Girl I went out with recently got out of a long term relationship, what should I do?

Hey there,

I met this girl and started chatting with her. We ended up going out on a date and really hit it off, even talking about future dates. At the end she had asked me to text her when I was home, which I did, and over text she said she had had fun.

She pretty much ignored me the rest of the day, but she said she had to study so I thought nothing of it...

I woke up the next day and found she had removed me on social media, so I texted her to ask what was up (not in a clingy way mind you).

She got back to me saying her ex had found out we went on a date and I found out that, after grilling her a bit, they had only broken up a week before. It seemed like she ended up being really upset all around and I told her that I understood she needed to take some time since she had dated him for a year and just got out of it.

I haven't liked anyone I've been out with in years and safe to say I was really dissapointed and upset when I found out she had lead me on and dragged me through this, but now I'm trying to figure out what I should do from here...



Most Helpful Guy

  • Tread carefully, she's probably still with him and or sleeping with him, I'd pack bag while you could unless she's willing to bury the past with the ex.
    The last 2 years of my 6 year relationship we didn't even have a title on it and she was still showing up at my house for sex half the time but I've seen the that type before but on the other hand she could just be dealing with a lot and still needs time to recover who knows, hope that helps. ✌

    • Thanks for the response. I'm not 100% sure but I'm assuming he's from her home town and unless they go to the same school (which I don't think is likely) they would be dating long distance. I'll tread carefully.

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What Girls & Guys Said

  • If you like her, I'd give her another shot.

    • I do. I guess the issue is that she hasn't really had enough time to get over her ex. Maybe wait a month?

    • There's no set time. Just ask her to confirm she is over him before you go out on a date with her.

    • Will do. I had dated someone 3 years and I'm well aware that it takes time to recover after something long term. Thanks for the help!

  • I think you give her time, so she can figure out what she wants. If you guys did really hit it off once things clear up on her side she'll get back in touch with you surely. Last thing you want is to be a rebound or the person she uses to officially be a statement of breaking off with her ex. I don't know her side of things or the kind of person she is but she will message you when she's ready, that being said don't wait around because what if nothing happens.

    • Good thinking. Guess it just bums me out a bit, but I'll keep my options open and see what happens. Would it be a bad idea to message her down the road you think?

    • Yeah I can understand why you'd feel bummed out. I think as long as you're not solely fixated on the whole thought of her owing you something example being your girlfriend than yeah find out how she's doing later down the road. I hope everything turns out the way you want it to

  • you're the rebound guy, enjoy it while it lasts


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