Indecisive Heart: Thoughts?

'William' is my current 1.5 year boyfriend that I have had a steady relationship with. Our communication is on point and we are happy together. 'Sam' is the guy friend I have always considered myself close to.

I miss Sam badly and I'm starting to wonder if I have feelings for him. Sam is unique from every other guy. He brings out my emotions; I can't hide them to him. He and I instantly connected, whereas every other guy I've gone through an awkward period (even William) He challenges me and REALLY understands me. What terrifies me even more is I accept him for himself. I wanted a guy that he lived in one state. He is the type of guy to move states and countries, but it doesn't phase me. He has some issues with family, but he treats people well and it doesn't concern me. I feel like part of love is trying to stop putting the person you care about on a pedestal and I've accepted Sam naturally for who he is. Whereas with William, I had to learn to accept some things with him. I'm worried though. William is an amazing boyfriend, but I feel that Sam prevents me from giving my entire heart to William. Sam has a part of my heart. I've tried to let the friendship die, but I can't. There is something always keeping us from being fully separated. I have not seen him for almost an entire year, nor have we dated, but I feel strongly for him. I never thought this was possible. I don't know if Sam has feelings for me or if he cares about me, but part of me wants to try to see what we could be. I also feel terribly wrong that I can't do this to William, but I think a part of me should break up because even if I can't be with Sam, I don't think I can give my heart to William with Sam in the picture. Both Sam and William will be going into the military. Sam is going in April and William in August. I'm afraid that I'll miss Sam more than William and that I'll realize Sam really has had my heart even when I've refused to acknowledge my emotions throughout the years. Thoughts?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • To put it in one line, you already know the answer. It's Sam because you have better chemistry and connects more easily with him. It will always be tricky when both of them will be around and you have to choose. There will be a day when it's Sam and the there could be day when it's William. It's time you make a clear decisions to avoid any future problems

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  • You don't have to give up a friendship to have your relationship. Feelings aren't some singular thing to give away you can feel things for multiple people. Just choose who you want and commit to him dammit. This could have been avoided if you weren't acting like Charlie fuck g brown. Be decisive for once

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  • Sounds like a polyamorous relationship is the way to go

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