The guy I am dating will not flirt or compliment me. What is going on?

I have currently went on 1 date with this guy and since then we have texted non stop. And one thing that I have noticed is that when I send little flirty or cute texts he just sends a regular text back. For example we were texting and I was sitting by myself in a downtown area and it was a beautiful day. I then texted him a pic and said "I wish you were here with me right now. It is such a beautiful day." His response was "yeah it's gorgeous". I was hoping to get a text a little more on the flirty side and less about the weather. I have also complimented him multiple times and he hasn't once complimented me. It is really hard for me to tell if he is interested, if I am moving too fast, or if he is slowly putting me in the friend zone. I mean we talk all the time and even a few deep convos but I feel like i need more conformation from him that he is interested. What do you guys think? By the way our 2nd date is tomorrow.

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  • He has huge trust issues & does not want to admit/show he’s into you in my opinion. But you don’t have to settle for this. You could tell him straight up that if he can’t show he wants you or respond in any kind way to gtfo.

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    • Thank you for the insight. So through your point of view, if I decided to persue a relationship with him it would take a lot of time to build a solid foundation before he might feel comfortable expressing himself romantically to me?

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    • I think you are investing a lot of energy into someone you’ve only been on two dates with. When you originally posted I thought you knew the guy longer. I said give it a month since you seem to want to give him a shot. Personally, if someone was never contacting me first & they had a negative tude whenever I said nice things I would just tell them it’s not working & move on. If they want to try harder they can but I would not put my life on hold waiting for them.

    • You are totally right! And I agree. I will give it a try but make sure to put myself first. Thanks for all your help!!

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What Girls & Guys Said

15
  • Give him some more time. To my knowledge, there is no mandatory time table in black and white for relationship progression. If the behavior continues after a few more weeks, start to dial down your behavior and see if this affects his.

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  • Well if your going on a second date I'd say that's a good sign but I'd bring it to his attention that he's kind of giving you the cold shoulder. Just maybe bring it up in a joking way so you don't sound serious or bothered about it. He could just be trying to feel you out still. Maybe he's not sure how he feels about you yet and he wants to take it slow. Maybe he needs to get to know you better before he gets flirtatious. I think he's still trying to feel you out and see what your about. Some people don't want to jump straight in. Some people need a trial period to see if they are compatible before they try to take things to seriously flirting to some people is taking a step towards being a couple so it's a bigger deal to some people than it is to others). I'd never intentionally flirt with someone like that if I want sure if I liked them yet so I wouldn't lead them on.

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  • He could be testing the waters and doesn't want to push you and make a bad move. He may act more bold after the 2nd date

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    • Thank you for your point of view and I hope so.

  • He's either autistic or not seriously interested in you

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  • He is not into you

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    • Depressing, but thanks for your input.

    • It just means you can do so much better.

    • Thank you. It just sucks feeling like I am in limbo and having to even be on this website because he is confusing me with his lack of romantic responses. I just honestly want to know if I am wasting my energy and time on something that he knows deep down is not going to work.

  • He's possibly dead

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    • This isn't really helpful...

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