heavy into politics or religion right off the bat. Looking at their phone too much. Not being able to hold a conversation.

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  • Talking about marriage and children. Complaining/venting about their day/week/life. Asking me how much I make or otherwise probing as to how much money my job pays.

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  • Well for me one red flag is when u are on a date leave ur phone at the side u have the person infront of you u dont have to be rude that goes for guys and girls cause when i am out i see couples only on their phone and not talking i hate that

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  • What you said, but also regarding the payment. I think it should always be split. Always, unless we're in a dedicated relationship.

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  • If she started talking about marriage and having children I'd be out of there faster than you could say I do.

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  • if she's willing to date me, that right there is a p huge red flag

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  • Not paying attention, showing ungratefulness, using your cellphone.

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  • Her not paying for my dinner is a red flag

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  • Social Justice Warrior

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  • Being rude to someone!!! Busy with cellphone.

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  • Not even showing up

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  • She uses her cell phone.

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  • Complaining too much

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  • Eyes on the cell phone. Checking out other guys.

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  • talking about religion, politics and sex. they are the three biggest trolling topics in the world, and noone wants to get in to a fight on a first date. you're just trying to find out things like "what would you do if, such and such", not "do you believe in god"

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  • swearing, farting, burping, being a feminist, not putting out.

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What Girls Said 7

  • Well for ME.
    -Catching them out on lies, i am VERY good at this even if i do not make the person aware i know they've lied to me,
    - Not asking me any questions about myself (take that as they're not interested)
    - Rude, no manners.
    - Being on there phone while chatting to you. (never happened to me but it is a obvious red flag)
    - Negative/ extremely pessimist.
    - Very arrogant, self important attitude.
    - Very judgmental.
    - Very sexual, touchy feely.
    -Talking about a ex a lot (had this)
    - Arriving late.
    Etc..

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  • It depends on what your beliefs, values, principals, morals, views, etc are concerning about what you are seeking in a partner. Everybody has their personal red flags. And there are universal.

    Univeral red flags are these:

    - Not paying attention to what you are saying more than half the time
    - The conversation is all about them. They don't include you in it, or value your input if they don't already give theirs for yours.
    - They don't bother to ask personal questions about YOU. I know a lot often lie and don't want to 'expose' themselves so quickly [sorry, truth], but only you would know what qualifies that person to date you exclusively. That is why I always say start out as friends first, then see if dating is possible between you two.
    -Trying to get sexual and touching you inappropriately. This is a no-no. But many do it and want to know why they're having issues. Or fail at dating. Let alone this MeToo movement starting to spread quicker.
    - They're rude to others and even you if you have a disagreement. There is no need for somebody to get nasty regardless how awkward it appears.
    - They seem uninterested in anything you do or say.
    - They are talking bad about their ex's as if they are obsessed with them.

    Either way, these are overall dating red flags and not just 1st date red flags.

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  • Being rude to the server, unkempt appearance/ poor hygiene, only talking about themselves, and expecting you to pay for them.

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  • When he answers his phone during dinner or if he flirts with the waitress

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  • When someone expects sex and gets mad when you say no

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  • They smell

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  • Constantly talking about sex
    No effort with appearance
    One sided convo
    Turning up late with no apology

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